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1-on-1 meeting questions

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Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#31

Post by NikolaNovak »

awakeasleep wrote: post #23

Many of these will come off as frustrating and manipulative. When I, a manager, ask “what is the biggest obstacle facing you and how can i remove it,” I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual. And hey, that might work, your teammate might have an insight you’re missing. But then, if they do have that insight, you’ve volunteered to do a shitload of work for your team.…

>>When I, a manager, ask “what is the biggest obstacle facing you and how can i remove it,” I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual.

That gets a bit circular. In my mind, "asking my team members" is THE number one method of "identifying blockers for my team". Think about it - if a manager didn't ask for input from their team members, and instead assumed they can identify blockers, on their own and in vacuum, how would we portray such a manager? :-)

>> ive never had a manager that was willing to actually do the work when they asked the questions on this list

That is indeed the crucial second part; works for anything though - whether it's "lessons learned" at the end of the project, or "requirements gathering" from the client/user-base, or "soliciting feedback" from team members - obtaining information is critical #1 step; only useful if you then action it.

Just because both effective and ineffective, willing and unwilling managers ask questions, doesn't make questions themselves bad. It does depend on the actual manager and the relationship they have with a team member.

So I'd say such questions are "necessary but not sufficient" criteria for managerial success, and having a list is similarly "useful but not sufficient" :)

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#32

Post by rcarmo »

I looked at these and had immediate flashbacks of Eliza. Given the recent (hopefully by now tempered) enthusiasm for chatbots, this might be a great starting point for one...

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#33

Post by hk__2 »

stephc_int13 wrote: post #18
cek wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wow, you are either a troll or clueless. There is no more powerful form of ensuring manager/employee alignment than 1:1 meetings.

I've co-founded companies, I've led teams and been CEO of a small video game studio. As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. I think it is very easy to shoot yourself in the foot with feedback, this is a difficult art. And I think the best strategy is to use feedback only to deal with outliers, ie exceptional or catastrophic achievements.

> As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings.

How do you collect feedback then?

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#34

Post by pvorb »

stephc_int13 wrote: post #18
cek wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wow, you are either a troll or clueless. There is no more powerful form of ensuring manager/employee alignment than 1:1 meetings.

I've co-founded companies, I've led teams and been CEO of a small video game studio. As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. I think it is very easy to shoot yourself in the foot with feedback, this is a difficult art. And I think the best strategy is to use feedback only to deal with outliers, ie exceptional or catastrophic achievements.

I think it's important to give feedback to employees that behave like you'd expect, too. Otherwise they might wonder if they are doing something wrong and change their behavior.

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#35

Post by Slikey »

awakeasleep wrote: post #23

Many of these will come off as frustrating and manipulative. When I, a manager, ask “what is the biggest obstacle facing you and how can i remove it,” I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual. And hey, that might work, your teammate might have an insight you’re missing. But then, if they do have that insight, you’ve volunteered to do a shitload of work for your team.…

I can only imagine the horror of working in a team where obstacles are not communicated immediately and have to wait for such meetings. This screams in inefficiency and frustration. The job of the manager should be to implement a culture of open feedback and actively resolve obstacles as they come up. Most of these questions come straight out of the waterfall playbook.

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#36

Post by marcinzm »

awakeasleep wrote: post #23

Many of these will come off as frustrating and manipulative. When I, a manager, ask “what is the biggest obstacle facing you and how can i remove it,” I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual. And hey, that might work, your teammate might have an insight you’re missing. But then, if they do have that insight, you’ve volunteered to do a shitload of work for your team.…

>I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual.

As I see it, the individual who is doing the work will always have more insight into the work than an external third party. They may not be able to put that insight into context or a coherent narrative but they have it. The worst managers I've had are ones who think they know the work when they don't because they no longer do it.

There is also a difference between identifying blockers and promising to remove them. Promises are dangerous and promises you aren't guaranteed to keep are lethal.

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#37

Post by scarface74 »

artsyca wrote: post #28
helij wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As a manager as well as a human being I am interested in my co-workers and how they feel, their family, etc. so I don't really 'get' your negativity. Can you point some of the bullcrap on the list. There might be a way to rephrase some of the questions to make them not bullcrap. I think 1on1 is great. I was at the receiving end and now at giving end. When I did 1on1 with my manager I always felt good afterwards but I…

The very idea that there are two ends is your fallacy bro you are already putting yourself in the magnanimous role of giving something A 1:1 is inherently a meeting of minds where there is no power imbalance and genuine trust can develop The way you make it sound is like the CIA giving mandatory lie detector tests where one person is strapped to a chair and the other is taking notes I'm calling false corporate bullsh…

There is always a power imbalance between a subordinate and a manager. There is no “genuine trust” with a manager. If your manager was told that their were imminent layoffs and they were told not to tell you, do you think they would?

Would you tell your manager that you are hoping to learn all you can to get a better paying job in a year?

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#38

Post by Insanity »

stephc_int13 wrote: post #18
cek wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wow, you are either a troll or clueless. There is no more powerful form of ensuring manager/employee alignment than 1:1 meetings.

I've co-founded companies, I've led teams and been CEO of a small video game studio. As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. I think it is very easy to shoot yourself in the foot with feedback, this is a difficult art. And I think the best strategy is to use feedback only to deal with outliers, ie exceptional or catastrophic achievements.

I've worked for managers that did and didn't do 1:1 meetings. At some places I've missed them - because the managers were out of touch with the team.

In other places where there were no 1:1 but a lot of 'hallway conversations' that seemed to replace them. So they had an 'finger on the pulse' of the team. That was pretty great - because of how informal it was and it worked.

I've also had great 1:1s though. So YMMV I guess, but it's hard to generalize. I think a lot depends on the company culture - some companies might benefit from them while others don't. There's no golden rule.

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#39

Post by TrueGeek »

awakeasleep wrote: post #23

Many of these will come off as frustrating and manipulative. When I, a manager, ask “what is the biggest obstacle facing you and how can i remove it,” I’m offloading the manager-level work of identifying blockers for my team on the individual. And hey, that might work, your teammate might have an insight you’re missing. But then, if they do have that insight, you’ve volunteered to do a shitload of work for your team.…

I had a manager who did 1 on 1s and asked questions like these. If you told him a blocker he’d do whatever it took to unblock it. In turn I only told him I was stuck when I truly was, because I knew the work he’d put in if I brought it to him. Of course, he knew status of stuff I was working on that wasn’t blocking me.

He knew my wife and kids names, my hobbies, and even paid for dinner for my local bicycling club when we were training for a big event.

When he left the job completely changed. My job satisfaction plummeted with the new manager (who didn’t do 1 on 1s at all) and I left soon after.

Re: 1-on-1 meeting questions

#40

Post by scarface74 »

stephc_int13 wrote: post #27
helij wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As a manager as well as a human being I am interested in my co-workers and how they feel, their family, etc. so I don't really 'get' your negativity. Can you point some of the bullcrap on the list. There might be a way to rephrase some of the questions to make them not bullcrap. I think 1on1 is great. I was at the receiving end and now at giving end. When I did 1on1 with my manager I always felt good afterwards but I…

As a manager as well as a human being, you shouldn't have to ask those questions during a 1:1, the well being of your team should be something you're observing from the inside. And, more importantly, you should not delegate the responsibility of flagging it when something is wrong. You should know without asking.

No as an employee the last thing I want is to constantly having to read between the lines. Just be up front and tell me about issues.
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