31–40 of 249 posts
Go for a free Vipassana meditation course: https://www.dhamma.org/en/locations/directory https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTwaTk26qbE
Take your wife partner dancing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9xxeWRxSbA
Good Luck!
Hey, OP. Impostor syndrome sucks. Everyone has it. This industry is a bunch of nerds (and this part is not pejorative, I am one) who spent most of their lives being identified by how smart they were and they are culturally incentivized (and this one is pejorative, because tech culture is trash, but it's not your fault unless you perpetuate it, so don't!) to be desperate to win the approval of their peers by how bulgi…
I was pretty discouraged after that, but all you can do is go on to the next one with an open mind. There are lots of great opportunities out there. A lot of interviewers understand nerves and will take that into account
The book offers a fascinating study of the way that meaning drives and sustains us.
Tell me about something you accomplished today. Tell me about something you accomplished last week. Tell me about something you intend to accomplish next month. Give us a view of your world from a positive perspective. In doing so, you'll find not everything is bad. This is the first step in the right direction.
Read over this paragraph:
My thoughts are descending into the darkest reaches. Death doesn't seem so bad anymore. Then I don't have to think about all this.
When a person is in a state like this, his/her brain has difficulty processing things in his/her usual way. Consequently, he/she could easily read your questions and conclude, "I haven't accomplished anything today. I'm an idiot and a complete failure."
If you have to preach the positive, try to frame it in terms of gratitude. Accomplishments are very dangerous, particularly if you're dealing with someone who could be in the throes of a major depression.
Tell me about something you accomplished today. Tell me about something you accomplished last week. Tell me about something you intend to accomplish next month. Give us a view of your world from a positive perspective. In doing so, you'll find not everything is bad. This is the first step in the right direction.
For lifting weights, google "beginner workout program." Always, always, always focus on "form" over the amount of "weight" you lift. This pays in dividends as you progress.
For running, there's usually a local trail that everyone goes to. Just use that, and start running. Even if you just walk it'll do wonders for your intellectual life, and imaginative powers.
Anyways, ending my new-agey rant. I can relate to you, and found these things helpful for me. Don't hesitate to shoot me a message, and I'd be happy to give you some pointers.
You have classic signs of depression. Perhaps major depression. The worst part of depression is that it clouds normal thought processes. That's probably why you can't perform as you once did. Find a way to see a psychiatrist you feel comfortable around. Go with a family or friend if that helps get you over the hump. So many high achievers I know go through this. You're not alone, and with proper help you'll get throu…
For some reason there can be a stigma around that profession but PLEASE don't let that deter you, as it will be tremendously helpful. They can help you see your true self when things seem cloudy.
Hey, OP. Impostor syndrome sucks. Everyone has it. This industry is a bunch of nerds (and this part is not pejorative, I am one) who spent most of their lives being identified by how smart they were and they are culturally incentivized (and this one is pejorative, because tech culture is trash, but it's not your fault unless you perpetuate it, so don't!) to be desperate to win the approval of their peers by how bulgi…
While I largely agree with your main thrust, I must take issue with this. Many of us (older generation perhaps?) were culturally incentivized to not exhibit any of our nerdiness, and were ostracized or worse for doing so. Many of us developed a "dumber" external persona and explicitly avoided demonstrating cognitive excellence specifically because of negative social incentives regarding being a nerd.