Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017) • Hacker News Board

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#101

Post by ddspider » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:28 PM UTC

dsego wrote: post #97

riskneutral wrote: post #80

I used to feel this way, then I discovered meditation and now I am almost always in a positive state of mind. In my experience, it is depressed people who are not seeing realistically, and they are caught in cycles of mental delusion. Happiness achieved in this way is just about truly accepting the "depressing" realities and being okay with it all including your own depressing reactions to the realities, and then not…

Is this akin to or different from dissociation and/or depersonalization? Because I don't want that coping mechanism, feeling and experiencing things is better.

I had a bout of depersonalization for a year and became a regular meditator much later. I didn't find that they were at all similar.

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#102

Post by rtkaratekid » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:32 PM UTC

I'm not so depressed these days (thankfully) but this "realism" does tend to manifest is different ways. I'm very self-conscious about not dragging people down because some thoughts that I think daily that are normal for me, seem to be absolutely psychologically crippling for people who previously hadn't, or didn't want to think such things.

Usually when I do express these thoughts they're in the form of semi-dark humor ("You don't like the boss? Don't worry, you'll only have to deal with him for a couple more years (because you won't quit) and then the company will go under and you'll have to work somewhere else with a similar boss"). The humor is to mostly try to diffuse how harsh these statements can seem to others, and because I find them legitimately morosely funny, but for some reason I tend not to get laughter when I say them... So I try to keep this "depressive realism" to myself most of the time.

I promise I have social skills. That's probably my biggest consistent faux pas. But sometimes I wonder why I can lose friends so fast by just saying things that are true or are very likely to be true. I guess a lot of people don't like to see that clearly? I don't know.

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#103

Post by bashwizard » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:32 PM UTC

In other words: water is still wet.

The world is a shitty place, deal with it.

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#104

Post by WhiteSage » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:33 PM UTC

kypro wrote: post #82

I don't think it's the case that all depressed people are realists, but that realists in general may be more predisposed to depression or being depressed. It seems likely some people suffering from depression have real mental illness, and a much much smaller number of people are ultra realists and get depressed over real negative events and facts. I know there have been times in my life where I have suffered from dep…

I'm sorry for your loss.

When something bad happens I often find myself going back to Carl Sagan's words on the Pale Blue Dot [0]. Puts everything in perspective, and makes everything feel insignificant, when compared with the vastness of what lies out there.

[0] https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wupToqz1e2g

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#105

Post by serverholic » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:33 PM UTC

acollins1331 wrote: post #87

riskneutral wrote: post #80

I used to feel this way, then I discovered meditation and now I am almost always in a positive state of mind. In my experience, it is depressed people who are not seeing realistically, and they are caught in cycles of mental delusion. Happiness achieved in this way is just about truly accepting the "depressing" realities and being okay with it all including your own depressing reactions to the realities, and then not…

This. There are lots of bad things in the world that do happen. Maybe more bad then good. You have one life to live and sitting around being depressed or angry about them is just a waste of time.

Wow how did I not think of that before! Just don't be depressed. It's so easy!

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#106

Post by mfoy_ » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:33 PM UTC

mellowdream wrote: post #57

mirimir wrote: post #18

That seems reasonable to me. I've often found optimism in others to be foolish. And for bipolar me, extreme optimism is a sign of hypomania. But there's a lot more to depression than seeing the world realistically. There's a tendency to feel inadequate, hopeless and disempowered. And there's more to that than seeing oneself and ones capabilities realistically. One aspect is failing to break out huge problems into man…

From my own experience I'd agree with this - I can feel down, certainly, but I'm nowhere near the non-functioning, clinically depressed state I was in for 4 years a few years back. I don't think the "realistic" vision I had of "the world" has really changed, just the attitude: I'm still "stupid as f*ck" and observing "person X I knew in high school totally has such a better life than I do" - but now, it's about inter…

What a humdinger of a Table of Contents...

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#107

Post by Kye » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:33 PM UTC

pknopf wrote: post #95

People may think I'm depressed, but I'm the polar opposite. I'm always discussing what it means to be depressed, only in an effort to find what is the will to live. I find it interesting. "When driving on the interstate, each driver has the power, with the flick of a wrist, to end it all. But they don't. Why not? What prevents people from flicking? What's worth living for?" My wife wants me to stop talking like that,…

There's a comic somewhere depicting the two views of nihilism.

One frame is all dreary and dark with the caption "Nothing really matters" over a sad character. The other is happy and upbeat with flowers and rainbows over the same, much happier character with the same caption.

It sounds like you lean more toward the latter and choose to make your own meaning rather than embrace one of the common sources of meaning.

That's how I try to see the world. I don't understand how people find meaning in traditional sources like religion, family, or work, so I set out to find my own. Nonjudgmentally, of course. I respect the classics even if I favor avant-garde purposecraft.

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#108

Post by hippich » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:37 PM UTC

kypro wrote: post #82

I don't think it's the case that all depressed people are realists, but that realists in general may be more predisposed to depression or being depressed. It seems likely some people suffering from depression have real mental illness, and a much much smaller number of people are ultra realists and get depressed over real negative events and facts. I know there have been times in my life where I have suffered from dep…

Sorry about your loss =(

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#109

Post by megous » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:37 PM UTC

kharak wrote: post #55

wolfgke wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Could it be that people who see the world Realistically, get depressed? This fits my experience quite well. To give a software development analogy: The more you learn about deep, esoteric details of various parts of computers (i.e. you get to see computers more realistically than idealized), the more depressed you get about the current state of software development. And yes, late at night, I often work privately on…

Could you give an example? What's depressing about the current world of software?

For me it's the amount of bloat and too many levels of not so good abstraction. It's not really depressing yet, but more irritating to me. And I take it as an opportunity.

Re: Depressed People See the World More Realistically (2017)

#110

Post by ZitchDog » Wed, Oct 16, 2019, 1:39 PM UTC

riskneutral wrote: post #80

I used to feel this way, then I discovered meditation and now I am almost always in a positive state of mind. In my experience, it is depressed people who are not seeing realistically, and they are caught in cycles of mental delusion. Happiness achieved in this way is just about truly accepting the "depressing" realities and being okay with it all including your own depressing reactions to the realities, and then not…

I had a very different and difficult experience with depression and meditation. Meditation highlighted the depression / anxiety and made me very aware of it, which made me feel the pain very clearly and deeply. It was like watching my brain stab itself repeatedly for hours on end. Meditation + SSRI is a great combination for me.