Live data from Hacker News

Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

nytimes.com

321–330 of 361 posts

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#321
post #266

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sex trafficking is not consenting adults. There is a significant difference between a sex worker who voluntarily engages in their profession vs. people who are forced into it.

> Sex trafficking is not consenting adults By the dictionary defintion, this is true. If you look at what gets called "sex trafficking" in the media, by politicians, by police and prosecutors, and in some cases, by the legal system, this is not true. One common definition is anyone who travelled across state (or country) lines has been trafficked, which is a bit like saying anyone who moves to SF for a tech job is a…

I don't like the term "trafficking" for this reason. We have better terms, and criminal charges available for people who force or pressure someone into sex work against their will, including slavery, rape, and coercion.

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#323

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, commenter you're responding to is basically saying "to get a coding job, you'll need to look through dozens of job sites, prepare for interviews, fail a bunch, keep up-to-date on your skills, take informational interviews, and heavily work personal connections." Unless you're a standout prodigy, in which case people will message your LinkedIn begging you to consider interviewing for six-figure positions.

The problem is you want a coding job, which requires lots of preparation and perhaps talent. Getting a job flipping burgers is much easier - you just have to show up. but everyone wants the coding jobs ;-)

just b urself ;)

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#324
post #218

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's possible, but in my experience, there is someone for everyone. I suppose if the goal is to hit way above your weight, paying makes sense. Money does seem to have that effect on women. But if you have that much, you should be able to pull it easily without prostitution?

> It's possible, but in my experience, there is someone for everyone. lol citation needed. I've used dating apps for the last four years. I've gotten maybe 3-4 dates per year, and 0 relationships out of it.

That really sucks. I moved and have spent some time working on my profiles, so I'll share my advice if you want it. I usually get 7 or 8 likes per week, usually 1-2 that I'm interested in talking to, and usually go on a date with a new person every couple of weeks.

First advice, pay for the premium service on the apps. I know it's not cheap, but being able to see who liked you is a huge gain. I've had very little success getting matches otherwise unless I was going to spend way too much time swiping. And it's still drastically cheaper than a match maker.

Secondly, when writing your profile and choosing pictures, you want to make choices based on the women looking at your profile's perspective. Does he look good? Does he seem interesting? Do we have things to talk about? Share some interesting bits about your life that women might find interesting and want to ask you about. Have you gone anywhere cool lately? Have you picked up any interesting hobbies? (But stay away from esoteric stuff. Database design is cool, but very few people will get it). Maybe you cooked something really cool and exotic for dinner the other day.

Don't try to be overly impressive. If you want to look fancy, have selfies of yourself before you went to an event in a suit, or maybe at the event. Make sure the focus is on you, instead of the event/car/house/whatever. But it can always be in the background. Trying to be overly impressive comes off one dimensional, like you aren't interesting other than puffing yourself up. Showing that you're doing well and are a well adjusted, successful person is good, you just have to make sure it's a facet of your profile instead of a focus.

Make sure you keep your standards reasonable. We would all love to date a neuroscientist who's a lingerie model in her spare time. Those women are exceedingly rare, and even rarer on dating apps. They probably don't need a dating app to keep a full dance card. Swiping really screws up your perspective of what the dating pool looks like. Your feed is always full of absurdly attractive women, but keep in mind that a lot of those are fake profiles.

Lastly, make sure you iterate. Take the dates you can get, even if they're not perfect to you. Maybe they're better than you thought; if not, use it as a learning experience. What did they like about you? What didn't they? You can use that feedback to adjust your profile and how you communicate to make yourself more appealing. Plus, going on dates is pretty much universally fun, so there isn't much to lose!

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#325
post #289

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed, I'm usually more careful to distinguish legalization and decriminalization. Marijuana is however legal in Canada.

Marijuana is still illegal in USA.

Well, not federally, I guess it's an opinion question re: how you feel about states rights.

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#326

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Tinder (and presumably, dating apps in general) are in reality likely horrible for actually meeting people [1] [2]. [1] https://theoutline.com/post/3402/tinder-is-not-actually-for-... [2] https://theoutline.com/post/3711/the-tinder-struggle-visuali...

In my experience, I had better luck than he did, though not by orders of magnitude. 3,000 swipes per date seems high. I'd guess it's closer to 1,000. But he makes it sound like deathly drudgery, and I think that's missing the point. It's "gamified" to give you bits of positive feedback. Matching feels good, like a little compliment. One doesn't have to enjoy that; not every game is for everybody. And the process itse…

The fact of the matter in Tinder for men is: if you aren't a 9.5 or 10, your chances quickly approach zero. Let a sister or female friend swipe for you sometime and watch how literally any small and random thing is an excuse to swipe left. Women have the freedom to be picky on dating apps, and they absolutely are.

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#327
I mean that was the intention, was it not? A full discussion of our incoherent approach to work, sex, sex work, morality, patriarchal power dynamics, and so forth is out of scope here but it was never about making material improvements to anybody’s life.

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#328

Earlier quoted context omitted.

the metric I use is mutually consenting? Do both parties consent to the agreement? Then it should be legal. Do I consent to trade XXX for YYY with a company or other individual? Does the company/individual consent to trade YYY for XXX? I don't consent to murder, rape, or kidnapping of myself, nor do I consent to do those to others.

Unfortunately this doesn't take into account some nuances. For example: A homeless, jobless woman who engages in acts of prostitution simply to eat is consenting technically, but most would say this situation shouldn't exist. But marriages do happen all the time for economic reasons...

Well yes obviously that situation shouldn't exist, though I feel like the correct way to avoid it is to provide aid to those in need to stop her being that desperate in the first place.

Because if she is so desperate as to do do it solely to avoid starvation she would do it regardless of whether or not it was legal

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#329

As an occasional consumer of sex work, here is the reality: yes, It’s more dangerous now for both parties, but much more so for the women. The labor supply has gone down sharply because the economics went upside down. If you can’t count on as many clients per day the fixed cost of the hotel room becomes harder to risk so many girls exited the market. Prices have gone up sharply. The kind of girls that were charging $…

Just to satisfy my own curiosity, what is your use case for paying for sex? Married? High powered executive? I can't imagine paying for something that is easily free on a million different dating apps.

"Easily free" is a gross overstatement. If you are a guy, and you don't have good social skills or intuition, and you don't pay attention to your looks, you will have zero luck. Those apps are heavily skewed towards female choice due to the safety and a much higher demand for sex on the male side for a number of reasons.

And before you say that anyone should be able to do that, not everyone has the same supply of emotional energy for self betterment, which is an extra on top of what is required to live life day to day

Re: Stamping Out Online Sex Trafficking May Have Pushed It Underground

#330

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Why are we concerning ourselves with how people pleasure themselves in private? It's disgusting. Because "legalizing it" doesn't stop sex trafficking or sexual exploitation, in fact all evidences point to the contrary, it increases sex slavery. https://nordicmodelnow.org/2019/12/17/the-child-sexual-abuse... ?

The article paints a sad picture ...although your conclusion seems far fetched. Even marriage can be made into paid rape by the wordings of that article. AFAIK ... decriminalization allows for 1. The sex worker to approach authorities without any fear of prosecution. 2. To set up freelance sex work without pimps and brothels. There shouldn't be a debate about this. Criminalization makes things worse at the expense of…

Even if the sex work is legalized and regulated, you still have a much higher demand than supply, which is what creates the human trafficking problem.
Post reply on HN