On Being a Science Writer and Managing a Mental Illness

There's nothing unique to Christianity here. It's just very easy for someone who's found what he needed to imagine that that's what everyone else needs, too. It's also a lot easier, I think especially for Christians but by no means only for us, to go that way, than to realize - and live up to - the fact that what we're truly called to do is not merely to speak easy words, but to take difficult actions; not to profess an answer to someone's problems, but as best we can to be that answer, even if only for a minute.

Our faith, in short, requires that we live for others. That's hard to do, and most of us are not good at it. My brother errs. I'm sorry for that.

1. In the United States most insurance will pay for a handful of Therapy sessions.

2. I had a breakdown years ago. Looking back it was just a massive Panic Attack. What really surprised me is I woke up the next morning feeling o.k., then out of the blue--life crushing anxiety. Anxiety so bad I just physically shook, and was always in tears. This went on for years.

3. After a week into the anxiety, I saw a Ph.D in psychology. I spent all my savings on these sessions. The result--not a bit of help. Now, they will claim that twice a week for 9 months is "not giving it enough time", but at a $100 a session it was just a waste of money.

4. I was finally referred to a Psychiatrist. He put me on all the antidepressants. None worked. He put me on a long half life benzodiazepine, and with a bottle of wine I was kinda functional.

5. My point is try Psychology/Psychiatry. Remember it's more of an art, than a science. I didn't realize this when I was in my twenties. Over the years, I have seem the spark dwindle from my Psychiatrist's eyes. I think if he had a do over, he would have picked a different speciality.

6. If I had a do over, I would have skipped it all. I did eventually stop drinking, but for years it was the only drug that worked, besides having to beg for low doses of benzodiazepines. I'm now trying to get off benzos, but figure why, at this point in my life. It's still a bitch getting any controlled drug from most doctors.

7. I can say this. So many of you will just get better with Time, but it might take awhile. (The "Professionals" conviently leave this out. There are some studies praising time verse therapy/drugs, but they are buried, and were small studies. I my case, it felt like I wounded my brain that night of the huge anxiety attack, and it would take years to heal. The experts told me most people do get better in a few weeks. I didn't. The depression arose because my life went from great to just lucky to get to sleep. Exercise did help eventually. At first, it didn't at all. I needed alcohol. I didn't want to blow out my liver in my twenties, so I only drank when I absolutely needed it. Don't overload that liver.

8. I once had a talk to a resident Psychiatrist. At first, he was a a cheerleader for his decision to specialize in psychiatry. After some debate, and honest reflection, he admitted to me all the modalities/drugs work a tiny bit in some patients, and the profession has a way to go.

9. I do know this, patients whom have been on a drug for a period of a few years shouldn't have to go into those prearranged sessions, just to refill a script. If the drug does not require blood monitoring, the patient should get refills. I know so many people who self medicated with alcohol, because our American system of treating mental illness sucks.

10. Time. I know, who has time. I need to function tomorrow. You have my heart.

But you can have the best social setting, and mental illness will still happen and still affect you dealing with things. Depression makes it just as hard to get out of bed on nice days as foul ones.

If Santa Claus showed up at your doorstep and took you on a ride in his sleigh, you'd stop being an atheist. You no longer become an atheist when your experiences or reason casts doubt on it, same as no longer being religious. For some people, atheism is really weak, and tends to be held culturally in the same way religion used to be.

I think personally in the west atheism is more akin to victorian christianity..it's just a baseline belief "cultured" people hold, and generally is held without thinking much about the consequences as people go about their daily lives.

Ok, I'm really more bothered by the expected scientific rigorous from an essay like this.

He's a writer and is experiencing the difficulties of his work and how it effects his emotional well being. It shouldn't then really surprise that he sees a strong connection between his work as a writer and the depressions he has. That doesn't mean he's telling an objective truth about a writer's life, but he's telling a subjective "truth" of his life as a writer, and sometimes these subjective "truths" can tell you quite a bit about life.

Sometimes the HN crowd can get quite a bit annoying with its scientific thinking, because it's not always the appropiate method, and sometimes a single person can tell you more about a certain aspect of the world then any kind of scientific study.

I'm certainly not arguing against the scientific method, but to apply it in a reasonable way.