Having Kids

Yep i was there. Picked up bike commuting to work because it replaced time driving, not required more time. I also started drawing because you can do it in short spurts, and you can do it anywhere.

The time commitment has changed for me but not quite enough where i can sit for hours and code something outside of work. My kids are 5 and 7

The words "may" and "probably" seem to indicate these statements are not facts, and may probably not apply to everyone.

This is likely not a problem pg has, but becoming a parent can provide an ambition to provide for them and have enough success to be able to spend time with them.

I didn't even know Paul Graham had kids. I don't recall them playing much of a part in his business, his essays, his creations, etc.

So how exactly does that show the biggest problem you have with kids?

Alternately, for some reason you laser-focus on the topic for some reason and you can't help but let it fill the entirety of your perception. This appears in Facebook a lot where people complain about baby pictures or anecdotes and somehow ignore the 99.99% of absolutely irrelevant inanity that the rest of their feed is ("Oh you ate at a restaurant...wowwweeeee"). It happens in loud restaurants when people filter out enormous volumes of ambient sound to focus on the sounds of a child sixty feet away. When someone has some sort of hangup about children, it's amazing how large it can appear in their perspective.

From watching nature with a dispassionate eye, you would tend to get the idea that the meaning and purpose of life is nothing more than reproduction, i.e. making more life. Well, why would it be different for humans, other than the exquisite vanity of our wanting it to be different? Our wanting the universe to be governed by a god who looks like us, for example. Our wanting to be "happy" or "fulfilled" and so on. No, we're basically animals, just mentally a bit more complicated. So I think our lives are pretty much all about reproduction too, but with an overlay of "meaning" that is completely arbitrary. Your life can be about reproduction if you want, or it can be meaningless, or it can be filled with whatever meaning you want to fill it with (i.e. make up from whole cloth, or borrow from the collective). I find this freeing, because it puts me in control, but your mileage may vary.

Anyway, my challenge to everyone here is to try and unify the pre- and post-children mindsets. The stuff you're interested in doing before you have kids might be the same stuff that later interests you about your kids. Take the statement, "Shoot, I have kids, so I can't go out anymore." Well why were you "going out?" Was it "to meet people?" That's kind of just code for "meeting sex partners" and don't tell me this is not at least in the back of your mind, hovering near the threshold of consciousness (if not an explicit goal). And well, you know what sex is for. It's not so you can have a good time; it's what evolution uses to trick you into making more humans.

When you're attracted to someone, you're really just assessing them and deeming them reproductively fit. Those traits might include a fit body indicating health/robustness; a nice face indicating (studies have shown) the person is near the average of the gene pool and therefore carrying tried-and-true genetic material; a personality that indicates a good chance they would behave kindly toward any offspring; and an intellect that shows they could solve any problems that come up.

Working with computers or doing any other challenging mental problem, playing an instrument, having a bunch of money (or things that cost a lot of money), doing feats of daring like base-jumping or whatnot, all of these are ways of displaying your fitness for mating. Before some of them became "occupations" you could earn "money" with, they would've been used for solving problems to protect or feed or clothe (etc.) the village or tribe and its progeny. (Not base-jumping specifically, but challenging oneself with risky feats of daring, and coming out on top, that does prove something about your courage and skill, which would at the very least be useful in hunting or defense.)

School and all childhood learning are preparation for mating, or for learning one of the above preparations for mating, or for "being an adult" which equals mating. Interestingly some of that involves sheltering the child from mating concerns, which is consistent with how we train noobs everywhere. We don't be givin' you the source code for the compiler during the "Write your first hello world" tutorial, for example.

Life is meaningless, or it's about mating, or it's about whatever bullshit you want. Have a nice day!