It doesn’t surprise me this has 433 comments (so far). Other than what you feed your child there is no topic that is more contentious among new, exhausted parents.
This is worse than tabs versus spaces.
Blessings to you all!
What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
541–550 of 644 posts
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#542Earlier quoted context omitted.
> That's not how it works, the first year is horrible. (...) things will get better when the kid grows older. Except when they won't. Our older daughter started having real sleep issues around when she was 1.5 years old. From that point on, every night was one of "those nights nothing works". Her sleeping schedule became quite consistent: roughly 21:00 - 05:00 if she didn't nap during the day, or 23:30 - 05:00 if she…
Glad this worked for you. For our kids, they do sports. Heavy duty sports, since age 2-3. Now they basically volunteer to sleep on their own. Bedtime is not a drag. Its a priviledge. And Its glorious. Every kid is different. But they are all energy machines. Starve the machine of energy, or use it all up, and the machine will go idle. .You have to find what sticks.
What counts as a heavy duty sport for a 2 year old?
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#543Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Obesity is 'you're going to die an early death because you're overweight'. No, its not. Even morbidly obese doesn’t mean that, though it statistically correlates with a greater reduction in expected lifespan. > 73.6% of American Adults over 20 years old are overweight. [...] I didn't correlate to eating disorders resulting in people being under weight - I've seen a decent amount of that too. Probably 5 to maybe eve…
Ok? Apologies for overstating. It does definitely impact mortality, with overweight meaning approximately 5 years earlier death, and obesity approx. 10. That is a significant percentage of life expectancy. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/oby.20023 Though I wasn’t claiming its relevance, rather replying to the prior posters apparent assertion that their suggested course of action was widely applicable…
Well, not applicable to wide people, anyway.
I’ll see myself out…
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#544Read the article, and many of the comments here. I have a hard time squaring a lot of the hard and fast rules against my own experience. Certainly one persons life can’t detract from large scale statistics. However, I have 6 children. They have all responded to methods of behavioral training in wildly different ways. My oldest two could not do sleep training. 10 months of trying for almost every night and they did no…
This. As a father of three kids it's sometimes fun to look at people going through this – you are the smartest person about kids if you don't own any yet and most stupid one with the second one if you realize that you can't reuse almost any knowledge you gained with your firstborn. By the time you have a third one, you've already accepted that they are all very different and you have to learn from them, grow with them and adapt.
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#545Earlier quoted context omitted.
> How about respecting every parents choices for their own family? The immense cacophonies that the industries in the US produce, eventually permate to, and induce chaos and problems in other countries. This includes medical industries. > You're obviously very heated and it's not constructive. Im not heated. Im not Angloamerican. This is not 'heated' discussion where I live. Avoid projecting your cultural paradigm to…
>Avoid projecting your cultural paradigm to random people on the Internet. Avoid being an absolute asshole who is impossible to have a level-headed discussion with. Your flying off the handle in this thread with judgement geared towards "random people on the internet" demonstrates that very well. It's clear that there will be no way to have a genuine, level-headed conversation with you. Enjoy your evening, or the res…
Im not being an asshole to anybody. Leaving aside the worldwide practice and the contradicting reasearch which people seem to just disregard when their personal experiences and biases weigh in, just like you have your own reasons for your strong bias that made you continue discussing this topic this heatedly (in your words), I have my own reasons too. I know various apparently-successful and 'well-adjusted' adults who were neglected as an infant. Only the people who are close to them can know the problems they face and the difficulties they have to go through. Its no joke. Its not difficult to conclude from a modicum knowledge of psychology and such first-hand cases that leaving alone an infant in its crib would easily do more damage - without even going into evolution, mammal species' behavioral traits or anything else complicated.
But as I said, we discussed enough. I replied out of courtesy one last time. So you too have a nice day.
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#546The fact that this is so commonplace in my culture (USA) is frustrating and enrages me. As a parent, it is your evolutionary instinct to comfort a crying infant. They are quite literally helpless and look to caretakers for all their needs. There's a deep seated biological reason it feels bad to ignore it. The fact that it is so uncommon in other cultures should make this obvious. What are the odds that the rest of th…
Another reason to avoid this "deep seated biological reason" based reasoning is that evolution is pretty slow. Our instinct "software" is still setup for 40k+ years ago. It doesn't change particularly quickly and evolutionarily the entirety of human history isn't really a lot. Let alone human history in anything resembling a civilization.
So it easily follows that our adaptations from a time when we didn't have the luxury of stressing over how to ensure our kids grow into mentally healthy adults are not necessarily valid now regardless of how right we're wired to feel about them.
The idea of infants innocently crying because they need care only works if you assume their instincts are adapted to the modern world, whereas for prehistoric humans it was because it's more conducive to their survival to be somewhat needy yet quick to adjust when that neediness isn't responded to (as constant neediness might've led to abandonment back then).
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#547Earlier quoted context omitted.
Because it's a chemical ! A hormone ! Because you're dosing your kid with a drug ! You're taking the easy way out! You're using a shortcut to cover for your inability to endure the first few days of ${sleep training method}! These and similar kinds of bullshit judgements.
I think this is born out of puritan ethics attached to counter-culture “pure” living. Essentially all desired outcomes must be earned through righteous, hard work. Anything short of this effort is cheating.
For me, it’s out of respect for the body’s natural methods of dealing with problems. Obviously there are some cases where it’s useful to interfere with the body’s processes.
But in general humans are extremely complex. We tend to think that we have a better understanding of things than we actually do. The human body does things that we still don’t understand fully, and unless there’s an incredibly clear understanding or benefit of some treatment, I’m hesitant to try to change it. Mostly because of how much I know that we don’t know yet.
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#548Is American kids abandoning their parents in old age homes revenge for their parents sleep training them and not co-sleeping?
No, it isn't.
Re: What happens when babies are left to cry it out?
#549Earlier quoted context omitted.
You might be aware of the pathway that generates melatonin. It begins with tryptophan, which can be converted either into niacin or serotonin. Taking a niacin supplement with tryptophan will boost the opposing pathway. Serotonin is itself the source of all melatonin. Adjusting diet is not as controversial as a hormone supplement. Do not attempt this while taking an SSRI, which can be deadly.
> Do not attempt this while taking an SSRI, which can be deadly Attempt what, taking vitamin B3 and SSRI antidepressants?
I think the op is talking about anything that helps create serotonin whilst taking a serotonin reuptake inhibitor is a bad idea and I agree....
I have seen the results of MDMA + SSRI when I was at a party many many years ago... The seizure that person had was full body ... All their muscles were tense... It was lucky we got them to hospital asap as they almost died (30 minutes to live the doctors said) and even at that point needed to be put in a medically induced coma for days... (I took this person to the hospital and heard the rest from the person's family)