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We Have Ruined Childhood

nytimes.com

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Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#141

Post by esotericn »

jklp wrote: post #137
esotericn wrote: post #2

Is this exclusive to childhood? It feels to me, though this could well be a socio-economic bubble thing, that people are just scrambling everywhere. Hyperfocused on something; anything. Maybe it's their career; maybe it's their cause; whatever. But the innocence of just living, existing; hanging out in this beautiful world we call home; seems to be fading for many. Happiness must be now, not future, otherwise future…

I have an XKCD bookmarked for this exact thing - with quotes as far back as 1871 about how modern life is just too hectic https://xkcd.com/1227/ Notable quotes such as: > It is, unfortunately, one of the chief characteristics of modern business to be always in a hurry. In olden times it was different. -- The Medical Record, 1884 > If we teach the children how to play and encourage them in their sports ... instead of…

Game, set, and match.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#142

Post by jessaustin »

wallace_f wrote: post #110
shioyama wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Completely agree, cars are the main thing that worry me as well (in the city).

I remember meeting a young French dude that camped his way around Japan, even in the cities. In my home city in the US, you couldn't even walk in downtown after dark.

This is going too far. I've lived and spent time in various USA cities: LA, Chicago, Boston, Dallas, Denver, etc. I never had any difficulty walking downtown after dark.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#143

Post by knolax »

diminoten wrote: post #106
chrissnell wrote: post #97

I am a parent of two boys—ages 7 and 4–and I hardly recognize the negative forces that this author laments over because my wife and I have simply chosen not to raise our kids that way. When my boys get home, we get outside and do sports. We’re in the middle of (tackle) football season right now and that’s what my 7 year-old does five days a week for two hours every evening. It’s exercise, fun, camaraderie, and lesson…

Great, and now your kid isn't going to be as well versed as their peers in the technology that drives literally everything. They'll be left behind as the kids who were allowed to grow/learn using modern tools fly past them. You can't win. Everyone damages their children, stop pretending like you're some kind of exception. Additionally, this nostalgic "My childhood was great these kids don't get what I had" is bullshi…

Elementary school these days actually put a lot of focus into making sure kids are used to the basic mechanics of using computers (typing, mouse-clicking etc...), which is all you're gonna at that age anyways.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#144

Post by pessimizer »

fzeroracer wrote: post #87
FillardMillmore wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Compared to whites in that time period, sure. The raising of kids seems to me to be a multifaceted issue. One interesting example: most would agree that having two parents in a household is better for raising kids. In the early 20th century, despite racism and segregation, black divorce rates and birth outside of wedlock was much lower than it is for blacks today. Of course, those rates have gone up for all races ove…

Yes, but the point is that the era we tend to romanticize the most with 'free range parenting' tended to be something exclusive to white and/or affluent parents. Black children didn't really have that luxury at the time considering the systemic racism they encountered every step of the way. As a poor white kid when I grew up my parents didn't have the luxury to let me do my own thing because they were often out fishi…

I sympathize with your intent, but when I was a poorish, urban black kid (30-40 years ago) we were completely free range. I was raised by a single mother who didn't even make it home from work until 7:30-8:00 (like many), and my range was anywhere within a mile or so of my house from probably about 12 years old on.

It wasn't a luxury to be unsupervised... the black people I knew growing up didn't really have a culture of oversupervision to rebel against. We were expected to be able to handle ourselves.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#145

Post by diminoten »

chrissnell wrote: post #134
diminoten wrote: post #106

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Great, and now your kid isn't going to be as well versed as their peers in the technology that drives literally everything. They'll be left behind as the kids who were allowed to grow/learn using modern tools fly past them. You can't win. Everyone damages their children, stop pretending like you're some kind of exception. Additionally, this nostalgic "My childhood was great these kids don't get what I had" is bullshi…

I’m not sure why you’re being down voted because you are breaking any rules as far as I can tell, but I must say: after reading your comment, I feel very sorry for you. We only get one chance at life and I want my kids to spend it being happy and fulfilled, doing things they love. I see no reason to prepare them for being Silicon Valley wage slaves at ages 4 and 7. Even if they did want that for themselves, they don’…

You seem to believe there is only one way of happily living, and thank goodness it's the way you were raised!

How entirely fortunate for you and now your children, and fie on those who might believe there is some way to incorporate the last 30+ years of technology into raising happy children.

I genuinely feel bad for your kids, because they're not going to get the kind of upbringing they could have had where a healthy relationship with the actual world is fostered and encouraged. Instead they're stuck living in this pretend universe where computers are evil and responsible management of their time and attention is taken care of for them.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#147

Post by wingspar »

api wrote: post #121
Rotdhizon wrote: post #83

Seems like society is constantly pushing to remove all the ways in which kids used to live. Can't just wonder around and play on the sidewalks or the streets anymore with your friends, someone will call the police on you. Can't hang out in the woods, as those have mostly been torn down to make way for new neighborhoods, and the woods that do remain are typically private property. Unless you are lucky enough to live i…

> The 24/7 fear cycle of news has drilled it into so many peoples minds that if you see someone anywhere on your street outside, they are there to murder, rob, mutilate, or otherwise commit crime. Join NextDoor.com if you want a dose of how nuts people have gone. I live in Orange County CA and I have checked it from time to time. Apparently this place is a crime infested jungle full of human trafficking gangs that ab…

Do you think the paranoia leads to lower crime, via vigilance and reporting? And/or does the actual crime lead to ‘acceptance’ as displayed in the Anaheim boards?

Perhaps a manifestation of the broken windows theory? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broken_windows_theory

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#148

Post by gitrebase »

jessaustin wrote: post #142
wallace_f wrote: post #110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I remember meeting a young French dude that camped his way around Japan, even in the cities. In my home city in the US, you couldn't even walk in downtown after dark.

This is going too far. I've lived and spent time in various USA cities: LA, Chicago, Boston, Dallas, Denver, etc. I never had any difficulty walking downtown after dark.

You are talking about very large cities only. How about most of the U.S. with smaller cities and towns?

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#149

Post by dang »

diminoten wrote: post #145
chrissnell wrote: post #134

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’m not sure why you’re being down voted because you are breaking any rules as far as I can tell, but I must say: after reading your comment, I feel very sorry for you. We only get one chance at life and I want my kids to spend it being happy and fulfilled, doing things they love. I see no reason to prepare them for being Silicon Valley wage slaves at ages 4 and 7. Even if they did want that for themselves, they don’…

You seem to believe there is only one way of happily living, and thank goodness it's the way you were raised! How entirely fortunate for you and now your children, and fie on those who might believe there is some way to incorporate the last 30+ years of technology into raising happy children. I genuinely feel bad for your kids, because they're not going to get the kind of upbringing they could have had where a health…

You're crossing into personal attack. That's not cool. Please stop.

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#150

Post by [deleted] »

tptacek wrote: post #4

Does this feel to anyone else like a lengthy characterization of a very particular time/place of 20th century child rearing? And, if it does, is there a reason to believe that we got parenting exactly right in, what, American circa 1950-1970, after starkly different parenting norms both before and after?

[deleted]
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