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Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

nytimes.com

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Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#361

Post by jgalt212 »

KurtMueller wrote: post #357
nullify88 wrote: post #303

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My current girlfriend and I matched 2 years ago on Tinder. It was my 3rd attempt at trying it again after closing my account twice after no success. I changed my tactic, and paid for Tinder Gold / Plus and bought booster packs. I played their game and eventually they let me win.

What was your old tactic, why wasn't it effective, and what is your new tactic, and why is that effective? :)

It sounds like there is no free lunch, so he paid for the lunch and it tasted just fine.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#362

Post by dspillett »

bglusman wrote: post #330
LeonM wrote: post #203

I've tried a number of dating websites in the past year, and all of them are like this. First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. The matching algorithms don't really exist, they are extremely primitive and usually optimised for engage…

I don't know about the ratios (or how a user looking through could really tell what the true ratio is) but as far as none of them having a decent matching algorithm... I'm a big fan of OkCupid here... (I know they were aquired by match but they still operate independently AFAIK) I interviewed for them 12-13 years ago but never worked there, but they were Harvard math guys who founded SparkNotes and "opensouced" an ea…

> couldn't find original blog post

When match.com bought them a number of posts about the inner workings, along with any posts that were critical of paid dating sites, were quickly taken down, and they took some effort to chase down exact copies hosted elsewhere and demand they be taken down too.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#363

Post by saddestcatever »

goatinaboat wrote: post #172
fortran77 wrote: post #55

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It would be nice to have a dating site where potential matches were verified, including height, weight, and photo. Perhaps have them visit a kiosk in a participating business to get a photo taken from a standard angle (no "myspace" angles) along with a verified height and weight (stand on a scale!)

potential matches were verified, including height, weight I am happily married now (met my wife through a mutual friend, the old fashioned way) so my experience of online dating may be obsolete but women on dating sites tend to be very specific about their partner’s height. And income, and what car he drives and a big shopping list of mainly physical and materialistic traits. If you could verify all of that you might…

> How you attract the men to your platform is up to you...

Women. Period. If you have women, then men will come. And they'll jump through absolutely every hoop and hurdle to do so.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#364

Post by onepointsixC »

jellicle wrote: post #352
notyourday wrote: post #272

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. In my empirical observation it is not correct. Dating is local. The proportion of men and women on the sites in a locality will roughly match the proportion of men to women in the dating pool…

This. The experience of women on dating sites is this: lots of messages from men that basically say (often exactly this): "Wanna fuck?" Like, that's the whole message. Except there's almost always multiple misspellings, no matter how short the message is. So it's more like "U wanna fuk?". And then those men go on their local message boards and complain that no one is responding to that pithy, well-crafted message and…

"It's really not that hard. Lots of humans have successfully mated with other humans. You can too!"

The overwhelming majority did so without the use of online dating. I think that speaks more to the quality of online dating than anything else.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#365

Post by missosoup »

apexalpha wrote: post #217

There is only one universal law that applies to online dating, and that is: women don't need it as much as men. For women, online dating just doesn't make sense. Even on Tinder, where the ratio is kinda okay, women are bombarded with messages and likes. To the point that they can't even respond to everyone even if they wanted to. This means men are left with unresponsive women and just start to send cheaper pick up l…

> women don't need it as much as men.

This is only half the story. The full story goes:

Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete.

Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#366

Post by reroute1 »

unicornfinder wrote: post #227
tiglionabbit wrote: post #209

Earlier quoted context omitted.

OKCupid doesn't have fake profiles, right?

I'd say OKcupid is better than most (the higher barrier to entry i.e. having to answer questions) helps to a degree but there's still plenty of fake / scammer accounts.

But you don't even have to answer those

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#367

Post by body12 »

jellicle wrote: post #352
notyourday wrote: post #272

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. In my empirical observation it is not correct. Dating is local. The proportion of men and women on the sites in a locality will roughly match the proportion of men to women in the dating pool…

This. The experience of women on dating sites is this: lots of messages from men that basically say (often exactly this): "Wanna fuck?" Like, that's the whole message. Except there's almost always multiple misspellings, no matter how short the message is. So it's more like "U wanna fuk?". And then those men go on their local message boards and complain that no one is responding to that pithy, well-crafted message and…

The number of men in the US aged 18-30 reporting no sex in the previous year has almost tripled since 2010 [1]. It seems there are economic or cultural factors at play besides not well-crafting their messages or showering enough.

[1] https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/03/29/share-ame...

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#368

Post by magduf »

missosoup wrote: post #365
apexalpha wrote: post #217

There is only one universal law that applies to online dating, and that is: women don't need it as much as men. For women, online dating just doesn't make sense. Even on Tinder, where the ratio is kinda okay, women are bombarded with messages and likes. To the point that they can't even respond to everyone even if they wanted to. This means men are left with unresponsive women and just start to send cheaper pick up l…

> women don't need it as much as men. This is only half the story. The full story goes: Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete. Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands, and as a man I've had plenty of success finding women to date (not so much in finding someone I have any interest in marrying though; there aren't that many attractive women left in the US at this age (because Americans are fat), and the ones who are left have severe problems).

I really think that most people who are critical of online dating are only looking at one demographic, being people who are 25 or under.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#369

Post by magduf »

LeonM wrote: post #283
stochastic_monk wrote: post #257

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I know plenty of straight couples who are married or in committed long term relationships and met on tinder.

I think there is a big early adopter advantage of any dating platform. After a while, the platform just deteriorates and starts attracting opportunists. I also know a bunch of couples that met on tinder, but it's all from 3 years ago. I haven't heard of someone else who has been successful in finding a long term relationship on Tinder since.

That's because quality people have all moved on to something else. Tinder is mainly for hookups now: people who are traveling and want something casual, people who are married and want a 3some, people who are cheating, etc.

Everyone else has moved on to a better dating site, like Bumble, CMB, OKC, etc.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#370

Post by missosoup »

magduf wrote: post #368
missosoup wrote: post #365

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> women don't need it as much as men. This is only half the story. The full story goes: Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete. Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands, and as a man I've had plenty of success finding women to date (not so much in finding someone I have any interest in marrying though; there aren't that many attractive women left in the US at this age (because Americans are fat), and the ones who are left ha…

> but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands

Yes. There's tons of them because they can't get a husband and the supply/demand curve inverts across the genders. The time to secure a husband was back in their 20s when they were on the favourable side of the curve. Those women are pursuing partners that pursue much younger women.

To cut it short, female overall partner disirability peaks in their 20-30s and then falls off. Male continues rising until their 80s.

Dating apps are amplifying this effect but are also amplifying its downside, across both genders. Is this a net win or lose for society? Idk, you decide.

[1] https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-cheats-more-the-demographics-...

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