Ask HN: Helping a dev who drinks?

I'm very confused by this story.

> …when he is drinking, he can code things that no one else on staff can do quickly.

> I and the others stand and watch in awe as he types so fast we can barely follow.

Impressive, but why are you all watching this guy? Don't you have work to do as well?

> We have to get him a ride home, help him walk to the door and have an intern walk him to his apartment so that he doesn't go in the wrong place.

Wow, that's crazy drunk. How does he get so drunk at work? Does he drink on the job? If so, how is he hiding it?

And after reading your description of how good he is at coding, I think you're exaggerating how drunk he gets. I find it unlikely that someone can write C++ with such proficiency, especially when they're too drunk to find their apartment.

Also, how do you know he won't be able to find his apartment? Was there an incident after the first time you dropped him off? If so, how'd you find out? Most people would be too embarrassed to tell that story to their coworkers.

> Then, a few days later, he comes back to the office like nothing has happened.

Wait, he writes crucial code and disappears for days afterwards?! What happens if you have any questions or issues with the code? Clearly you can't deploy any of it until he returns, otherwise you risk breaking production systems and having nobody around who's able to fix it. And is he paid during this time? Does he call in sick or something? This whole bit seems crazy to me. Why not have other people on the team spend a few days writing the code instead? As long as they can implement a hash table in under three days, you'll have better overall productivity.

Many of the details of your story raise more questions than they answer. If it was just a couple of discrepancies, I'd ignore them. But your story is permeated with them. I hate to be the one who says this, but my fabrication sense is tingling.

I have no doubt that there are alcoholic employees who need help. It's just that this story feels like it was written to maximize the degree of the dilemma (fire vs. help), not to accurately relate a story about an alcoholic coworker.

maybe the OP is asking "for a friend". Either way, it's a good subject for a real conversation.

I had to stop drinking recently, probably for good. A friend pointed out my behaviour when drunk and suggested that alcohol was not doing me any good.

I've found new clarity and sense of purpose since I quit. It may not be the solution for everyone, but it's worked for me.

I'm also in counselling to try and solve some of the issues that caused me to get in that state. Also helping.

A good employer doesn't let their economic need for awesome code get in the way of doing the right thing for their employees. Apart from the potential legal consequences, letting employee destroy themselves is not Good For The Company.

Have the hard conversation. Suggest assistance that may help. You won't be able to stop them from drinking, only they can do that, but you can stop enabling them.

Good luck.

My little pinkie tells me you are a fellow more junior coder and that you are trying to deal with a situation that is not in your full authority (management or HR). I guess you have been talking of it as a team and are trying to bypass the hierarchy because you expect them to potentially fire him. You may be alone thinking of actually doing more than talking about it between yourselves.

This is nice. You seem to care. That is a good point.

Talk to him and listen to him. Nicely, as a friend and ask him how he feels about it. The alcohol is there to alleviate a big pain. The pain will be worse if he tries to stop violently. Violent withdrawal put your body in bad state anyway. He may have tried and experienced it first hand and may be scared to try again. If he does share his experience, it means he has made a lot of work on himself already.

You can propose him attending one AA meeting (together or not). It is a nice beginning because they don't guilt people and they actually know what they talk about.

They will probably confirm HN is not the right place to ask for help, and that my advice were a tad wrong.

AA seems to work for some people. It does not fit others.

If it fails, well, maybe it will still help him begin to do the second step. There are other solutions.

I don't know your proximity. Just don't over-invest yourself and accept you might fail.

Helping him for the first step and talking to him is way more than most people do. So if you fail, don't guilt yourself.

> maybe the OP is asking "for a friend"

That's what I initially thought, but it's a throwaway account. There's no risk that the post will be traced back to a real-world person. And a first-person accounting would invite commenters to help directly. I've seen Ask HN threads where the poster had a substance abuse problem. The community is very accepting when it comes to these things.