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What is empathy?

the-tls.co.uk

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Re: What is empathy?

#61

Post by computator »

jm__87 wrote: post #59
mysterypie wrote: post #57

Paul Graham had a lot of interesting observations about empathy in his 2003 essay "Hackers and Painters": Like painting, most software is intended for a human audience. And so hackers, like painters, must have empathy to do really great work. You have to be able to see things from the user's point of view. When I was a kid I was always being told to look at things from someone else's point of view. What this always m…

I find it interesting how many varying definitions for empathy I'm seeing in this thread. I always thought of empathy to specifically be "feeling oriented", not simply taking someone else's perspective. Not saying anyone is wrong here, seems like we have yet to fully come to a consensus on what the word empathy really means.

> how many varying definitions for empathy I'm seeing

The words sympathy and empathy are like the words ashamed and embarrassed. Everyone thinks they know the difference, but when they try to explain it, they find that it's very difficult to separate the words.

At least for my own mind, I found a handy way of differentiating sympathy and empathy from a line in The Tipping Point, by Malcolm Gladwell: If I hit my thumb with a hammer, most people watching will grimace: they'll mimic my emotional state. This is what is meant by empathy. So, then, sympathy is when you don't grimace but say something like, "I hope you're OK."

Re: What is empathy?

#62

Post by fyi1183 »

Puer wrote: post #12
slavik81 wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You state a position, but don't present any argument to support it. You seem to contradict the dictionary definition[1], so what are you basing your definition on? Why is that a better definition and how does that relate to the research in this article? [1] "the ability to understand and share the feelings of another"

I don't agree with the notion that you need to "understand" to be empathetic. If a friend tells me that they're going through a rough time I feel like it's disingenuous for me to tell them that I understand their situation, even if I myself have been through difficult periods. I can't and don't feel like I should give the impression I can understand the nuance of their situation. I've found it's much more productive…

You may be thinking of compassion or sympathy rather than empathy.

Re: What is empathy?

#63

Post by ismail »

jm__87 wrote: post #59
mysterypie wrote: post #57

Paul Graham had a lot of interesting observations about empathy in his 2003 essay "Hackers and Painters": Like painting, most software is intended for a human audience. And so hackers, like painters, must have empathy to do really great work. You have to be able to see things from the user's point of view. When I was a kid I was always being told to look at things from someone else's point of view. What this always m…

I find it interesting how many varying definitions for empathy I'm seeing in this thread. I always thought of empathy to specifically be "feeling oriented", not simply taking someone else's perspective. Not saying anyone is wrong here, seems like we have yet to fully come to a consensus on what the word empathy really means.

Empathy has multiple dimensions, so all the different perspectives are partly right.

Cognitive empathy: is seeing things through your perspective

Emotional empathy: I feel what you feel

Emphatic concern: I care for your well-being

http://www.danielgoleman.info/three-kinds-of-empathy-cogniti...

Edit: added reference

Re: What is empathy?

#64

Post by Kalium »

projektir wrote: post #17
ThomPete wrote: post #2

This is an ongoing discussion I have with many people. There is a weird idea that empathy is something that makes you good. In reality what it is is neither good nor bad. It's the ability to put yourself in the emotional state of someone else to understand things not only from their rational point of view but from the point of view of them as humans with both irrational (emotional) and rational perspectives. It can b…

> There is a weird idea that empathy is something that makes you good. It's a pretty heavy prerequisite. A lot of bad things can be traced to people not understanding other people, or refusing to understand them (dehumanization). It's sufficiently fundamental and a common problem that I'm not sure how big the cohort of emphatic-but-manipulative people is. It certainly exists, but there are other issues mixed in there…

My experience is that for some, dehumanization is a direct response to having their capacity for empathy overwhelmed. It's a defense mechanism. I've seen it play out in people who are confronted with the homelessness epidemic in San Francisco.

With that in mind, making the whole world more empathetic sounds like one of the most destructive - if obviously well-intentioned - ideas I can think of.

Re: What is empathy?

#65

Post by nils-m-holm »

hliyan wrote: post #49

Having witnessed many cases of individuals who help the poor, donate to cancer/heart patients and then turn on a dime and advocate the carpet bombing of rebel held civilian areas, I'm starting to feel empathy is not the issue. The empathy circuits are intact in most human beings. The problem is dehumanization . Empathy is proportional to how "human" we perceive someone/something to be. We experience the most empathy…

In addition to dehumanization, which is a huge problem, there are also people who just want to be perceived as being empathic and charitable.

There is a couple in my neighborhood that makes a big point out of helping people in poor countries, sending toys to their children on Christmas, hosting all kinds of charity events, etc, but on a personal level, they behave like the numbest troglodytes and could not care less about anybody's needs.

In some people, empathy is a carefully crafted facade without any substance behind it, which might also be a reason why they are in favor of carpet bombing.

Re: What is empathy?

#67

Post by gxs »

nils-m-holm wrote: post #65
hliyan wrote: post #49

Having witnessed many cases of individuals who help the poor, donate to cancer/heart patients and then turn on a dime and advocate the carpet bombing of rebel held civilian areas, I'm starting to feel empathy is not the issue. The empathy circuits are intact in most human beings. The problem is dehumanization . Empathy is proportional to how "human" we perceive someone/something to be. We experience the most empathy…

In addition to dehumanization, which is a huge problem, there are also people who just want to be perceived as being empathic and charitable. There is a couple in my neighborhood that makes a big point out of helping people in poor countries, sending toys to their children on Christmas, hosting all kinds of charity events, etc, but on a personal level, they behave like the numbest troglodytes and could not care less…

You know, I’ve always felt that the Bay Area, ironically, has a disproportionate number of these people.

I’m from LA, but live here in the bay, and people often will tell me how fake Angelinos are.

For my perspective, people in LA might be ostensibly more superficial, but at least it’s authentic and in general people don’t try to hide it.

Contrast to the Bay Area, it seeems like having a cause is trendy here, which is superficial in its own way.

I went to cal and ended up staying for friends/work so don’t get me wrong, I love it here. But like all places, it has it’s own nuances.

Re: What is empathy?

#68

Post by Annatar »

Female brains have evolved to be better at empathizing and communicating and are hard-wired for empathy. Male brains are more suited to rational understanding and system-building – from making machines and writing software to engaging in abstract thought, writing music, engaging in politics, or theorizing about the fundamental foundations of physics.

And herein is the reason why there are so few female engineers, especially in computer science, laid bare. The task at hand, then, should be to continue buckling the stereotype in gender segregation: little girls should be encouraged to become more involved in being system builders and tinkerers, while little boys should be nurtured to develop and show significantly more empathy. This will be hard going, but the good news is that it is entirely doable.

Empathy is still a core engineering value.

Re: What is empathy?

#69

Post by lsd5you »

hliyan wrote: post #49

Having witnessed many cases of individuals who help the poor, donate to cancer/heart patients and then turn on a dime and advocate the carpet bombing of rebel held civilian areas, I'm starting to feel empathy is not the issue. The empathy circuits are intact in most human beings. The problem is dehumanization . Empathy is proportional to how "human" we perceive someone/something to be. We experience the most empathy…

I would disagree. The problem is the unnatural, ever expanding range of concern for the entire human population as it increases and as things globalise. We in general get no additional happiness from remote billions of people and only added risks and concerns. It is hardly surprising that the natural empathy capacity is being exceeded.

Worse the limited amount we do have is manipulated. As remote concerns are selectively beamed into our consciousness via the media.

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