Live data from Hacker News

Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

news.byu.edu

61–70 of 142 posts

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#62
post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This idea comes from a stereotypically female perspective. Men typically form stronger relationships with other men through shared struggles -- playing on a team together, going hunting, building something, etc. Working together and not complaining builds trust. To say that the female approach of long emotional talks and displays is objectively superior is not justified. Ask one of your friends who works in a female…

The practical issue is that men commit suicide more often and it seems like they suffer loneliness more often, especially at later age. The shared struggle only socialization does now work at all when you are sick or in bad situation. They also end up dependent on their wifes for keeping social network, which works until it does not. They also seem to vent their frustration in bigger angry blow ups which harms a.) th…

If you work in tech, you're not dealing with typical masculine behavior. Much of the anti-male sentiment in tech is from men (from the perspective of women) getting/internalizing the rewards of being successful without acting like a successful man.

Men normally are able to control their negative emotions, but you're right that women can be dichotomous, especially in tech. You can predict it if you know why and how they got into the industry.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#63

Something I find bemusing are the never ending slew of studies that aim to evangelize 'new ideas' in parenting and child rearing contrasted against the negative changes in outcomes of children and young adults in the US today. Children and young adults in the US today are, compared to decades past, suffering sharp spikes in mental illness, obesity, as well as performing relatively worse academically and even exhibiti…

Maybe it's the rise of all these men who use weasel words rather then presenting their argument and responding to criticism?

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#64
I don't want to take away from the results from the study. But it would be a great area to study the relationship between men and interaction with women, especially those displaying toxic femininity, in the context of fatherhood.

Don't know if anyone coined the term toxic femininity, but it should obviously be a field of study, just as toxic masculinity is.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#65
post #6

I was trying to understand andrewclunn now dead comment below. Basically he was saying there was no need for the author of the article (not the study) to write "toxic masculinity" narrative. When I clicked on the PDF, to scan for the word "toxic" I was unable to open the PDF. Did the author of the article Jon McBride artificially put this narrative spin on the study? If so, I don't understand why somebody would do th…

I think this field - sociology - and the humanities in general have become so much politicised that it is very hard to find articles on subjects like these which do not read like an action plan for some or other political group. While I could not get the article through Wiley I did find it on Sci-Hub: http://sci-hub.tw/https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12476 And yes, with lines like "... Given that hegemonic masculinity p…

I can't understand why your comment has been downvoted.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#66
post #63

Something I find bemusing are the never ending slew of studies that aim to evangelize 'new ideas' in parenting and child rearing contrasted against the negative changes in outcomes of children and young adults in the US today. Children and young adults in the US today are, compared to decades past, suffering sharp spikes in mental illness, obesity, as well as performing relatively worse academically and even exhibiti…

Maybe it's the rise of all these men who use weasel words rather then presenting their argument and responding to criticism?

This is perhaps the point. In science critiquing ideas is not what you do, at least beyond ensuring that they are logically consistent. Instead, you critique results. Relativity is something that, intuitively, sounds completely foolish and plainly absurd. Yet it is absolutely and completely correct, so far as we can currently determine. Or take penicillin - that treating infections with something that emerges as a byproduct of the blue green rot in decaying matter is a good idea is something that would run contrary to any person of any sensibility - and indeed, its utilization was actually neglected for many years after its discovery due to the presumption that such an illogical result simply could not be correct.

In the social sciences this point has been lost since the inability to perform meaningful tests means all we're left with are ideas. Yet we can see quantifiable changes in society in the longrun over time and many of the views evangelized within the paper have certainly become more common place - with the authors going so far as to label them "the new ideals". Yet the results we can measure have been absolutely atrocious. But there seems to be little to no interest in consider why this may be. Instead it's onward to ever more new ideas supported by little more than intuition and studies that increasingly often cannot even be replicated built upon other studies that can't be replicated. And even this study builds upon that house of cards stating that previous studies trying to link what they linked were unsuccessful, yet with their 'new and improved' method of qualifying masculinity, they were able to finally show a link.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think this field - sociology - and the humanities in general have become so much politicised that it is very hard to find articles on subjects like these which do not read like an action plan for some or other political group. While I could not get the article through Wiley I did find it on Sci-Hub: http://sci-hub.tw/https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12476 And yes, with lines like "... Given that hegemonic masculinity p…

I can't understand why your comment has been downvoted.

Discussions on the reasons for downvoting are frowned upon here so it is best not to discuss this 'out in the open'.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#68
post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The practical issue is that men commit suicide more often and it seems like they suffer loneliness more often, especially at later age. The shared struggle only socialization does now work at all when you are sick or in bad situation. They also end up dependent on their wifes for keeping social network, which works until it does not. They also seem to vent their frustration in bigger angry blow ups which harms a.) th…

If you work in tech, you're not dealing with typical masculine behavior. Much of the anti-male sentiment in tech is from men (from the perspective of women) getting/internalizing the rewards of being successful without acting like a successful man. Men normally are able to control their negative emotions, but you're right that women can be dichotomous, especially in tech. You can predict it if you know why and how th…

There is no more manly profession then working in tech for collage educated people. People are literally choosing tech because, and I am quoting here, "it is good job for a boy". I mean, it is good job, but boys are not loosing masculinity by doing tech at all. Quite the opposite.

Men in tech are somewhat more introverted then the rest. They are not more emotional nor feminine then actors, writers, sales or literally any profession. Speaking of groups, the men with least in control are those who end up in jail and similar troubles.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#69
post #25

I left the bay area in 2013 when my third kid was born. I'm about 110 miles north now. I expected that as I withdrew from long office hours, replacing it with remote work, my income stagnate (or go down). The opposite happened - my income has actually gone up steadily. Towards the point of this topic - I have been able to spend a lot of time with my kids. We walk (or bike) to and from school, I coach sports, and I'm…

I have a ten month old and start a new remote job next week (with a pay raise, which surprised me). I'm leaving a job I like, but which is stressful, for it. Thanks for sharing your story, it assuages my substantial nervousness about entering the unknown.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#70
post #60

One of my earlier memories is my dad going away to GW1. And when it wasn't war it was training or night flying or exchanges or just on standby while we were away. After my dad left the air force he worked in Saudi for 10 years or so, during which I spent much of my time in boarding schools. Conversely I work from home and see my kids all the time, albeit they're still younger than my own memories. Only last week I ha…

Sorry if I'm obtuse but I guess it's because that's too tall for the air force?
Post reply on HN