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Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

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Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#41

Post by grawprog »

joeax wrote: post #38
annadane wrote: post #3

Facebook is playing a very dangerous game by not allowing people full control of their feeds and even algorithmically sorting things. That's different from just "social media", it's a specifically Facebook way of doing things

I have scaled back my usage of Facebook after I discovered they are advertising my like activity to my audience i.e. "friends". I've had relatives accost me at family gatherings or have been unfriended over a Facebook page I followed, even though I rarely if ever share my personal views directly in my feed. Sometimes I'll like something even though I have a marginal interest in the subject. Facebook has the power to…

Ya...I really think hard about it before I like anything on facebook. Even scrolling through the feed or something I'm always concious not to accidently like anything or press the wrong button. I actually prefer looking through things on the few private groups i'm part of and if I post anything it'll be to one of those for the most part. Your normal facebook friends don't see anything you do on those.

I think worse though is when people tag you in public posts. You have no control over it at all, it gets announced to, seemingly randomly, some or all of your other friends...i'm not sure who exactly but I know other people end up seeing this...and the only way to get rid of it is to ask the other person to remove it or find the post, click untag yourself, not remove post from feed...that leaves you tagged in the post still...it needs to be the right one because if you remove it before untagging yourself good luck finding that shit again.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#42

Post by ljm »

teleclimber wrote: post #28

Interesting article about something we should definitely be having a conversation about. But i want to point out an anecdote: we have a newborn and we share pics of her privately with fam. All the pics are of her good moments: her first smiles, her just being cute, etc... We don't share pics or videos of her screaming her lungs out, or of her diaper explosions, which intuitively woul be weird. Reading this article it…

You might well be doing yourselves a disservice by not sharing the bad, but that definitely doesn't mean that Facebook is the right place for it.

Going deeper, I don't think we can just look at memories either being good or bad here. They'll all have different emotions attached that you might use to evaluate the goodness of the memory, but that goodness is going to change as soon as your perspective shifts. And keeping the unpleasant memories entirely to yourself may do more harm than good.

For example, I have memories of some truly awful experiences that left me deeply emotionally scarred; traumatised. I don't enjoy recalling those at all, but they have allowed me to protect myself and better understand my boundaries. Eventually my grip on those memories will loosen up because my survival instinct no longer depends on avoiding that experience, because I will have learned how to deal with it.

There are other memories I have that I truly cherish, but not because I call them good. I cherish them because they also amount as evidence to help me move on. I could easily go into any of those and flip them into painful memories: maybe instead of connecting with my best friend I start to think about what else could have happened. And the same with finding positive interpretations of a painful memory.

At the end of it all, I wouldn't want to reflect on my life from my death-bed and have absolutely no memory of anything I struggled with. That's usually where the beauty begins.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#43

Post by throwaway127831 »

village-idiot wrote: post #25
throwaway127831 wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Isn’t Twitter doing this as well by algorithmically sorting their feed? Why single out Facebook?

There’s a single switch on Twitter to turn this off. You can bash Twitter for a lot of things, but this isn’t it.

As long as algorithmic is the default, it’s changing aggregate behavior in a big way

I can switch algorithmic sorting off, but if it’s the default for everyone else, and causing the most polarizing political content to spread even faster, it effects me and even people who don’t use Twitter at all

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#44

Post by flycaliguy »

teleclimber wrote: post #28

Interesting article about something we should definitely be having a conversation about. But i want to point out an anecdote: we have a newborn and we share pics of her privately with fam. All the pics are of her good moments: her first smiles, her just being cute, etc... We don't share pics or videos of her screaming her lungs out, or of her diaper explosions, which intuitively woul be weird. Reading this article it…

I post screaming crying pictures and people love it. Just like you said, they appreciate the authentic. It reminds them of their years in the same position.

Heck, Facebook has a poll option. Poll your crowd and give them what they want.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#45

Post by borjamoya »

burdo3417 wrote: post #34
teleclimber wrote: post #28

Interesting article about something we should definitely be having a conversation about. But i want to point out an anecdote: we have a newborn and we share pics of her privately with fam. All the pics are of her good moments: her first smiles, her just being cute, etc... We don't share pics or videos of her screaming her lungs out, or of her diaper explosions, which intuitively woul be weird. Reading this article it…

Interesting point. But I believe the problem relies not in the sharing but in our perception of reality based on what others have shared. I understand that it's an inevitable consequence of the first but that has been the case for centuries. The new problem is that this misperceptions are now on a massive and unprecedented scale and our brain is constantly attacked by this misperceptions.

This is exactly right. The scope of social media is greater. It's a status show where your stuff isn't just in your living room but out there for you to “show off” to the world and compare it with others. This ultimately builds our story, our culture, that's when everybody believes a particular story and leads to the madness of crowds.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#46

Post by borjamoya »

gtirloni wrote: post #20
TomMarius wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Who is we? I am not paying anything AFAIK. When my girlfriend had problems, she simply stopped using it that much. I myself simply don't subscribe to pseudomotivational bullshit or internet "personalities".

"We" is referring to society in general. There will be exceptions to everything. Maybe you'd like to point out that people are free to opt out? Is that what you're saying?

That's what I meant, "we" as society, as culture. Because people aren't just tweaking their stories. When you do this at a mass scale you have a responsibility as citizen. And as I pointed out, building fictional stories can lead to genocides and wars (we've already seen it). We all suffer from this.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#47

Post by borjamoya »

egypturnash wrote: post #35

The ending was perfect. “Be very careful with stories and social media ALSO NOW IM ON YOUTUBE, LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE!”

What's wrong with that? I'm creating youtube videos because I know people are there, and the change I'm trying to create is to change people's minds. I can't change the way people consume media, so the only chance we've got is to adapt it and make change happen.

Re: Depression, Self-Identity and Reality: Living in a Story Created by Facebook

#48

Post by borjamoya »

boltzmannbrain wrote: post #40

I'm happier and healthier that these conversations are happening; I'm not alone. Facebook is clearly problematic, and I've been suspicious of the negative effects of Instagram and Hinge (dating app). The former would make me jealous/depressed/frustrated as I compare myself to glimpses of my peers supposedly winning at life. The latter would make me less outgoing in real life, b/c somehow flipping through dating profi…

Thanks for the links!
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