351–360 of 508 posts
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I don't get why Match.com, OkCupid should converge to a Tinder-like working model if they share ownership. I guess that there are different niches of people for those different websites/apps, no?
Perhaps so that later on they can transition all OKC users onto Tinder and maintain only one product?
I've tried a number of dating websites in the past year, and all of them are like this. First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. The matching algorithms don't really exist, they are extremely primitive and usually optimised for engage…
> First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. In my empirical observation it is not correct. Dating is local. The proportion of men and women on the sites in a locality will roughly match the proportion of men to women in the dating pool…
The experience of women on dating sites is this: lots of messages from men that basically say (often exactly this): "Wanna fuck?" Like, that's the whole message. Except there's almost always multiple misspellings, no matter how short the message is. So it's more like "U wanna fuk?". And then those men go on their local message boards and complain that no one is responding to that pithy, well-crafted message and they can't find a spouse to settle down with and raise a family.
Put some effort into it. Wear a collared shirt. Brush your hair. Take a shower. Spellcheck. Find your smartest friend to help you make your profile. Don't pick things off your feet and eat them. Try to be funny.
It's really not that hard. Lots of humans have successfully mated with other humans. You can too!
Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…
You’ve perhaps forgotten 7. Call men incels because they’re not bowing down and bending over backwards to modern feminism. To everyone else, get off of dating apps, and if you’re looking for a serious partner for a solid long-term family, find someone from an eastern society, and preferably move to that part of the world. Enjoy whatever lays you get here, but do not get married. Society in the western world is no lon…
You sound like the AlphaBay founder sheesh
I've tried a number of dating websites in the past year, and all of them are like this. First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. The matching algorithms don't really exist, they are extremely primitive and usually optimised for engage…
I know one French dating website, AdopteUnMec, where it's free for women and paying for men, the owner are claiming the user split is 50-50 between men and women. But I've never used it, so I don't know how well it works.
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> I'd say it's about 80% male. It's more like most women will go for 20% of the men. If you're part of the 80% you'll feel alone. As an experiment just make a fake profile with some model's picture to discover how many women are around.
there was an interesting data-analysis blog-post about this, I think i found it on HN but right now I can't find it. It presents some evidence that your statement is very true. edit: here it is https://web.archive.org/web/20170330131859/https://theblog.o...
https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater/tinder-experiments-ii-g...
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Yeah, no. Noone needed to read some long ranty message to the end, on the "long form" dating websites of the past. And I doubt there were even that many long form messages from men, given how many women complained in their profiles that they don't respond to "Hi! How're you?" and demanded men to put more effort in.
That's exactly what the long-form dating sites brought to women's inboxes. It was either tomes that would assemble into "War and Peace" within a couple of months without her participation, greatest hits like "So I'm in your area and I am just going to say I'm horny, how about we go to a motel and you give me a blow job" or "Hi. How are you". Think of it as her being a customer and you being a sales person at Best Buy…
Well that's the wrong approach right there. I'm glad to serve the needs of the other person, but I'll not approach someone with this mindset at the beginning (like sales people have to do).
My approach at the beginning is that of exploration, and careless fun. I certainly don't want to start a relationship in a subservient role.
Anyway, how's tinder any better?
d) You walk up to someone, start opening your mouth for a word, and they swipe you aside, ignoring you.
This weird liking of online interactions to real life ones doesn't really work. People act differently online, just a fact of life. Someone saying "Hi, how're you?" online may just end up being quite fine in real life. Not sure about the dickpic people though. LOL
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I know plenty of straight couples who are married or in committed long term relationships and met on tinder.
My current girlfriend and I matched 2 years ago on Tinder. It was my 3rd attempt at trying it again after closing my account twice after no success. I changed my tactic, and paid for Tinder Gold / Plus and bought booster packs. I played their game and eventually they let me win.
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Dating apps are a failed idea. If you're a man and have any imperfections appearance-wise you'll go on these sites and get no responses. In college I did hundreds of swipes and sent a bunch of messages on OKC and got nothing because I wasn't a human Ken doll. I could've spent all day in the gym and gotten plastic surgery and spent hundreds on whatever wardrobe was in style but why do all that for people who can't app…
The people on dating apps aren't really bad. The problem is the male-female asymmetry. On most dating sites men outnumber women five to tenfold. Additionally, most guys will spam likes and messages to hundreds of women. The hyper selectivity of women on these sites is mostly the result of trying to keep their heads above water. You should be aware that the "experiments" people have posted online aren't necessarily un…
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I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness by the continuous flow of likes they get. It is a morale booster, nothing more.
I know plenty of straight couples who are married or in committed long term relationships and met on tinder.
I think it's a fatal flaw in the dating site business model, to be honest. Their incentive is for you to stay on the site for as long as possible. If you could find a relationship quickly and then they would leave the site quickly. This would reduce the amount of ad and subscription revenue, in addition to reducing the size of the pool of "potential matches", discouraging those who have more trouble finding someone.
Okcuipd (and Sparknotes!) co-founder Christian Rudder wrote an article entitled "Why You Should Never Pay For Online Dating" saying exactly that. When Match Group acquired them, they took it down. I found a mirror, though. https://web.archive.org/web/20190429100515/https://static.iz...
Seems like a good potential revenue source, although it might require a little bit too much honesty for their taste.