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Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

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Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#491
post #107

The things that annoy you the most about your partner will be the same things that you will miss the most when they are gone. I try and reflect on this advice when I am struggling to communicate with my wife. Having been divorced once I feel that a positive living relationship is always (well, usually maybe) within our own control.

> The things that annoy you the most about your partner will be the same things that you will miss the most when they are gone.

absolutely not. don't miss any of the annoyances, and my life is immensely better.

to quote someone else: "you know why divorces are so expensive? cuz they're worth it."

Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#492
post #169

One thing I read on HN a couple of month back and really clicked with me is: "If you really struggle to decide between two options and you begin to waste time by postponing the decision, this often indicates, that both options are very similar in expectable outcome" At least in situations, where you can't access more info about path A or B, indecisiveness may indicate "go flip a coin" Sounds simple, but made me aware…

the freakonomics podcast had a bit about this, "the wisdom of quitting".

and a follow up about coin flips for sufficiently abstract or complex decisions.

Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#493
post #110

Some thoughts about taking responsibility. From an old boss: “Excuses are like assholes. Everyone got one and they all stink.” From a friend’s dad who was an excellent trial attorney: “If you’re explaining you’re losing.” From my kids 4th grade teacher: “While that may explain, it does not excuse.”

> “If you’re explaining you’re losing.”

that was Reagan, IIRC

Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#495
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."

- Theodore Roosevelt, 26th President of the U.S

Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#496
When I was a young teenager I was very interested in model rockets. One summer day I had completed a model rocket and my father took me to the highschool football field to set it off. I got concerned because there were no trespassing signs. My father said the following:

"Josh, what's the worst that could happen? Someone will tell us to leave and we will."

This thinking, "what's the worst that could happen" has had a long profound impact on my approach to life and to risks in general. Always ask yourself in a situation of fear: what's the worst that could happen?

Re: Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

#500
post #140

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is a totally fair question, and I have to admit I did not - nuanced stories don’t fit in an online comment! The Great Recession hit and Obama’s climate push failed[0], so I went into healthcare (as another thing that needed fixing, and which there was political will to do something about). The lessons of all of those twists are more complex, but I still firmly believe that I got the right advice given what every…

This reminds me of a tale told by Lawrence Block: There's an old story about a young man who cornered a world-famous violinist and begged to be allowed to play for him. If the master offered him encouragement, he would devote his life to music. But if his talent was not equal to his calling, he wanted to know ahead of time so he could avoid wasting his life. He played, and the great violinist shook his head. "You lac…

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