Live data from Hacker News

We Have Ruined Childhood

nytimes.com

261–270 of 505 posts

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#261

I am a parent of two boys—ages 7 and 4–and I hardly recognize the negative forces that this author laments over because my wife and I have simply chosen not to raise our kids that way. When my boys get home, we get outside and do sports. We’re in the middle of (tackle) football season right now and that’s what my 7 year-old does five days a week for two hours every evening. It’s exercise, fun, camaraderie, and lesson…

> For much of this, we have over-involved, over-concerned mothers to thank (and a bunch of dads that think like moms). What a hateful, sexist notion to put in the middle of an otherwise articulate comment.

"Hateful" is such a corny overused word these days. Childish exaggeration.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#262
post #41

This seems to also be fear mongering as for example teen suicide is still down from the early 90’s. https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/66/wr/mm6630a6.htm Things are different, but that does not always mean they are worse.

Wow. Males are triple the rate of females.

That’s similar for adults. If you look at the number of suicide attempts the difference diminishes however. A possible reason for this is guys tend to use methods of suicide that have low rates of failure (eg guns) while women tend to use methods that leave open a window where you can be saved (eg pills). Why that is I don’t know but I suppose women on average have a more social nature and don’t want to leave behind a huge physical mess for others to clean up, but that’s pure speculation on my side

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#263
post #257

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was teaching in a low level public high school. To be fair, the entrance exam system is complicated and I don't fully understand all of the details, but I'll try to elaborate some more. Essentially you are allowed to apply for 1 public and 1 private high school. Unlike most places in the west, public high schools still cost money in Japan. It's quite expensive: something like $1000 per student per month. However, t…

Yes, countryside area, teenager (my niece, not daughter) went back to Tokyo for high school because, indeed, she is aiming at something else than cashier at a kombini or waiter in a restaurant (which is what her brother did after failing university) Japan is a country with the highest amount of bullshit jobs I have seen. I will agree happily that it is better than the homelessness that seems rampant in countries with…

Cheers for that. I don't have kids, so I was going on what friends told me they spent. It's easy to get those things wrong.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#264

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don’t know where the line is, but I think I would sooner pull my kids out to homeschool than have them be further traumatized/militarized by letting them participate in active shooter drills. It’s insane and will be a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more you expose kids to this kind of lifestyle, the more it becomes... part of their lifestyle.

Yeah, look how utterly ruined we were because we had nuclear bomb drills(!) and earthquake drills.

What, you don’t recall the rash of school earthquakings children did after those drills became commonplace? All the nuclear mail bombings?

Oh that’s right, people can’t cause earthquakes and nuclear bombs are a bit tricky to make. Whereas there are millions of guns circulating right now and even toddlers manage to off themselves with them at a nonzero rate.

I’m a gun supporting liberal, and I say something is wrong with our culture.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#265
post #196

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am not sure how old you are but everything seemed to change when abducted children were put on milk cartons in the mid 1980s. Before that, kids roamed free. I tell my foreign friends that kids used to run the streets in America and they can hardly believe it. The funny thing is that the danger of "stranger abductions" has been over blown. Most abductions are non-custodial parents.

Which countries still allow children to grow up free?

I live in India, and the children are relatively free to do whatever they want

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#266

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> We use crayons and paper, but I don't think that's so intrinsically better than an iPad. Maybe not intrinsically, but what I see kids doing handheld computers at restaurants (and sitting in a cart at the grocery store, and getting pushed around town in a stroller, and on public transit, and sitting in their car seats, and at the playground, and at the airport, and on the plane, and at the doctor’s office, and waiti…

>and I can only assume at home too This is the whole thing. Don't assume that. When my kids are at home they're inventing elaborate games to play with eachother. When we're in public somewhere where they don't want to be, they're doing whatever gets us through peacefully.

I should be clearer. My point in that sentence was that what I observe kids doing with iPads is not drawing or writing or coding or making music or reading books or ..., which might be meaningfully comparable to drawing with crayons. Almost everything I see is games and videos, and I am not an expert or super careful observer but it seems like the tendency is toward games and videos that require little thinking and are designed to be maximally addictive.

I don’t mean that every kid who is sitting on the subway with an iPad also spends every moment at home doing the same.

But some of them unfortunately do spend lots of time at home glued to screens. I have multiple friends whose older kids have serious problems with TV, video game, social media, etc. habits, which start crowding out many other activities, with the parents not really knowing what to do about it because they don’t want to have a fight every day.

And some young kids who might not be on their video / game machine at home are doing it a lot in contexts where kids would have in the past either been engaged with the world or entertaining themselves. There is a vast difference between a 3-year-old riding around in a stroller looking at a smartphone vs. a 3-year-old walking around on their own feet looking at the world and talking to the adults walking with them.

These devices seem fine to break out occasionally when the parent desperately needs a break from demands on their attention. But there are kids using these devices for extended periods every day.

P.S. The same goes for adults: people should trade their smartphones for a book or a conversation with the person next to them or just some daydreaming from time to time.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#267

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I remember meeting a young French dude that camped his way around Japan, even in the cities. In my home city in the US, you couldn't even walk in downtown after dark.

This is going too far. I've lived and spent time in various USA cities: LA, Chicago, Boston, Dallas, Denver, etc. I never had any difficulty walking downtown after dark.

I dont know about Boston or Dallas, but in LA and Chicago there are definetly areas downtown you should not walk around, especially LA.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#268

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> For much of this, we have over-involved, over-concerned mothers to thank (and a bunch of dads that think like moms). What a hateful, sexist notion to put in the middle of an otherwise articulate comment.

"Hateful" is such a corny overused word these days. Childish exaggeration.

It's not an exaggeration. Try reading through the article this person recommended for another interesting perspective on mothers and girls.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#269
post #79

> I'm so glad I was able to grow up in the (sadly last) "be home for dinner, be back by dark" generation. Hey I'm old too. We played Lawn Jarts--the ones with the points on them. We rode in cars without seatbelts. We bike rode without helmets. Played tackle football without equipment on the frozen ground. We played Hardball at 6. And we Fought with each other. When I was 7 some older kid took my ball; my mom said "Yo…

Your first paragraph made me laugh. I'm that old too. We also regularly rode in the bed of pickup trucks, especially coming home from a baseball game. Playground equipment today is very different. No merry-go-round, see-saws, monkey bars, etc. Even the swing sets are not always there.

Check out some newer playgrounds. Now that they have this soft rubbery ground, all the "dangerous" stuff is back! :-) I live within walking distance of two different parks that have all four of what you named, in San Francisco.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#270
post #223

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Homicide isn't even in the top 10 ways to die in the US. The students are in more danger from drowning, by a wide margin, than any school shooting. https://www.cdc.gov/homeandrecreationalsafety/water-safety/w...

In Australia at least this is an area we are getting worse at ( https://lsv.com.au/research/water-competency-of-victorian-ch... ). 3 out of 5 fail the current standard of swimming continuously for 50 meters at the end of primary school. The standard has dropped too, ~25 years ago when I was tested the standard was 200 meters and most of the "training" happened in unstructured time.

That's disappointing. I feel like being able to swim and handle ocean surf is a "birthright" of Aussie kids. I remember being taken out in fairly big crashing surf as young as 5 and 6 years old by my parents so I could learn how to handle it (dive under breaking waves, judge currents, etc).

I would guess the trend is not so bad in Queensland. One thing that is very impressive here is the number of pools in schools, including public schools, and the very, very active swim programs that go with them. Brisbane probably has one of the best swimming cultures in the world (backed up by the number of swimmming champions that have come from here).

Post reply on HN