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When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

theferrett.com

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Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#41

Post by xvfz »

jdoliner wrote: post #31

This article gets close to the heart of flat-earthism, bad sadly doesn't quite take the plunge over the edge. The origin of flat-eartherism is people like this author, and his wife's need to convince others that they are wrong in their beliefs and get them in line with the correct beliefs. It's hard to remember at this point, but think back to about 15 years ago, the idea of a flat-earth was held up as the shining ex…

You might like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rE3j_RHkqJc

It makes life a lot more pleasant when you realize that most upsetting things you see online are just a meme symbiotic system with a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#42

Post by phil248 »

Maximus9000 wrote: post #7

> "And if it was just flat-earthers, I’d say fine, it’s harmless. But you’ve got anti-vaxxers and Men’s Rights Advocates and anti-global warming folks and TERFs and incels out there, all fueled by one central pivot point of humanity – namely, that it’s lonely being wrong." It seems quite odd that he lumps "Mens rights advocates" in there. Are they crazy?

Are you familiar with the men's rights movement? The term or concept of "men's rights" could certainly be discussed in a neutral, non-crazy way. But the actual movement as it exists today and the logic that commonly defines it is absolutely as detached from reality as any of those other cult-like ideologies.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#43

Post by phil248 »

lopmotr wrote: post #34
Maximus9000 wrote: post #7

> "And if it was just flat-earthers, I’d say fine, it’s harmless. But you’ve got anti-vaxxers and Men’s Rights Advocates and anti-global warming folks and TERFs and incels out there, all fueled by one central pivot point of humanity – namely, that it’s lonely being wrong." It seems quite odd that he lumps "Mens rights advocates" in there. Are they crazy?

None of MRAs, TERFs, or Incels should be listed there. They don't hold beliefs about nature that can be judged as wrong. They just want things. But the author is apparently too entrenched in his political camp to see the difference between "enemy" and "wrong".

The article is not about judging a belief right or wrong on any scientific basis, it's about the phenomenon of people sidelining logic in exchange for inclusion.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#44

Post by phil248 »

RickS wrote: post #29

I lost my dad to this. So far, nothing helps. I have no idea what the solution is. It only works when THEY want out. But why would they? We're brutally, brutally mean to people like this. Every time somebody dunks on a flat earther or their ilk, puts somebody down to defend the superiority of their own worldview, they've added a brick to the wall that keeps these people from feeling like they can rejoin society. The…

It can't always just be about being nice, unfortunately. Parents who choose not to vaccinate their children could get us all killed. It's a serious threat.

If being nice turns out to be the best strategy for curbing this movement, then I am all for it. If screaming in their faces about it turns out to be more effective, then we have to do that.

I would love for everyone to be able to "rejoin society" but at a certain point we also have to defend society against those who reject it in harmful ways. Not every illogical cult-like community is as harmless as flat-Earthers.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#45

Post by brandonfro »

RobertRoberts wrote: post #24
brandonfro wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It probably comes from the fact that “Men’s rights activists” are somewhat extreme considering men have dominated every aspect of society (e.g. politics, religion, sports, etc.). The idea of “Men’s rights” seems redundant to most people in my estimation.

Are you suggesting men don't have the right to stand up against abuse?

I am not

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#46

Post by neom »

hackits wrote: post #38
neom wrote: post #5

As an egocentric self-righteous narcissist who spent their 20s making friends by being "right", I'm slowly starting to learn that isn't a fun way to live. I think it's the same thing as when someone you care about is "complaining", you don't always have to help them solve the problem, sometimes they just want to talk.

There is a fine line as most people don't have very good conversation skill's and will use you as a surrogate to a psychologist. You have to pull them in line with eye contact and silence and then giving them the benefit of the doubt, and finally have to say they're in a conversation/discussion. If that all else fails then you leave the conversation.

I totally agree. I also think there is a huge selfishness in allowing yourself to be used as a surrogate to a psychologist. Just because you are lonely due to not figuring out the other things yourself, doesn't mean you should play doctor to feel fulfilled.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#47

Post by bigiain »

arkh wrote: post #21
brandonfro wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It probably comes from the fact that “Men’s rights activists” are somewhat extreme considering men have dominated every aspect of society (e.g. politics, religion, sports, etc.). The idea of “Men’s rights” seems redundant to most people in my estimation.

> considering men have dominated every aspect of society Some men. And a minority of them.

#notallmen

:sigh:

Way way too many of us, and way too few of us who call them on it. "The standard you walk past, is the standard you accept."

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#48

Post by david38 »

The author appears to lump anyone of opposing views together.

Flat earth - trivial to disprove, ok Anti-vacation - not trivial, but a huge amount of work has been done to show anyone who isn’t totally shut down the glaring before/after situation of vaccines, so ok

Men’s Rights? Seriously? Is the author saying men have no rights? Some of the things that fall under the men’s rights umbrella are the draft, lack of help for homeless men vs women, biased family court, little recognition when a victim of domestic violence (interestingly the CDC recognizes that), biased prison sentences, vastly higher rates of on the job injuries, etc.

So is the author saying anything that happens to a man his own fault?

Is there a specific men’s rights subgroup the author is referring to that’s very loud and just goes around saying men never do anything bad?

This is like saying “civil rights” people are a bunch of angry people with no reason to be angry.

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#49

Post by s09dfhks »

RickS wrote: post #29

I lost my dad to this. So far, nothing helps. I have no idea what the solution is. It only works when THEY want out. But why would they? We're brutally, brutally mean to people like this. Every time somebody dunks on a flat earther or their ilk, puts somebody down to defend the superiority of their own worldview, they've added a brick to the wall that keeps these people from feeling like they can rejoin society. The…

Very well put, and I love your use of "dunking"

Re: When Having Friends Is More Alluring Than Being Right

#50

Post by yters »

phil248 wrote: post #44
RickS wrote: post #29

I lost my dad to this. So far, nothing helps. I have no idea what the solution is. It only works when THEY want out. But why would they? We're brutally, brutally mean to people like this. Every time somebody dunks on a flat earther or their ilk, puts somebody down to defend the superiority of their own worldview, they've added a brick to the wall that keeps these people from feeling like they can rejoin society. The…

It can't always just be about being nice, unfortunately. Parents who choose not to vaccinate their children could get us all killed. It's a serious threat. If being nice turns out to be the best strategy for curbing this movement, then I am all for it. If screaming in their faces about it turns out to be more effective, then we have to do that. I would love for everyone to be able to "rejoin society" but at a certain…

What we could do is set up special camps to help these poor misguided souls. The camps would concentrate all the ignorant people into one group so that they can be more efficiently dealt with.
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