I've thought about building a dead man's switch product before, but I realized the immense commitment that such a product entails. It must continue to function for a very long time, and if it fails to function, very important messages would be lost. So, I hope you're in this for the long haul.
Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
91–100 of 118 posts
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#92Earlier quoted context omitted.
Aha ok I see. But then I don’t see how it could be two apps, what would the app without the game do?
It just requires you to take some action on a recurring basis. Someone who is not trying to hide that they have a deadman switch on their phone doesn't need a game, they just need a button they can push to indicate that they are still alive.
Ok I thought the hiding was the point, but maybe there’s a use case.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#93At the risk of sounding insensitive - I don't understand what this is. I know what a dead man's switch is, of course - maybe an app that emails your next in kin your email password or cryptocurrency private key if you haven't checked in for a few months. But what would this do? SMS the hospital/police if it's been 24 hours since you played hangman? What is an actual example of intended use? I know it's probably not t…
People who are targets of abuse obviously have problem getting out of it. There are various reasons, most frequently they are financially or psychologically dependent on the abuser.
It is very frequently that person trying to help a victim is unable to convince the victim to leave the abuser.
Faced this situation, the next best step is to offer some kind of lifeline that can be triggered when things get bad. It is very important this is inconspicuous because it otherwise is very likely to trigger abusive behavior from their captor and if it is not inconspicuous it has very little chance of being actually used. Abused person that has no privacy is unlikely to call public number that can be tracked to their support person and may face being cut off from any communication.
It is not that important who is on the other side, the same way that is not important who hears shouts of captive person. What is important is there will be some help coming when it is needed the most.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#94Maybe the words "dead man" in the name of a service about domestic abuse is not such a great idea :( It's a well known technical term for us, but probably not so much for the general public, so this could be easily misinterpreted.
Anyone who's used a lawn mower should know what it is
So obviously "Dead Man's Switch" is a smart lawnmower remote control app.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#95My problem with any "Dead man switch" is the fact that none of these services seem to survive. Also, can you please write somewhere on the website what's your privacy policy? Is everything encrypted? if so, with what? By it's nature this kind of service will hold very sensitive information.
https://www.deadmansswitch.net/ (my service) has been running for 13 years now. I guess what you mean by "survive", but that's a pretty long time.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#96As someone who was in an abusive relationship for decades, and my girlfriend is getting out of an even more abusive relationship, there really should be more resources for this. Or maybe there are and there just needs to be a better way to communicate with the people who need this sort of thing.
Maybe iOS and Android should have abuse prevention as well as suicide prevention resources built into the operating system and phone app, just like accessibility and health support and find-my-phone and emergency calling, so everybody has them, and having something like that isn't a red flag.
https://support.apple.com/guide/iphone/make-emergency-calls-...
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#97Earlier quoted context omitted.
How is that not gobsmackingly obvious to you??! Look at the words you just typed. There are millions of other innocuous games whose names don't invoke death, men, capital punishment, gallows, prison, nooses, lynching, strangulation, hanging, suicide, murder, etc. For God's sake, pick one of those, instead of "hangman" and "dead man's switch". Might as well call it "Kill My Abusive Boyfriend". The whole point is NOT t…
"Kill my abusive boyfriend" sounds like a valuable service.
Many people are against capital punishment, even for abusive girlfriends/boyfriends.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#98Earlier quoted context omitted.
I've heard this before, but am not sure to what it refers. What is this fallacy? I always figured people could just get a restraining order or a concealed carry license if needed. Do the situations of abuse commonly preclude this?
Often, yes. Abusers are not just people who are occasionally randomly violent. They are people who are deeply controlling, and use violence as part of that control. If you're at all interested, I strongly recommend this very readable book on abuser psychology: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Does-He-That-Controlling-ebook/dp... It's also important to remember that our society spent centuries where women were effectively p…
Sounds like that book takes the heteronormative approach that abusers are always men and victims always women. That's problematic because it erases gay victims, lesbian victims, and straight male victims, all of whom already have even less cultural and legal support as victims than straight female victims do.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#99Earlier quoted context omitted.
Often, yes. Abusers are not just people who are occasionally randomly violent. They are people who are deeply controlling, and use violence as part of that control. If you're at all interested, I strongly recommend this very readable book on abuser psychology: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Does-He-That-Controlling-ebook/dp... It's also important to remember that our society spent centuries where women were effectively p…
Sounds like that book takes the heteronormative approach that abusers are always men and victims always women. That's problematic because it erases gay victims, lesbian victims, and straight male victims, all of whom already have even less cultural and legal support as victims than straight female victims do.
The book in fact addresses that point. The author was a DV counselor in court-ordered programs. The vast majority of the people he saw were straight men, so he wrote what he knew. He's not erasing anything.
Re: Show HN: Discreet dead man's switch for victims of domestic abuse
#100Earlier quoted context omitted.
Sounds like that book takes the heteronormative approach that abusers are always men and victims always women. That's problematic because it erases gay victims, lesbian victims, and straight male victims, all of whom already have even less cultural and legal support as victims than straight female victims do.
The book in fact addresses that point. The author was a DV counselor in court-ordered programs. The vast majority of the people he saw were straight men, so he wrote what he knew. He's not erasing anything.
I doubt many lesbian or straight male victims would assume they'd be helped by a book called "why does he do that" when they were abused by shes.