Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
231–240 of 317 posts
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#232To me this is a failure of Uber of course, but also of the guy's wife. She is supposed to be his best friend, life partner, and a lover. If she couldn't detect that her partner needed urgent help then I am afraid he didn't have the happiest marriage out there. Same goes for his family, how can they even claim they're his family if they never detected this? Therapists most of the time don't amount for anything. They p…
I'm surprised this isn't getting downvoted to hell considering how insensitive this message is and how simple minded one has to be to blame such a tragedy on one person.
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#233All, Hear me out. The first thing you need to overcome is not your wallet, or your options, timing or any other thing. It is -- your mind. If you experience this level of pressure, quit. And then start looking. Do not be influenced that your boss is the boss of your life or your career for that matter. If you've got a family to take care of, quickly join a consulting firm. Worst case you'll have to travel some, but i…
Tell that to somebody who has a family, or is paying child support/alimony. I'm sure their ex will sympathize that it's not about your wallet, but your mind.
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#234To me this is a failure of Uber of course, but also of the guy's wife. She is supposed to be his best friend, life partner, and a lover. If she couldn't detect that her partner needed urgent help then I am afraid he didn't have the happiest marriage out there. Same goes for his family, how can they even claim they're his family if they never detected this? Therapists most of the time don't amount for anything. They p…
I'm surprised this isn't getting downvoted to hell considering how insensitive this message is and how simple minded one has to be to blame such a tragedy on one person.
Maybe it's my very happy life with my wife; once I got together with her I finally started understanding how important a supportive partner is.
One can't simply tell you "I love you" and not detect you're on the verge of a suicide.
What arguments do you have against my points?
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#235This is not unique to Uber. I have worked in toxic environments that depleted and debilitated me to the point that, in two cases, I was psychologically completely incapable of even thinking about finding work for three months after being laid off from one, and quitting the other. It doesn't even take abusive bosses who don't like you, although that just makes it far worse. It simply takes being treated like a robotic…
Well said. I've worked at 3 start-ups and at all of them I've worked long, grueling hours with the most recent one I was doing at least 65 hours a week (typically longer especially with a 3+ hour commute). I became severely burned out to the point where I didn't want to look for work or do much of anything. I was depressed and had severe anxiety. I went to the hospital with an anxiety attack so strong that I literall…
Hope you don't mind me asking, but why would you work 65 hours in the first place? Or what do people expect to truly gain for "giving up" almost all of their waking hours for a company? High salary, equity, respect of peers, personal growth?
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#236What I have found out over the years is that having roughly 4-6 months worth of living expenses in the bank (unblocked and accessible within 24 hours) alleviates stress. Figure out how many months worth of savings makes you feel comfortable, and have an 'oh shit' budget figured out for times of willing/unwilling unemployment. For example, I can cut my spendings by 40% in case of unemployment simply by cutting luxury…
>40 hours a week with no overtime or on-call for me! I will not be the employee with the mad bonuses when the time comes for that, but I will also be the one not on medication/suicide watch/psychiatric aid.
I'm guessing you'll bring in more per hour than they will, even with their bonus.
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#237Earlier quoted context omitted.
Doesn't help when you have notice period of 2 months
For the most part, in the United States, this kind of notice is a courtesy not 100% required.
Are there any states where it's illegal to just walk out? I know you can in New York and all of the Midwest.
Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#238Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#239Re: Suicide of an Uber engineer: Widow blames job stress
#240Earlier quoted context omitted.
The decision to commit suicide is rarely made in a rational state of mind. Unlike most decisions, however, this one is permanent.
Almost all of our decisions are, really, permanent - and most of the time, we're not making them rationally. Break up with your significant other - then, even if you decide to "reverse" it and get back together, it won't be the same relationship anymore. Quit from your job - most likely, you won't work for the same company ever again. Yes, these are only parts of life, and suicide ends life as a whole - but you have…
Clinical depression is significantly different from terminal illness. Depression doesn't have to be a death sentence. Yes, it is immense mental, emotional, and intellectual suffering. But that doesn't mean death is the right answer, and someone who is suffering from clinical depression is not in the right frame of mind to make that distinction.
I speak as someone who has been there, is currently taking antidepressants, and has seriously considered the option at multiple times in my life. Depression will tell you there is no other method of relief from the pain, but depression lies.