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Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

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Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#71
post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Do you have a wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend? Are you tied down to anything? Do you have money to travel? I'm going to assume you're a single male between the age of 25 and 35. Correct on all counts -- nothing tying me down, and my rainy day fund can keep me fed, clothed, and sheltered for years. I actually get a decent amount of exercise -- minimum 40 minutes per day, I'd estimate. It certainly has plenty of bene…

> but the energy seems to evaporate once I get down in front of my keyboard again. The internet is a great tool to avoid self-reflection. Generally, if something saps your energy whenever you use it, that's a good sign to use it less. > I think my mindset is holding me back. Only one person can change this, and it ain't any of us on HN :) > It's almost like I would be doing with the expectation that this would "fix"…

The internet is a great tool to avoid self-reflection.

Ow. That hurt. (But thanks, I'll definitely use that quote in the future!)

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#72
post #64

I'd recommend you travel. You write "I could travel, but my problems will just follow me around the world." So I re-read your post, but you don't really tell us what your problems are. So, what's the problem, really?

Maybe I didn't say so explicitly, but it should be clear that I suffer from a lack of motivation and direction, and really have a lack of faith in myself.

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#73
Retire early and often is my motto. I've now been through my third (fourth?) sabbatical. My advice: keep yourself busy but allow for spontaneity, you don't have to pack it all into one sabbatical, and multitask in your actions (i.e. you can choose activities and locations that fulfill several fun things you've been meaning to try). Realize that it's not a picnic and even if you sit at home it's going to be tough; you don't go through personal growth without some pain.

For ideas (and possibly even inspiration) of what might be possible in a few sabbaticals: I took a year in Denmark between high school and college, learned Danish, how to paint, and toured Germany with an orchestra playing the clarinet (which I had also just learned). I also developed a taste in music by going through an entire library's worth of records in alphabetical order among other adventures, including backpacking on my own for some months.

I took a year between my undergrad and my Master's, in which I worked for a software project I was passionate about, traveled the Middle East, taught programming in Jerusalem to Palestinian high school students, and studied Arabic and Topology at Harvard.

I took a year between my Master's and beginning my PhD, in which I worked as an astronomer in Switzerland, founded a startup in the bay area, and did a ridiculous amount of traveling stateside.

In addition I've taken a few month(s) here and there... moved to the Arctic to work for a startup, to Egypt to scuba dive and study Arabic, etc.

Think positive and big! Best of luck in your adventures! BTW I am not rich or independently wealthy, just was very creative out of necessity at finding external funding sources. All of the above were self-financed in this manner.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#74
I have read the great suggestions written so far - exercise, travel, etc. Great, I hope something hits the mark.

I have two things to suggest. I hope they help. If I'm being blunt, I apologise.

1. Simplify your thinking.

If you have a habit of overly abstract thought, you can make problems more complicated than they need to be. You could say it's a bit like spiritual java programming.

For instance, aims such as "become a virtuoso musician" don't mean anything. They lack concreteness. "become ascetic monk on mountain top". Also intangible.

You say you recognise them as daydreaming. But your whole way of thinking is daydreaming - "What I think ..", "What I fear ...", "doom", "failure". All abstract daydreaming. Do something about it. Stop daydreaming.

Make a promise to yourself: you will reject thoughts that don't have a tangible aspect you can act on immediately. They are tiring you. Let your brain rest awhile. And if you have to think about problems, think about other peoples' problems not your own.

That means real, tangible people. It could be anyone. This is not a moral injunction. It's practical - if you look to see how you can help other people it requires empathy and if you develop empathy you start to see other patterns of thought. It may help you see different ways of thinking and get you out of your rut.

Only think a few days in advance. Reject all thoughts of the future for a while.

2. Tone down the ambition.

You imagine a virtuouso musician or some epic bike journey, some massive startup. Therefore anything you actually you do seems crap in comparison - attempts noodling on the piano or going for a small bike ride around the neighbourhood seem silly. Trivial. Pointless. Why bother? Stop comparing yourself and your life to your daydreams (see point 1).

I write this because this is what helped me. Please ignore it if it doesn't feel right.

Best of luck, I wish you all the best.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#75
post #29

have you tried yoga? Especially Bikram Yoga. I find that this amazing practice can fix almost anything physically and mentally.

I agree, my husband started yoga classes after I've nagged him to get active and he's now in much better metal and physical shape. It's an amazing difference, he's calmer, happier, and looking good, too. Plus it's the one thing he really looks forward to during his free time. I personally think any form of exercise is a good way to decompress.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#76
post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but the energy seems to evaporate once I get down in front of my keyboard again. The internet is a great tool to avoid self-reflection. Generally, if something saps your energy whenever you use it, that's a good sign to use it less. > I think my mindset is holding me back. Only one person can change this, and it ain't any of us on HN :) > It's almost like I would be doing with the expectation that this would "fix"…

The internet is a great tool to avoid self-reflection. Ow. That hurt. (But thanks, I'll definitely use that quote in the future!)

Not disagreeing with the original point, but will offer another possibility: If you aren't well, it's easy to zone out in front of the computer. I have done lots and lots of this while very sick. I do less of it now that I am healthier. (If you are smart and not really well, the internet is a good way to get some of the mental stimulation you crave when you are too out of it to go get more of a life.) And if your keyboard is not clean enough, this can sap your energy. I wipe my keyboard down when I first get to work and we wipe our keyboards down repeatedly at home before someone gets on it. For me, this makes a difference in ability to focus and not simply zone out. Getting rid of an older, dirtier computer and getting a brand new one also has meant that I spend a lot less time mindlessly piddling on the internet.

Peace and good luck.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#77
Travel. Explore yourself and the world. Meet new people, learn their culture.Learn new languages. Eat new cuisines. Read other religions. See documentaries. Watch old classics. Join an art class. Exercise. Do something out of your comfort zone

Do NOT do anything remotely close to your profession, there more to life than picking up a new programming language to learn.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#79
Right now, I am reading "The Importance of Living" by Lin Yutang and this is one of points that he was trying to get across. There is no point in striving to do something, our best moments in life are those when we are just loafing and doing nothing in particular.

Re: Ask HN: Burned out. How can I make the most of a sabbatical leave?

#80
"I'm not ready for a new job or project -- I'm in no shape to work. I could travel, but my problems will just follow me around the world. I could volunteer, but I'm so emotionally empty that there's no heart for me to pour anywhere."

One thing that might help here is to understand that motivation generally follows action. If you wait until you feel motivated to do something you might end up waiting a long time, or until some external pressure forces you, or you will fall into the trap of only doing things that give you immediate pleasures. So once you've taken care of your immediate physical needs, make some kind of longer term goal - do that bike ride, do some charity work, start a small project, it can be anything but do something.

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