I'd say this is spot on, particularly the part about going to college for lifestyle reasons, combined with a field that is low-paying, and a choice of uni that isn't particularly cheap, is a bad combination.
I'm not sure I agree on grad school, perhaps you could elaborate? It's true that it's very much hit or miss. But my experience is that there's plenty of grad schools which offer 1 - 1.5 year Masters' and tuition fees that aren't abnormal. Here too your second point rings true, either you pay a lot of money for a good rep (e.g. if you go into BigLaw, assuming you don't burn out, it gives a high return rate), or you pay little for a no-name university, and then I feel grad school absolutely does come at a premium. Compared to a 3-4 year Bachelor's degree, it's usually a relatively quick program with potentially bigger upside, especially if paid for by your employer.
I think what most students underestimate is just how many of them fail to finish the standard path. Almost half of students don't finish their bachelor's within six years due to delays and changing paths, and a lot of them quit entirely. I think college makes sense if you know what you're looking to study, why, are dedicated to completing it, and able to.
A lot of students go into fields of study as a teenager, literally never having had a 5 minute conversation with a person actually working in the field, having spent no time looking at the income tables, or indeed not actually considering the field at all, but just wanting to become a college student. It's these students who probably drag down the stats quite a lot. I've seen fairly unimpressive people go into a business course, work their ass off, do various internships, and land high-paying jobs. And I've seen smart kids start the same business course, muck around, graduate after 6-7 years and land a mediocre job that doesn't really require any particular degree. At the end of the day the student is still the most important factor here, and by the time they head to college, it's often already 'too late' for institutions to turn an B student into an A student, without the intrinsic motivation. There's lots more room in primary/secondary school for that, that's really where it's at. What college you head to after is less important in my opinion.