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I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

nytimes.com

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Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#351

Post by AstralStorm »

barry-cotter wrote: post #79
Dayshine wrote: post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's 1am so you get the first result I found. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S027795360... Let me know if you don't have access to the journal. That's 2-3 times increased chance of measurable mental health problems if parents work outside of 9-5

The long run effects of adoption on personality attributes and IQ is indistinguishable from zero. People are as like their biological siblings whether they ever meet them or not, and as like their adoptive siblings as any random stranger. Outside major abuse and genetic contributions parents have limited effects on adult outcomes. If the worst parents working more does to children is a less happy childhood on average…

You missed the rampant socialising and tribalism in your description of school.

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#352

Post by axiom92 »

14 wrote: post #190
MRD85 wrote: post #14

I made the opposite choice. I'm a single father and I've prioritised my children over my career. I'm not going to pretend it's an amazing lifestyle. If you're intellectually driven then looking after two young children isn't fascinating. However, I love them and they rely on me. I made a choice to bring them into the world and I'm not going to neglect them. I have the kids more than their mother does, and I also pay…

I have worked in health care for 15 years primarily taking care of elderly. The biggest message basically they all make is to not let time pass you by when you are young and to enjoy the time with your kids when they are young. Because before you know it they grow up and it’s never the same. I am a single dad as well. I too sacrificed my career so they got the time they needed. My love life is non existent also but I…

> When we get to our death beds our kids will be at our sides and there will be no doubt you and I made the correct choice.

Is that guaranteed though?

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#353

Post by Jare »

krageon wrote: post #330
Jare wrote: post #138

Earlier quoted context omitted.

But it wasn't just about mankind making it to the moon. It was about getting there "before the bad guys". About making a show of willpower. About proving that no sacrifice is too large.

> About proving that no sacrifice is too large. I would posit that this mindset is broadly a disease and not a cure.

It totally is a disease

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#354

Post by hollerith »

krageon wrote: post #330
Jare wrote: post #138

Earlier quoted context omitted.

But it wasn't just about mankind making it to the moon. It was about getting there "before the bad guys". About making a show of willpower. About proving that no sacrifice is too large.

> About proving that no sacrifice is too large. I would posit that this mindset is broadly a disease and not a cure.

Any yet if Britain and France had made more of a show of willpower in 1937 then Germany probably would've decided against starting WWII and about 28 million lives would've been saved.

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#355

Post by noisy_boy »

lonelappde wrote: post #238
noisy_boy wrote: post #215

Kids are not kids forever. People feel like they have infinite time when they are young/in their prime. They don't and it is too late by the time the realization dawns in. By then, they have grown and moved out and that work which feels so intellectually stimulating/meaningful now does not necessarily feel the same way then. I love programming and that is why I got into my choice of career. However, that program I sp…

This is the fallacy of regret. No matter what you do, you can regret what you didn't do

I have never seen anyone regret not spending more time in office instead. I'll take my chances with ungrateful kids than having missed the chance of spending more time with them.

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#356

Post by strooper »

MRD85 wrote: post #14

I made the opposite choice. I'm a single father and I've prioritised my children over my career. I'm not going to pretend it's an amazing lifestyle. If you're intellectually driven then looking after two young children isn't fascinating. However, I love them and they rely on me. I made a choice to bring them into the world and I'm not going to neglect them. I have the kids more than their mother does, and I also pay…

> If you're intellectually driven then looking after two young children isn't fascinating. However, I love them and they rely on me.

I feel you. My wife and I are managing two kids and I work from home, meaning I am home almost 24x7. I help my wife taking care of our children and I often get annoyed by the whole bunch of dumb or repetitive things we need to do to take care of them. Still, I love them more than anything in the world.

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#357

Post by therealdrag0 »

lonelappde wrote: post #225
a-saleh wrote: post #212

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That happens like 10% of the time if you are lucky. Rest of it can be kinda monotonous? Like, getting my daughter from bed through breakfast, dressing up, and walking to kindergarten. Or getting her to walk all the way to her friends house for a play date. Or getting her dinner, showered, and to bed ... I still like it, but the day to day is stressful and monotonous

A paying job is usually stressful and mnotonotous and the main upside is the salary.

I donno. I love my paying job. I find it generally very stimulating.

Re: I’ve Picked My Job over My Kids

#358

Post by jjeaff »

ativzzz wrote: post #345
jjeaff wrote: post #319

Earlier quoted context omitted.

After spending some time working with machine learning and AI, the early development of the human brain is just fascinating to me. With our best algorithms, you have to feed thousands and thousands of images for ML to be able to identify things like a certain type of animal. And yet, my 14 month old can see a cartoon drawing of a penguin in her books a few times and then days later, recognize an actual photo of a pen…

You also have to remember that our brains have millions of years of evolution to learn from, so we have had far more than thousands and thousands of images and other perceptions recognized by the DNA of our ancestors, which gets passed down to us.

Yes, but that's the programming. There aren't any penguin references in the DNA that we know of yet.
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