Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

medium.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

81–90 of 181 posts

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#81

Post by gjjrfcbugxbhf »

spiznnx wrote: post #24
vxNsr wrote: post #3

So basically people with opinions on both extremes feel marginalized and unheard. I guess that's maybe a message to consider a more nuanced position.

I want Silicon Valley to be a place where you can publicly hold extreme views and not be a huge social liability to anyone you associate with (employer, friends).

The thing is you are free to hold and expose extreme views - and I strongly support your right to do so and not to be subject to persecution from the state for doing so. However I also have the right to not associate with you if I think that you are a dick.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#82

Post by johnny22 »

spiznnx wrote: post #22

My S.O. thinks that transgender thought poses a threat to feminist aims and should not be acceptable to society, and has some really good arguments. I'm starting to be convinced, but I really can't discuss it with anyone else. edit: goodnight as its getting late.

I came it from your SO's side, and then went away from it. I didn't grow up around uhmm "liberals" and "liberal doctrine", so I had to figure it out for myself.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#83

Post by insickness »

stared wrote: post #57

My impression is that it is not only about topics, but also perceived intentions (and if you step, however unintentionally, on a trigger (of a landmine)). I wrote Dating for Nerds: Gender differences ( http://p.migdal.pl/2017/09/30/dating-for-nerds-gender-differ... ) and got no backlash (much to my surprise, though). From my experience nerds (and aspies in particular) talk mostly to exchange information (learn, share…

"A non-nerd reads it as: I want to kick out all X from tech. / I consider X inferior."

I was out on an internet date with Scandinavian woman a few years ago. She was some type of sociological researcher, which interested me. I told her that part of the discrepancy in representation between genders in tech could be biologically oriented and she immediately said, "I don't want to hear arguments from biology!" She said it with the same tone and conviction you'd label someone a racist.

It's as if once we allow these facts into the argument, it means we can say the fight for gender equality is finished, that whenever equality exists, we can all throw our hands up in the air and say, "It's biology!" I can see the danger but at the same time, the alternative--denying reality--is far more insidious.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#84

Post by spiznnx »

gjjrfcbugxbhf wrote: post #77
spiznnx wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Your S.O. seems like a bigot. Yes, it did seem that way at first. I had a hard time of truly listening when we first began to discuss it as I had already formed my own standard, liberal, opinions about the topic.

Yeah your s.o. is discriminating against a group of people because they think that that group's existence damages their goals. Stop listening and start getting away.

They are discriminating against a group of people in the same way you're discriminating against them: for their beliefs. You can't choose your birth gender or race or sexuality, but you can choose how you approach the fact that you don't seem to fit society's mold for men/women.

Thanks for the relationship advice.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#85

Post by spiznnx »

johnny22 wrote: post #82
spiznnx wrote: post #22

My S.O. thinks that transgender thought poses a threat to feminist aims and should not be acceptable to society, and has some really good arguments. I'm starting to be convinced, but I really can't discuss it with anyone else. edit: goodnight as its getting late.

I came it from your SO's side, and then went away from it. I didn't grow up around uhmm "liberals" and "liberal doctrine", so I had to figure it out for myself.

If you have more to share I'd love to hear it.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#87

Post by johnny22 »

vxNsr wrote: post #3

So basically people with opinions on both extremes feel marginalized and unheard. I guess that's maybe a message to consider a more nuanced position.

some positions have no nuance though. There's no middle ground to "black people are inferior to white people". There's no difference to split.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#88

Post by gaius »

TheAceOfHearts wrote: post #55
evangelista wrote: post #11

“A lot of the ideas here will not actually get you ostracized from Silicon Valley society.” Oh dude you have just not been paying attention. Can you show me a single example of someone in tech who publicly expresses, at any point, any of the beliefs which are “not allowed?” I’m looking for one. Find me one person on Twitter in tech aside from John McAfee or Peter Theil who would dare. Sam Altman was good enough to st…

I agree with some of the points you make, and I think they're pretty reasonable positions to take. But I'm curious as to the arguments against all gender bathrooms? I've visited tons of restaurants over the years that just had a single restroom, and it's never been a problem. When you have people over they might use your bathroom, and that's also not considered a problem. Heck, at all the doctor's offices I recall vi…

But I'm curious as to the arguments against all gender bathrooms? I've visited tons of restaurants over the years that just had a single restroom, and it's never been a problem. When you have people over they might use your bathroom, and that's also not considered a problem

As someone who grew up watching Ally McBeal, I am pretty sure that noone of my generation really has any problem with unisex toilets. But where the confusion comes from is that I think that the concept of a "bathroom" has somehow been conflated with that of a "changing room", e.g. at a gym or something. I have found that people who are passionately against them, with gently probed, actually mean the latter.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#89

Post by gjjrfcbugxbhf »

spiznnx wrote: post #84
gjjrfcbugxbhf wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah your s.o. is discriminating against a group of people because they think that that group's existence damages their goals. Stop listening and start getting away.

They are discriminating against a group of people in the same way you're discriminating against them: for their beliefs. You can't choose your birth gender or race or sexuality, but you can choose how you approach the fact that you don't seem to fit society's mold for men/women. Thanks for the relationship advice.

I am not discriminating. Your s.o. is free to hold and promote whatever views they have our want to have. I support their right to do so. I however also have rights. I have the right to defend that people are allowed to be themselves+ without fear of persecution. I also have have the right to choose who to associate with.

+I think for example that gender and sexuality are not choices and that I should not tell other people how to live their lives.

Re: What People Think You Can’t Say in Silicon Valley

#90

Post by [deleted] »

evangelista wrote: post #11

“A lot of the ideas here will not actually get you ostracized from Silicon Valley society.” Oh dude you have just not been paying attention. Can you show me a single example of someone in tech who publicly expresses, at any point, any of the beliefs which are “not allowed?” I’m looking for one. Find me one person on Twitter in tech aside from John McAfee or Peter Theil who would dare. Sam Altman was good enough to st…

[deleted]
Post reply on HN