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We Have Ruined Childhood

nytimes.com

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Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#201

Post by Semaphor »

shioyama wrote: post #38
protomyth wrote: post #5

Well, if you report 24x7 hate and danger, scare the crap out of people, and report that there is danger behind every tree, then yes, childhoods are ruined. Things are getting safer and the only way you would know it is go look at the CDC stats. Kids need time with their friends away from parents. I'm so glad I was able to grow up in the (sadly last) "be home for dinner, be back by dark" generation.

> Kids need time with their friends away from parents. I'm so glad I was able to grow up in the (sadly last) "be home for dinner, be back by dark" generation. Completely agree with your comment, but "sadly last" here is not accurate unless you're talking about North America and maybe Europe. I live in Japan and it's quite normal, even in a big city like Tokyo, to let kids play on their own until it gets dark. I feel…

> and (I hear) Europe as well

From what I’ve seen in Germany, not much seems to have changed since I was a kid.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#202

Post by rabidrat »

jklp wrote: post #137
esotericn wrote: post #2

Is this exclusive to childhood? It feels to me, though this could well be a socio-economic bubble thing, that people are just scrambling everywhere. Hyperfocused on something; anything. Maybe it's their career; maybe it's their cause; whatever. But the innocence of just living, existing; hanging out in this beautiful world we call home; seems to be fading for many. Happiness must be now, not future, otherwise future…

I have an XKCD bookmarked for this exact thing - with quotes as far back as 1871 about how modern life is just too hectic https://xkcd.com/1227/ Notable quotes such as: > It is, unfortunately, one of the chief characteristics of modern business to be always in a hurry. In olden times it was different. -- The Medical Record, 1884 > If we teach the children how to play and encourage them in their sports ... instead of…

I wonder if there are any quotes like this from before the Industrial Revolution.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#203

Post by [deleted] »

shioyama wrote: post #101
dragonsh wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well Seoul, Hong Kong, Taipei, Singapore, Beijing, Shanghai are similar when it comes to kid going out. But the childhood is still under siege in these places by constant pressure to excel with lots of extra curricular classes. My close friends kids in Tokyo, Seoul, Hong Kong, Singapore, Taipei, Shanghai and Beijing spend most of their time in extra tutoring or music or painting or dance classes or something else whe…

> My close friends kids in Tokyo, Seoul, Hong Kong, Singapore, Taipei, Shanghai and Beijing spend most of their time in extra tutoring or music or painting or dance classes or something else where they have to excel. Of course this happens, but let me return to my point: it's perfectly normal to see a 5-year-old in the park on their own (here in Japan). In the U.S., the parent would be arrested . Don't try to convinc…

[deleted]

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#204

Post by Gibbon1 »

Semaphor wrote: post #201
shioyama wrote: post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Kids need time with their friends away from parents. I'm so glad I was able to grow up in the (sadly last) "be home for dinner, be back by dark" generation. Completely agree with your comment, but "sadly last" here is not accurate unless you're talking about North America and maybe Europe. I live in Japan and it's quite normal, even in a big city like Tokyo, to let kids play on their own until it gets dark. I feel…

> and (I hear) Europe as well From what I’ve seen in Germany, not much seems to have changed since I was a kid.

Some French lady ten years ago got into a big mess because she parked her stroller out in front of a coffee shop and went inside. Cops and CPS took her baby away for a couple of weeks/months.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#205

Post by Noos »

rangibaby wrote: post #177
mactrey wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Kids in Japan lead carefree "be home by dark" lives up until late middle school and high school, when they start studying 4+hrs/day and sleeping <5hrs/night to prep for standardized tests. I don't think Japan is a horrific dystopia for teens but it's hardly the "let kids be kids" culture that America of yesteryear (apparently) was.

> Kids in Japan lead carefree "be home by dark" lives up until late middle school and high school, when they start studying 4+hrs/day and sleeping I think that time of Japanese kids' life is actually when they are the most free, they can goof off and do pretty much whatever they want as long inside and outside of school and no one will bother them (parents and teachers likewise), as long as their test scores are OK,…

Actually from what i read, it's not childhood..it's college.

Once they are in college, they've made it. It's over. And college in general is not as vital as in the usa, because the Japanese hire the person not the projects or the knowledge. College is a breather between cram hell and salaried life.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#206

Post by diddid »

chrissnell wrote: post #97

I am a parent of two boys—ages 7 and 4–and I hardly recognize the negative forces that this author laments over because my wife and I have simply chosen not to raise our kids that way. When my boys get home, we get outside and do sports. We’re in the middle of (tackle) football season right now and that’s what my 7 year-old does five days a week for two hours every evening. It’s exercise, fun, camaraderie, and lesson…

We are the same way almost minus the 10 hours a week of football, that sounds horrible to me. Even if my kids wanted to do that I don’t think I’d let them, but I guess it is summer. My parents kept me out of organized team sports until middle school and I have never felt I missed out, athletically or socially. I am all for pickup games though.

For screen time I found that YouTube gave my kids the worst attitude, so even when we go on vacation all they get is Netflix.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#207

Post by w-ll »

jklp wrote: post #137
esotericn wrote: post #2

Is this exclusive to childhood? It feels to me, though this could well be a socio-economic bubble thing, that people are just scrambling everywhere. Hyperfocused on something; anything. Maybe it's their career; maybe it's their cause; whatever. But the innocence of just living, existing; hanging out in this beautiful world we call home; seems to be fading for many. Happiness must be now, not future, otherwise future…

I have an XKCD bookmarked for this exact thing - with quotes as far back as 1871 about how modern life is just too hectic https://xkcd.com/1227/ Notable quotes such as: > It is, unfortunately, one of the chief characteristics of modern business to be always in a hurry. In olden times it was different. -- The Medical Record, 1884 > If we teach the children how to play and encourage them in their sports ... instead of…

Thanks, I haven't seen this one yet.

> There never was an age in which so many people were able to write badly.

cracked me up

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#208

Post by kingkawn »

Nothing is ruined. The thing discussed here is belief that without ruining kids they will not be competitive. This seems a false belief; how can ruining childhood life help them? So nothing is ruined. Do it better. Not so hard.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#209

Post by Nasrudith »

lonelappde wrote: post #151
api wrote: post #112

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's a pure creation of the media, which has spent the better part of 50 years terrifying parents with panic after panic. The reality is that crime is much lower today and yet we are more afraid of crime than ever.

In the past,. being victimized by crime was expected. Now it's prevented. That's progress.

If there was any actual causal connection between the fear and safety sure. Instead it was irrational from both directions of not caring in the past about things like stupidly dangerous 50s toys to freaking out about kids playing in backyards unsupervised.

Ironically safety of children seems to be the complete opposite of the direction of the 'increased safety boosts risk taking'. When children have a higher rate of mortality they tolerate risks more but when there is a lower one they become more paranoid. I suspect the reason why is that most people have a terrible innate sense of statistics and probability - as shown by the success of gambling institutions like Las Vegas and the lotto.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#210

Post by sgustard »

rayiner wrote: post #91
germinalphrase wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Look - I'm sure you can find some outlier news article about this happening, but as someone who actually has professional contact with CPS once in a while, this is - in my opinion - wildly hyperbolic. The social workers I know who work for CPS have excessive work loads of really intense circumstances (like, children being preyed upon, beaten, chained to radiators...). They're not doing parent interviews because someo…

It’s not hyperbole. It’s happened twice recently in Montgomery County, a DC suburb near me: https://patch.com/maryland/silverspring/mother-free-range-ki... . (It’s one reason we moves two counties over.)

You moved because something happened twice in a county with a population over 1 million?

I'm just trying to process the irony of this entire discussion. American kids are over-protected because the media has created a culture of fear that terrible things are constantly happening to kids. Now you're going to flip that hysteria around and apply it to the parents.

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