Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Benefits of talking to strangers

bbc.co.uk

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

31–40 of 76 posts

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#31

Post by LandR »

ptah wrote: post #8

maybe that is only the case in chicago. I would find it immensely irritating if some stranger tried talking to me beyond "hello"

Yep. I find my big on-ear headphones are a good "I don't want to talk to anyone" indicator :)

I basically never leave the house without them. I think if you tried talking to random strangers where I live most people would think you are a weirdo / creep. I don't think it would go well.

Never mind if it's a cross sexes conversation. A guy trying to make friendly conversation with a woman could go very south, quickly.

I work in a shared office / tech hub and you don't see people from different companies talking to each other at all really. In fact it can be quite humourous seeing how awkward it is if two people try to use the kitchen area, both trying to get their kitchening done without acknowleding the existence of the other, apart from the occasional "sorry" as they get in each others way.

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#33

Post by res0nat0r »

jamesmp98 wrote: post #28
vorpalhex wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

A compliment or a question is usually a good way to start. "Oh hey, nice shirt, have you seen that band in person?"

lol I went to a local music venue a few weeks back and tried this. After inquiring about one guys shirt, he started at me for a few seconds like I was insane and turned around

If someone at a concert acts like you've insulted them by asking about their music related shirt, then the problem is with them, not you.

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#35

Post by failrate »

ptah wrote: post #8

maybe that is only the case in chicago. I would find it immensely irritating if some stranger tried talking to me beyond "hello"

It depends on where you are in Chicago. Riding public transit or walking in downtown? Leave everyone alone. Most other places? Give it a shot.

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#36

Post by Adamantcheese »

codyb wrote: post #14

I’m in San Francisco for work and yesterday an elderly man made a comment about the heat outside of a Walgreens. I didn’t really have much to do, and I really enjoy walking around San Francisco with it’s beautiful light pastel palette, rolling hills, and masonry so we walked and walked for about 3 hours. I was a bit tired by the end, and his story was a bit sad at times but when we finally departed I’d learned a trem…

Sonder: https://www.dictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/post/23536922667/...

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#38

Post by therockspush »

ptah wrote: post #8

maybe that is only the case in chicago. I would find it immensely irritating if some stranger tried talking to me beyond "hello"

I was in chicago last week riding the L to the airport. One of the doors broke, and a maintenance worker came on to tell everyone to use the other door.

There were 10 more stops to the airport.

At every one someone tried to exit using the broken door. At first it was funny because they not only didn't hear the worker explain it, but also didn't notice the 5 people at the last stop who just did the same thing.

I started telling people as I saw them try to approach the door, but the look on everyones face was "who is this creep trying to talk to me right now".

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#39

Post by HSJuniper »

This has been the largest personal growth I've experienced in my lifetime and it has been a direct result of living a city that is walkable.

Before moving to San Francisco I hated talking to strangers and I would rarely engage in more than a few words with anyone on the street or in stores. Now I find myself cherishing small moments of conversation that occur in Ubers, on the MUNI, at communal tables in restaurants and in random interactions on the street, even with the homeless who I try my best to not ignore and treat like real people.

I can't believe the difference it has made in my mood, my feelings about this city and my general mood. Like so many things in life it's hard to know what exactly caused the shift in my behavior but it's brought me an incredible amount of happiness and deepened my appreciation of where I live.

Re: Benefits of talking to strangers

#40

Post by drenvuk »

ucosty wrote: post #30

I find the only strangers who ever try to talk to me in public are the ones who want something. This means I'm always suspicious of people who approach me, and have an aversion to being seen as the same.

Your worries about being seen as the same are silly, people can usually tell whether you want something from them a few sentences in and after that a pleasant conversation is usually in progress. It's worth it to strike up conversations with randoms. On the elevator one time I had a fun talk with an optical engineer about detecting methane leakages with lasers and whether it had applications in space.

How often do you get to enjoy that?

Post reply on HN