Why is this allowed on HN? It's not tech, startups or anything in between.
Is there a website like HN that's actually focused/moderated and doesn't mix Cosmo type clickbait with actual news?
To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
21–30 of 94 posts
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#22Can't wait until they have to litigate this one!
It is probably unerforceable. It is a peer agreement, not a legally binding contract, with opt-out provisions. Still, immensely useful.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#23This feels like something only a woman could put forward or demand in a relationship based on their value in the dating market. A man would be in a much higher risk of being left with the same arrangement.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#24Doesn't looks like a universal solution to me. It looks that this particular solution works for them.
I know god knows how much families in my home country (Russia) who had no problems living together to old age without having to do anything special. I also know god knows how much dysfunctional families as well. I knew quite a few oddbals too, a couple that were still lovey dovey and dating casually for close to 12 years since their mid-teens. I knew a married couple that everybody suspected to be "mutually-infidel," yet they had a really strong bond.
It is all luck and compatibility/synergies of individual differences
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#25>We spent weeks anxiously enumerating the pros and cons of cohabitation.
The older I get, the more I come around to the conclusion that thought is bad.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#26Sounds strange, and horrible. A relationship isn't a business.`
A relationship isn't a business.
Sounds like someone who never met a divorce/family law attorney. In California legally speaking part your relationship is treated as such.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#27Better title: "To stay in love, communicate honestly and openly" | these guys just happened to find a way to do that in writing
Though that's usually easier said than done. Communicating openly and honestly is something that a lot of couples think they do, but it's hard to tell the difference between a partner that isn't communicative (or was once communicative, but stopped), and a partner that has nothing to communicate. It's trusting communicativeness to self-perpetuate. In an ideal relationship we could have faith in such implicit self-perpetuation, but humans aren't always perfect, and having an explicit and expected opportunity to communicate new expectations (in the OP's case, via a (perhaps deliberately ridiculous) contract negotiation) might be all it takes to keep communication on track. If it keeps them happy, then good for them!
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#28Why is this allowed on HN? It's not tech, startups or anything in between. Is there a website like HN that's actually focused/moderated and doesn't mix Cosmo type clickbait with actual news?
There are quite a few submissions on here that aren't tech or startups but still can have value to the HN audience.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#29Better title: "To stay in love, communicate honestly and openly" | these guys just happened to find a way to do that in writing
"Trust" also happens to be the foundation for a good relationship.
It took me nearly 10 years to understand the line "I believe that trust is more important than monogamy" in that old Savage Garden song. It took an ex who was (I think) physically faithful (at that point) while completely dismantling my faith in humanity to figure that one out.
Re: To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line
#30I don't get it.
The title of the article is "To Stay in Love, Sign on the Dotted Line," but there's absolutely nothing in it that supports the title. All it is is about an unmarried woman whose been in a relationship for only 3 years saying a scheduled conversations and paper an pen (or keyboard in this case) helps her have relationship communication.
The title should really be "communication is helpful for my new relationship."
It's misguided at best to conclude every couple should create this sort of formal contract. Every couple communicates differently.