‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’ • Hacker News Board

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#561

Post by thisisit » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 4:29 AM UTC

rolleiflex wrote: post #325

GlenTheMachine wrote: post #145

This probably won't be popular, but what the hell. I feel like, if you strip away the outward trappings and dogma, this is what religion is good for. Not in a "believe in Jesus" or "trust in God" kind of way, but in a "how to orient your life" kind of way. Which is to say, the actually useful portion of religion generally teaches that your best life is probably not focused on you. It isn't about finding yourself, or…

I think we in the west ended up replacing religion with, not an absence of it, but with a religion of the Self — where you are the god, or the only one that matters anyway. That obviously doesn’t mean a sincere belief in one’s own omniscience, more that the the aura of ‘importance’ bestowed upon things naturally emanate from the centre of the Universe, which is you. Mind that humans are already pretty much hardwired…

> I think we in the west ended up replacing religion with, not an absence of it, but with a religion of the Self

More like objectivisim or individualism. Many of my small talks with people in the west include discussion about Ayn Rand and her work on FountainHead and Atlas Shrugged. After hearing about it for a long time I read the book. And frankly, the whole concept of individualism is strange to me.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#562

Post by adamrezich » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 4:53 AM UTC

phs318u wrote: post #560

adamrezich wrote: post #548

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Define "democracy." Purely democratic systems are absolutely fallible; mob rule is a thing man is prone to falling prey to in such systems. This is why basically nobody uses straight-up direct democracy today, especially in the age of everyone having read/write access to a global information network in their pockets at all times. But even putting that aside, and accepting for sake of the argument that the political s…

You keep raising the straw man of "settled science" - who here, or in fact in the scientific community, believes this let alone proclaims it? Even in broader (non-scientifically literate) society, there are few people (in my experience) that believe science knows everything already. Science had its "protestant" moment - it was called the Enlightenment, and it result from questioning the dogma of settled knowledge as…

I'm not going to list politically-charged examples because that's highly unlikely to lead to productive discussion and everyone here knows it.

I'm not knowledgeable about philosophy or metaphysics but is there even anything approaching consensus on whether or not there even is a "knowledge ceiling" that an individual or even society could ever achieve? (If so, I'd love to know how anyone came to that conclusion lol)

>Science had its "protestant" moment - it was called the Enlightenment, and it result from questioning the dogma of settled knowledge as promulgated by religions through the infallibility of scripture.

You seem to have misunderstood the analogy I was making. I'm a practicing Roman Catholic, yet view Protestantism as having been a positive thing for Christianity as a whole, including Roman Catholicism. When is dogmatic belief in whatever passes for "science" these days going to be scrutinized? Systemic corruption of any sufficiently powerful institution of man is inevitable, and just because the scientific method is about as pure of a means of reasoning about the world around us as we can come up with and has led to profound advancements in technology and our understanding of our world... doesn't mean that everyone's just going to ignore the fact that using the now-widespread dogmatic belief in its infallibility is a pretty powerful means of achieving external political and personal goals unrelated to the pursuit of truth. It's naive to think otherwise.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#563

Post by toomuchtodo » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:05 AM UTC

mattcaldwell wrote: post #66

toomuchtodo wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm happy to be your best man when the time comes. Email in my profile.

Maybe this is why you have "toomuchtodo" ;)

It's challenging to fit everything enjoyable or worth doing in one lifetime, but I intend to try. :)

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#564

Post by jslabovitz » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:08 AM UTC

This is kind of amazing: finding Buddha in an advice column. Definitely subscribing -- thanks, original poster, for the ref.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#565

Post by iN7h33nD » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:08 AM UTC

wallace_f wrote: post #246

danso wrote: post #159

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks for sharing. I had a close friend who was in a similar situation, and came to court to support him during the custody decision. It was so emotionally draining for me even as an outsider I can't begin to imagine actually being in that situation while trying to keep a career.

I had an experience with a woman who was banging on my door at night and threatening me. She had said she "already claimed me." I dont care about this woman and I dont have any ill will towards her but the whole thing was extroardinarily insane. Apparently she was working as a prostitute (someone else told me this and then showed me her ads on a website called backpage). After she threatened to physically hurt me, I…

Just watched a documentary about a female investigating the mens rights movement. It was very eye opening and some of the things they talk about hit home being a man. Its called The Red Pill[0].

Its not about the crazies on reddit by the way. It starts off a bit rough talking about controversial article written by mens rights activists, but just keep watching, I swear they explain it.

[0]: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt3686998/

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#566

Post by [deleted] » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:26 AM UTC

PavlovsCat wrote: post #116

toomuchtodo wrote: post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is our purposes as humans (IMHO, YMMV) to make life less harsh for those around us. From one internet stranger to another, you are a good person Jacques. We're all just walking each other home.

> Being compassionate is an act of resistance; it is different from being caring, or passive. Compassion, literally meaning ‘to suffer with’, is rooted in our loving desire to be alongside one another in our common struggle for a better spiritual and social reality. Compassion is an act of resistance because the compassionate cannot rest until all suffering has ended. Compassion is the recognition that none of us are…

[deleted]

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#567

Post by placeholderNam » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:30 AM UTC

Zelphyr wrote: post #290

wallace_f wrote: post #246

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I had an experience with a woman who was banging on my door at night and threatening me. She had said she "already claimed me." I dont care about this woman and I dont have any ill will towards her but the whole thing was extroardinarily insane. Apparently she was working as a prostitute (someone else told me this and then showed me her ads on a website called backpage). After she threatened to physically hurt me, I…

This is becoming a common thread these days; assuming the male is the aggressor. I've heard stories of girlfriends beating their boyfriend so bad as to have him visibly bleeding, yet when the he calls 911, he is the one that gets arrested with the police saying something along the lines of, "Yeah, there's no way a little girl like that beat you up." I would venture to guess that the majority of domestic violence is m…

I can't find the source right now, but I've read the male victims of DV are more likely to be arrested themselves when the call the police on the female perpetrator.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#568

Post by dang » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:35 AM UTC

pojzon wrote: post #301

aaaaaaaaaab wrote: post #12

Sounds like she fell between two stools: neither a fulfilling career, nor a family. I guess this is what you would call the modern American dream.

This is what you call "a woman who does not understand how SMV and MMV works like" People dont like those definitions but they are so true it hurts.

Please don't do this here.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#569

Post by astura » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:46 AM UTC

prawn wrote: post #536

40acres wrote: post #18

Everyone around us is fighting their own little war. I've felt similarly to the writer -- I moved out of my childhood home the day after graduating college and started work that Monday. I only moved 215 miles (NYC to Boston), but it felt a world away, especially considering most Americans live relatively close to where they grew up and 215 miles in Europe goes a long way. I've made and abandoned friends at almost eve…

Do you need to have a best man? Just go without if it doesn't feel right. My brother was mine, and my wife had five bridesmaids, but I don't see why you'd be obliged to have one or give them any formal duties. Always baffles me when couples go to awkward lengths to balance each side of the aisle.

Yep, Your wedding is yours and you get to do whatever the fuck you want, "wedding party" itself is totally optional.

Re: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

#570

Post by newen » Fri, Nov 30, 2018, 5:56 AM UTC

balls187 wrote: post #424

camelNotation wrote: post #244

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sounds like your perspective involves an omniscient ideal that does not and can not exist. Tradition exists for this very reason. We pass on what works, we do what works, and we don't presume to know what is better. That is what makes human beings so good at learning - we have the ability to hyper imitate one another. I see you doing something successfully, I don't need to know the actual process behind it, I just ne…

I'm assuming you're American... What you've written (own a home, have job, make kids, go to church) really only applies to american's, who make up ~300m out of 7b people currently inhabiting our planet. That definition of what we're evolved to do, is incredibly myopic; more so if you consider that definition of middle class has really only been around since the mid 1900's? Home ownership is very much ingrained in Ame…

> What you've written (own a home, have job, make kids, go to church) really only applies to american's, who make up ~300m out of 7b people currently inhabiting our planet.

No... This is true for middle middle class and richer people almost everywhere in the world.