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Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

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Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#31

Post by danso »

anothergoogler wrote: post #26
_sdegutis wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm able to pass interviews very well, but when it comes down to doing senior level programming stuff, I really suck at it. I tried rewriting old.editfight.com the other week in React + Express + TypeScript and it took me 3 days just to get the basic boilerplate working. But I can tell an interviewer what big-O notation means and can write a working fizzbuzz using functional programming techniques in ESNext. Even if…

It takes everybody several days to get the boilerplate working. The people who do it in an hour are using some cookie-cutter like yeoman and have a bunch of tooling/config in their project they don't understand.

Yes, I have to concur with this. I think of myself has relatively experienced, but it takes me generally a day to get new boilerplate working. This includes time to read documentation and get things set up and to get a start in understanding how things differ from what I usually use.

The amount of software you've produced and published using a variety of stacks -- Objective C, Cocoa, Swift, JS, Node, Clojure -- and APIs is really impressive. Most people haven't even tinkered with that many things, nevermind publish stuff out for the public to use. That last part is an extremely high hurdle, especially since it requires UI/UX skills and user empathy.

Hell, even your portfolio website is far-above par for any software engineer. Not just in content, but the well-considered layout and visual design.

I don't want to downplay your situation, you indeed have an uphill climb. But you do have skills and actual experience that put you in higher probability at success with software publishing, compared to most software engineers who were to find themselves forced to find employment without the ability to network or get recommendations. Hopefully you can find success again in iOS publishing. I think many if not most iOS developers would be envious of the variety in just your iOS portfolio.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#33

Post by rabboRubble »

_sdegutis wrote: post #30
b_f wrote: post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> So should submitter be subject to legal scrutiny, monitoring, and restraint on behavior after that single event? Having caught the post while it was still up, a second, identical incident happened four years after the initial occurrence.

Yep. I wasn't very cooperative with treatment after the first incident. I was very defensive. I felt that I needed to protect myself from the unfair world. That mindset prevented me from healing as a person and receiving proper treatment. It's interesting to look at both of my HN accounts. I can actually see my gradual mental deterioration and then gradual recovery.

Okay, well if there were two incidents I think you were exactly the type of person that needed judicial restraint.

A couple of additional thoughts... 1) I do wish for your career and employment success going forward - society is better if you and your wife are successful in life, and 2) there is something "hinky" about your writing style and the way you describe your sexual & criminal indiscretions and employment difficulties. If you went around flashing 30 year old women, your behavior was still wrong and the type of behavior that indicates possible escalation to even more criminal and violent behavior. Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter.

I have to wonder if that sense of strangeness is also apparent in your face to face demeanor. The type of strangeness that, in conjunction with a negative criminal background check, would eliminate a candidate for me. I've been threatened with physical violence and followed from time to time. I do not want to associate with people that cause me to seriously consider concealed carry.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#34

Post by dragonwriter »

_sdegutis wrote: post #4
mkempe wrote: post #3

Can you change your legal name?

In terms of solving harassment issues, it wouldn't help. My address and new name will still pop up on the registry. In terms of getting a job, yes, I could get a name change, but I feel like that would be unethical. If a company wouldn't want to hire me knowing my past, then hiding it from them so they would hire me seems really wrong.

So, disclose it when asked a relevant question, but get a name change anyway. It might be the media directly tied to you that companies are avoiding as much as your past: inevitably, your name will be attached to the company publicly (most likely) and they may not want that kind of 2-step search connection.

I get the ethical concern about hiding something that would be a deal breaker, so don't do that. But also don't create an unnecessary PR issue for a potential employer.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#35

Post by _sdegutis »

rabboRubble wrote: post #33
_sdegutis wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yep. I wasn't very cooperative with treatment after the first incident. I was very defensive. I felt that I needed to protect myself from the unfair world. That mindset prevented me from healing as a person and receiving proper treatment. It's interesting to look at both of my HN accounts. I can actually see my gradual mental deterioration and then gradual recovery.

Okay, well if there were two incidents I think you were exactly the type of person that needed judicial restraint. A couple of additional thoughts... 1) I do wish for your career and employment success going forward - society is better if you and your wife are successful in life, and 2) there is something "hinky" about your writing style and the way you describe your sexual & criminal indiscretions and employment dif…

> Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter.

It does matter. It makes it worse that they were still in formative years.

> I have to wonder if that sense of strangeness is also apparent in your face to face demeanor.

I think what's coming off as "strangeness" in my writing to a lot of people here, is that it seems like I'm treating what I did very casually, like it was just something that happened. But it's just that I'm so panicked over how we literally don't have money for next month's bills, and not sure where that's going to come from, that I really can't spend any energy on anything else. The guilt of what I did has weighed me down a lot and slowed me down, and I can't afford that, so I have to shut out everything else around me and just focus on solving this one gigantic problem right in front of me, of how to avoid my family becoming homeless and starved this summer because of my past actions. That's all I can think of.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#36

Post by moltar »

_sdegutis wrote: post #14
danso wrote: post #13

> All the software jobs that I had were opportunities given to me out of compassion and charity. But I wasn't qualified for them. I've always had attention span difficulties. Each of my open source projects were done out of excitement. I had an idea of how to automate something, and I just went for it, and could focus on it for weeks at a time. What do you mean that you weren't "qualified"? For all of your legal issu…

I'm able to pass interviews very well, but when it comes down to doing senior level programming stuff, I really suck at it. I tried rewriting old.editfight.com the other week in React + Express + TypeScript and it took me 3 days just to get the basic boilerplate working. But I can tell an interviewer what big-O notation means and can write a working fizzbuzz using functional programming techniques in ESNext. Even if…

Hahahaha it takes everyone this much time to set it up. That’s just the state of JS these days.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#37

Post by moltar »

_sdegutis wrote: post #19
pluto9 wrote: post #18

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And yet you have a number of useful and interesting projects on Github. That stack takes quite a lot of twiddling configuration files and piecing together disparate libraries and unrelated tools, at least on the frontend, and especially so if JavaScript UI frameworks aren't your area of expertise. 3 days is not that surprising. How about starting a SAAS lifestyle business? There are a number of threads on this site o…

Thanks will look into it.

Check Indie Hackers for inspiration.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#38

Post by rabboRubble »

_sdegutis wrote: post #35
rabboRubble wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Okay, well if there were two incidents I think you were exactly the type of person that needed judicial restraint. A couple of additional thoughts... 1) I do wish for your career and employment success going forward - society is better if you and your wife are successful in life, and 2) there is something "hinky" about your writing style and the way you describe your sexual & criminal indiscretions and employment dif…

> Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter. It does matter. It makes it worse that they were still in formative years. > I have to wonder if that sense of strangeness is also apparent in your face to face demeanor. I think what's coming off as "strangeness" in my writing to a lot of people here, is that it seems like I'm treating what I did very casually, like it was just so…

>> Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter.

>It does matter. It makes it worse that they were still in formative years.

You are not wrong about the comparative "worse". But going around flashing people for your gratification is deviant behavior. Flashing over-18 women is wrong. Flashing underaged young women is even more wrong. This is exactly what I mean about "hinky". Your tone is defensive even as you are entirely correct.

I have a challenge for you. Take that entire blog post, rewriting and summarize it in 100 words or less. Then spend the rest of the blog post on what you can actually do for an employer and why your past won't affect a future employer. Sell yourself. The blog post as is crap if the intent is to sell yourself.

Re: Career Post-Mortem, or: How flashing teenager girls can ruin your life

#39

Post by dismantlethesun »

rabboRubble wrote: post #38
_sdegutis wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter. It does matter. It makes it worse that they were still in formative years. > I have to wonder if that sense of strangeness is also apparent in your face to face demeanor. I think what's coming off as "strangeness" in my writing to a lot of people here, is that it seems like I'm treating what I did very casually, like it was just so…

>> Not sure from your post whether or not you realize the age of woman does not matter. >It does matter. It makes it worse that they were still in formative years. You are not wrong about the comparative "worse". But going around flashing people for your gratification is deviant behavior. Flashing over-18 women is wrong. Flashing underaged young women is even more wrong. This is exactly what I mean about "hinky". You…

He already said he is a criminal, that he knows those criminal acts are 'bad things', and that he will not do them again, and has help to ensure he won't do them again.

I don't know what more you want. He's already prostrated himself as much as we can require.

Disclaimer:

I would not hire him either. Unfortunately, sexual crimes are the sort that incline you to also other lesser pursuits like sexual harassment, and I can't bring that into my workplace. Additionally, no one in society would ever forgive me for hiring him if he does reoffend.

2012 was only 6 years ago. If it was 15 years ago, it would be a different story.

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