Wow, this is amazing. I can't help but think of all the sarcastic answers I would give the so-called manager with a slight grin on my face. Seriously, I think this list is a potent illustration of modern management bullcrap. Come on guys, don't do this to your team, they are not children...
it's like talking to a superior who poses as a psychologist without any training in it. lots of power to the manager and an invitation for abuse. pretty much the reason why I'd never slave as an employee. sorry you're being downvoted. it seems there are many here who have underlings and therefore benefit from such a farce.
But even barring that, “just don’t work for anyone else” is not actionable.