If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed • Hacker News Board

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#211

Post by kevin_thibedeau » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:51 PM UTC

magduf wrote: post #135

kingsloi wrote: post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You actually hit it nail on the head. I'm a British guy who married an American woman and I've been in the US about 3 years now. I live in Gary, IN (the nice beach community, south of Lake Michigan) but the I hear the daily horror stories of things that occur here. I doesn't bother me too much, I think shit happens everywhere and we're good people (as in, we're not looking for trouble), and I was raised to have my gu…

I've seen YouTube videos of American expats coming back home and saying the one big thing they noticed, after spending significant time in someplace like Europe, was how utterly paranoid Americas are. I've felt this myself just after having a short vacation out of the country. It's not really unsafe here (unless you're in downtown Baltimore or Detroit or something), but everyone is just so paranoid that it feels like…

American public schools are fine if you live where they aren't hollowed out by a weak tax base.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#212

Post by sk5t » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:52 PM UTC

kevin_thibedeau wrote: post #211

magduf wrote: post #135

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've seen YouTube videos of American expats coming back home and saying the one big thing they noticed, after spending significant time in someplace like Europe, was how utterly paranoid Americas are. I've felt this myself just after having a short vacation out of the country. It's not really unsafe here (unless you're in downtown Baltimore or Detroit or something), but everyone is just so paranoid that it feels like…

American public schools are fine if you live where they aren't hollowed out by a weak tax base.

A weak tax base and/or nonparticipatory parents would do it.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#213

Post by kelvin0 » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:53 PM UTC

albertgoeswoof wrote: post #118

kelvin0 wrote: post #100

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think smaddox makes a good point, I don't get the downvotes. https://www.reddit.com/r/Stoicism/comments/9eaqqt/what_we_ca... "The first is that some things are within our control and some are not, and that much of our unhappiness is caused by thinking that we can control things that, in fact, we can’t." You choose to change your mental 'model' and re-frame your perspective (not to be confused with burying your head…

Downvotes are probably related to Jordan Peterson

Really? I did not realize he was shunned on HN.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#214

Post by Tomte » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:53 PM UTC

There is another aspect that may sound ludicrous, but I think also plays a role: If I go to the doctor and say I may have depression because I'm angry and vindictive, he may dismiss me not as a depressive, but as an asshole.

Mental health is hard, in part because you can diagnose[1] it even less than many physical ailments.

I have a cut on my finger and I can't stop the bleeding and OMG all the blood? Emergency room! (And please don't ask how long I pondered whether I should go, because it's not exactly a big wound).

My leg isn't looking straight and it hurts like hell? Call an ambulance!

I don't feel well? What now?

[1] I don't mean come to a definitive diagnosis what illness this is in Latin medical terms, but a simple answer to "is something wrong – and sufficiently wrong to see a doctor?"

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#215

Post by decasteve » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:54 PM UTC

seancoleman wrote: post #206

It took me years to recognize that irritability and anger were actually latent side effects of coffee consumption, and related to increased anxiety. I'm curious, has anyone else experienced this and found success with cutting out caffeine?

I have. But only if I overdo it. Red bull triggers an irritability in me. Too much coffee too. A cup or two of coffee during the day doesn’t.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#216

Post by tabtab » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 7:57 PM UTC

sjjshzvuiajhz wrote: post #203

tabtab wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm willing to share my reasoning and logic with anybody who asks, and will refine it if it lacks clarity. I enjoy having my logic tuned by other minds; it makes me even MORE logical to be challenged, even if it hurts my pride in the short-term. Others are not so open and don't want their thinking process challenged. I don't know why, other than pride, ego, or office politics. If you know why, please tell me. Don't b…

We’ve never met, but from what you’ve said in this thread, it sounds like you have a low opinion of the people around you. You’re good at finding flaws. That’s a valuable skill, but when you direct that fault-finding toward other people, they will become defensive. It’s rarely productive to ask someone that was wrong, why did you do that? You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The pe…

Re: You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The person you’re questioning can perceive in your body language and tone of voice...Communication is hard...

You are right, communicating is indeed hard. Achieving clarity, brevity, and social "friendliness" at the same time is a multi-skill that most people get wrong: they tend to do one or two well, but rarely all three.

I will readily agree I often get the "social math" wrong, being it body language, tone of voice, etc. Maybe thousands of hours of training with a personal coach could "fix it", but that would cost around $100,000. For one, I find it hard to process the social math rules in my mind and focus on the topic at hand at the same time. My brain is not powerful enough to run both tasks simultaneously. The social side would have to be turned into a reflex so as to not interfere with the logical side's processing, and that typically takes lots of repetition training.

Dammit Jim, I'm a logical geek, not an actor!

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#217

Post by [deleted] » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 8:00 PM UTC

agumonkey wrote: post #205

GlenTheMachine wrote: post #53

This was precisely my wife's symptoms when we were first married. She was angry nearly all the time. She could hold it together in public, but at home it was miserable. She would go a full day at a time, alternatively not speaking, stomping around and throwing things, and yelling. It took a long time for her to be correctly diagnosed. It wasn't clear to me that depression was the issue, because as discussed in the ar…

One thing I learned on my own is that it's very easy to lose track of what 'normal' is. You slip slowly into different spectrum of emotions without really knowing why. When your mind is not at peace, stress/struggle will leak out in any shape be it anger, negativity, somatic onset (psoriasis, spasms) .. I believe strongly that we ought to aim for positivity and if we recognize something's not right, acknowledge it, a…

[deleted]

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#218

Post by [deleted] » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 8:04 PM UTC

GlenTheMachine wrote: post #208

agumonkey wrote: post #205

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One thing I learned on my own is that it's very easy to lose track of what 'normal' is. You slip slowly into different spectrum of emotions without really knowing why. When your mind is not at peace, stress/struggle will leak out in any shape be it anger, negativity, somatic onset (psoriasis, spasms) .. I believe strongly that we ought to aim for positivity and if we recognize something's not right, acknowledge it, a…

My layperson's understanding of depression is that it's your brain lying to you. My wife's perception of things that happened to her were often 180 degrees different from mine. She would take compliments I would give her, process them through the “depression” filter, and they would come out the other end as insults. You could actually watch it happen; there was a perceptible mental lag as the filters worked. To this…

[deleted]

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#219

Post by notacoward » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 8:05 PM UTC

avgDev wrote: post #28

The more you know about the world and tech especially, the more you will get depressed, IMO, maybe I'm wrong. Humans in general are pretty shitty, driven mostly by self-interest. I guess there are people driven by doing good but most people are capable of doing terrible things, especially when in a group. I do suffer from existential depression, I'm generally pretty happy, but as I learn more and live longer my outlo…

> Humans in general are pretty shitty, driven mostly by self-interest.

Maybe that's true. Maybe it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe it's projection. In any case, the real question is whether the people who say it are trying to make it at least a bit better or just using it as an excuse.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#220

Post by amriksohata » Mon, Feb 04, 2019, 8:05 PM UTC

Is there any data available for those more likely to be depressed ouf of these or similar categories:

1) Atheists 2) Creationists (of all religions) 3) Non practicising creationists (of all religions)

I'm not promoting any of the above here but I would like to see if there is any correlation between those who believe in a higher purpose and whether they are less or more likely to feel existential depression as they feel there is a reason to be here vs just being here to procreate because of evolution.