Why Nerds Are Unpopular (2003)

This is part because the smart kids are told they go to school to learn things. That's obviously not the case; school is a horrible environment for transmitting knowledge and skill.

I for one never figured out that school was there to learn to socialise until far too late. My parents obviously meant well, and I hold no grudge, but if I was told when I was 10 or 12 to focus on the subjects I liked rather than try to do well in everything, and spend the rest of the time making friends and having fun and paying attention to other people, I'd probably be just as well off in terms what I actually retained, and much better off in social skills.

You don't sound condescending and like an asshole here at all /s

All social animals have the concept of social rank.

Rather than popularity I would rather translate that to: "why nerds are ranked lower in the human social structure". Now, to answer that, you need to standardize in a definition for nerd.

Nerd for some is about superficial traits, whereas for others it is only a descriptor for personality traits, for others it is about intellectual traits, whereas for others it is about interests.

I think the answer lies on how humans, or generalizing, greater apes, rank each other. For example: if you went hunting, who would you take with you in descending order?

At that point in your life it is a larger fraction of your life. 25% at age 16. That's why, also just having been in school for 10 years. But one should keep the philosophy that everything in life is relatively short in general. This too shall pass.

> it really did feel like it went on forever.

It does go on forever.

The only difference is that the "opt out" option is unlocked after high school, but opting out has consequences. Even if we don't want to admit it, there's a lot of truth to the phrase "It's not what you know but who you know".

I hung out with plenty of nerds in high school, and most of them took solace in the belief that they'd eventually be laughing all the way to the bank while the jocks were flipping burgers. It's one of those things you keep repeating to make yourself feel better even when you suspect it's not true (kind of like people who say "I could've been popular if I wanted to").

Turns out they were wrong, and I'm guessing it's because popular people are able to use their superior social/networking skills to easily find job opportunities (and promotions), while nerds struggle to find the courage to answer the phone when the interviewer calls.