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Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

nytimes.com

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Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#251

Post by nmnim »

dfraser992 wrote: post #225
cubano wrote: post #139

Does anyone here have any experience with the Psych On Demand-type services that promise professional therapy like LARKR or Talkspace and the like? $85 for 50 minutes seems quite reasonable and I have been wanting to try it but wanted to hear from other tech professionals before paying the money I barely have. I know I could use use therapy, although the fabulous graduate-level textbook I once read that I believe nai…

You should find this interesting/useful as well: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Bowlby I have Bowlby's books as well, so can recommend them. Based on my experience, any therapist ought to be able to offer a reduced rate - the first session or at least inquiry can be used to establish such things. And I'd recommend trying to see someone in person vs. over the Net, if…

He also might be thinking of Mary Ainsworth who was an early attachment theorist with John Bowlby? Although not German.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#252

Post by mistersquid »

jonfw wrote: post #117
danenania wrote: post #100

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Great comment and kudos to you, but a couple thoughts on the following: “Eliminate things from your life that don’t bring you joy and happiness.” I see this sentiment a lot in the techie self-help sphere, along with corrolaries like “ruthlessly eliminate negative people”. While I understand the motivation and agree it is true up to a point, it can also lead to a shallow and avoidant approach to life if you get carrie…

> “Eliminate things from your life that don’t bring you joy and happiness.” The key here is to have a long-term view of this. Obviously this doesn't mean to disown your relationships with anybody who didn't bring you joy this week, but you should look at the history of the relationship, and how you think the relationship will be in the future, and decide whether or not the relationship is really a value add in your l…

The idea of eliminating negativity is problematic because, sometimes, relationships that are the most challenging are also ones that end providing fulfillment and personal growth.

Outcomes are often impossible to predict in advance because you just can't know which relationships will end up challenging you in ways that help you grow. Also, you and your circumstances will change and those changes will affect the nature and affect of your relationships.

I'm not saying one should cannot or should not make decisions about who to keep close in one's personal life. I am saying, however, that predictions about the future value of any personal relationship is as likely to be mistaken as correct.

I don't think relationships should be about maximizing one's potential, whatever "maximizing" may mean. Relationships are important and so is happiness, but I don't think relationships should be cultivated and curated in the service of maximum happiness.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#253

Post by tunesmith »

andai wrote: post #142
danenania wrote: post #100

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Great comment and kudos to you, but a couple thoughts on the following: “Eliminate things from your life that don’t bring you joy and happiness.” I see this sentiment a lot in the techie self-help sphere, along with corrolaries like “ruthlessly eliminate negative people”. While I understand the motivation and agree it is true up to a point, it can also lead to a shallow and avoidant approach to life if you get carrie…

Re: Ruthlessly eliminate negative people I'm undoubtedly the most negative person in my life.

Easier to change yourself than change someone else!

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#255

Post by [deleted] »

csours wrote: post #156

My primary motivation is learning things and doing things the right way. In tech, I feel like I will never know everything, and in fact I never know "enough" - there's always some little setting or error or gremlin that will get me. Thus I can't do things the "right way" because my programs will break. This is a source of great anxiety for me. Yes I know there are software principles that help with this like KISS and…

[deleted]

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#256

Post by notacoward »

I wonder how many anxious NYT workers are going to therapy. No, seriously. All that stuff about "bummed out by the world and their role in it" certainly applies to them as well, plus probably more economic anxiety. We're destroying their business, not the other way around. And they don't get the perks we do either.

People of many occupations are probably seeking out therapy more, for the same reasons. I wouldn't single tech out, unless I happened to be obsessively focused on writing about everything that might be wrong with tech.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#257

Post by Bootwizard »

agota wrote: post #237
Bootwizard wrote: post #112

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not a writer so I'll let you know when it happens. It may be years from now, but I'm steadily working on it! :) I'll check out Mindset, thanks. (I couldn't find it on google, send a link if you don't mind)

You should create a landing page so that people who are interested in the book could subscribe and get updates.

I was thinking of making it a blog because that's kind of how I've been writing it for myself.

And then organizing and compiling it into a book.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#258

Post by dlphn___xyz »

taurath wrote: post #199
dlphn___xyz wrote: post #34

the workers arent the problem and therapy isnt the answer - workers shouldn’t feel afraid to set boundaries to prevent being exploited or abused.

Therapy can help you recognize and set boundaries.

you dont need therapy to know your own personal limits. you also shouldn't take advice from someone who doesn't have a stake in your success (i.e. win or lose you're still a patient)

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#259

Post by rblion »

mikelyons wrote: post #203
rblion wrote: post #87

Seven ayahuasca ceremonies and two bufo ceremonies over the course of 2 years changed my life. I experienced a paradigm shift and healed a lot of repressed trauma, let go of a lot of internal drama. I feel I got to the root of the issue and built a solid foundation upon mindfulness and compassion. Every day I work to train my mind to be one-pointed while keeping my heart open towards all, even those who wish me harm.…

I've had this same positive life transformation from ~30 psilocybin experiences over the last 15 years, combined with meditation and lots of other spiritual / psychological work, which culminated with a "heroic" mushroom experience that caused transformation for me this year. Anybody who has limited experience with psychedelics can greatly benefit from just learning about them, this two part video gives you all you n…

If used with pure intentions, entheogens/psychedelics are medicine. It's sad that so many just see them as recreational drugs. It's only a matter of time now until mainstream society accepts this truth that indigenous people and the mystically-inclined already know.

I started out with psilocybin in 2009 when I was 19. Over the course of the last decade, I dove deep into EVERYTHING from Antiquity to the Renaissance to the Counterculture. I feel psychedelics helped me synthesize so many different aspects of STEAM fields in a meaningful and practical way.

Meditation and gratitude keep me child-like, I can't even put it into words really. It's just something that has to be experienced to be understood, I'm sure you know what I mean!

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#260

Post by tomhoward »

AnIdiotOnTheNet wrote: post #131
mindsetalex wrote: post #122

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It’s often hard to know if you need you need help, it’s why we go to a doctor for a checkup - it’s equally important to focus on your mental health as your physical health.

I would say you shouldn't go to a doctor either unless you actually need treatment for something.

Yet there are all kinds of things that people do while they’re well in order to stay well - regular exercise, good diet, adequate sleep etc.

And routine checks on basic indicators like blood pressure and cholesterol are part of conventional health advice, particularly as people age, in order to identify and respond to problems early, before they become much more severe and difficult to treat.

Equivalent preemptive/preventative treatment for mental health is less understood/available.

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