Live data from Hacker News

Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

compylr.com

251–260 of 356 posts

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#251
post #25

Wow, it's like everything that I used to fear about the dating world put into one shiny app. Had this been out years ago when I was single, it would've definitely given me a lot of anxiety. Having been happily married for 5 years, all I can say to single folks is that if someone actively rates people on apps/sites like this, they are most likely not the kind of people you want to be with in the long run. As for the s…

Not to mention, female privilege lets them call men "creepers" or "perverts" without question. I've pressed female friends about this and they just answer with "I didnt like the look he gave me" or "we just didnt click." So instead of understanding that most people are not compatible, we're now building a db to slander them based on purely emotional reasoning? If women are using this then it says a lot about the woma…

Until we, as a society, can stop blaming women for their rapes (she was so sloshed, what did she think would happen when she got into bed with him?) women are going to be EXTREMELY conservative about these kinds of things.

When it's your fault if he rapes you, you put "creepy" on a hair trigger.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#252
Honestly, I don't think that this is particularly sexist at all. My only issue is the massive double standard in the media and culture that takes a pass on this but would raise hell if someone released the same exact app with the genders reversed.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#253
post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Men have been getting the good end of sexual discrimination for centuries. Not really. Men have had more freedom but less security. Just because you personally like your gender role (as it seems), that doesn't mean other men agree (or agreed in the past). Sure, men were allowed to be employees and women cared for the children at home (though reality was actually a lot more complex than that, but we can accept this c…

> Men have had more freedom but less security. This isn't true no matter how you slice it. Men had more economic security because they could work, whereas most women could not. Men have bodily security in ways women do not, esp. in regards to sexual assault and domestic violence. > men had to work or they wouldn't find a women to marry I think you have this backwards. Men didn't have to marry. However, since women at…

>This isn't true no matter how you slice it. Men had more economic security because they could work, whereas most women could not. Men have bodily security in ways women do not, esp. in regards to sexual assault and domestic violence.

In a marriage the women of course benefits from the man's income to provide economic security. They've also had the security of not dying in senseless wars, and the security of men defending women from danger as is the gender norm even today.

>I think you have this backwards. Men didn't have to marry. However, since women at large could not work and support themselves, many had no choice but to be attached to someone who could work. Due to past stigmas about women were not married, this put women in a position where getting married was a near necessity.

I never claimed that men had to marry, though most of them wanted to (to gain access to sex if nothing else). Men didn't have the option to not work and marry, while had to work to marry, and women didn't have the option to work and not marry.

>Not only would women have little recourse but to marry someone, but women by far were expected to should domestic duties. That is a lot of work and is a full time job in and of itself.

I'd say domestic duties were significantly easier than the typical hard work in the past. Workplace safety was non-existent, for starters. That's of course in addition to military duty and dying in wars.

>This is blatantly not true. There is a ton of written and academic research work on gender, sexism, etc. and women's studies is a real academic discipline.

Women's studies is not an empirical science, if they start from an axiom which doesn't require evidence.

>Men are much more able to pursue the less freedom and less responsibility life, as you put it, compared to women because of how they are treated in society at large. Historically most women did not have the option for the less freedom and less responsible life since they would either be pigeonholed into domestic care or they would have been working poor.

That's of course blatantly not true. Men who didn't work were deemed pretty worthless, and no women would marry them. Besides, they would starve on streets or something, while a women could marry someone and not need to work.

>This is plainly not true. Most women still earn less than their male counterparts.

I said young women. Please try reading what I'm actually saying :). As for the whole pay gap, it's explained through men working 20% more hours per year and making career choices that focus on income.

>Further, women still suffer far more from domestic and sexual violence and have their bodies policed much more than men.

No, men are mutilated more than women (since male-only circumcision is legal in most countries). Also, majority of rape victims in USA are male: http://www.outsidethebeltway.com/men-outnumber-women-among-a...

>Gender inequality exists right now, even without something like Lulu, and will continue to exist for the foreseeable future. Having an app that deals with one aspect of that reality is totally legit.

What? This app doesn't prevent gender equality, it enforces it, along with stereotypical gender roles that discriminate both men and women equally. Only a misandrist can support this kind of app.

>Amazingly you say that there is no real research on women's studies, but then go on to conclude there is not problem at all.

Just because women's studies are based on non-empirical "science" doesn't mean there's no research on the subject. Like this: http://granum.uta.fi/granum/kirjanTiedot.php?tuote_id=18450

>Ah yes, saying men have it as hard as women, which is demonstrably not true at a societal level, will summon the PC police.

Good that you agree with me!

>The summary of that study tries to use misandry and matriarchy seriously to describe the social and political condition of a western country. This is laughable on its face.

Not an argument :).

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#254
post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Men have been getting the good end of sexual discrimination for centuries. Not really. Men have had more freedom but less security. Just because you personally like your gender role (as it seems), that doesn't mean other men agree (or agreed in the past). Sure, men were allowed to be employees and women cared for the children at home (though reality was actually a lot more complex than that, but we can accept this c…

> Men have had more freedom but less security. This isn't true no matter how you slice it. Men had more economic security because they could work, whereas most women could not. Men have bodily security in ways women do not, esp. in regards to sexual assault and domestic violence. > men had to work or they wouldn't find a women to marry I think you have this backwards. Men didn't have to marry. However, since women at…

>This isn't true no matter how you slice it

Yes, it is. Your views on historic gender roles do not reflect reality. Men were restricted by gender roles too, and their role was largely "go risk death to get a chance to provide for a woman and children".

http://www.psy.fsu.edu/~baumeistertice/goodaboutmen.htm

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#256

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not to mention, female privilege lets them call men "creepers" or "perverts" without question. I've pressed female friends about this and they just answer with "I didnt like the look he gave me" or "we just didnt click." So instead of understanding that most people are not compatible, we're now building a db to slander them based on purely emotional reasoning? If women are using this then it says a lot about the woma…

Until we, as a society, can stop blaming women for their rapes (she was so sloshed, what did she think would happen when she got into bed with him?) women are going to be EXTREMELY conservative about these kinds of things. When it's your fault if he rapes you, you put "creepy" on a hair trigger.

so now a socially awkward attempt to start a conversation with a woman means you're a rapist...

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#257

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Men as a sex have had advantageous circumstances and treatment for a long time, yes. That has absolutely nothing to do with men who are alive today . Perhaps you're a male who's OK with being the subject of discriminatory treatment over centuries of gain you didn't get to live through. I'm not, and I don't think anyone should be. Unless two wrongs make a right, discriminating against people who have not been a party…

" Men as a sex have had advantageous circumstances and treatment for a long time, yes. That has absolutely nothing to do with men who are alive today. " Let's talk about the gender ratio today in Congress, or among Fortune 500 CEOs. Let's talk about the recent study showing that given identical (fake) resumes for a lab manager position, scientists on average offer lower salary and less mentoring to female candidates.…

>Let's talk about the gender ratio today in Congress, or among Fortune 500 CEOs

Sure. But lets also talk about the gender ratio of prisoners, the homeless, suicides, workplace deaths, etc. It is fallacious to look only at the top 0.0001% of men and declare that men as a group have things better as a result. Men have a much greater variance in virtually every measurable aspect. Look at the entire spectrum.

http://www.psy.fsu.edu/~baumeistertice/goodaboutmen.htm

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#258
post #84
post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Men have been getting the good end of sexual discrimination for centuries. Not really. Men have had more freedom but less security. Just because you personally like your gender role (as it seems), that doesn't mean other men agree (or agreed in the past). Sure, men were allowed to be employees and women cared for the children at home (though reality was actually a lot more complex than that, but we can accept this c…

You've made a lot of soup out of a small amount of meat. Some quick replies to clear up misunderstandings: I agree that patriarchy is bad for men too. I disagree that it was equally bad for both genders. I disagree that we have reached balance. By "manning up", I don't mean reinforcing gender roles or maintaining gender inequality. I mean that men should, as the relatively privileged parties, not be whiny at either t…

You're enforcing the stereotypical gender role of men: "Don't whine, that's unmanly, don't complain, deal with your own problems". That's pretty offending to me.

I want people to treat other people as individuals, not representative of their gender. I don't care about my own gender role. I don't want people to say "man up" to men if I face some injustice. And I don't want (the reverse I guess) it happen to women either.

Your path doesn't lead to equality, it just slows down progress.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#259
post #150
post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You've made a lot of soup out of a small amount of meat. Some quick replies to clear up misunderstandings: I agree that patriarchy is bad for men too. I disagree that it was equally bad for both genders. I disagree that we have reached balance. By "manning up", I don't mean reinforcing gender roles or maintaining gender inequality. I mean that men should, as the relatively privileged parties, not be whiny at either t…

Not getting upset at inequalities means accepting them. This is the road to not getting rid of them.

Not at all. I forgive people their errors all the time without accepting them as good or normal.

For example, if somebody is tired and cranky and says something mean, I don't have to get upset at it. I can let it go, and treat them compassionately. I think that is precisely the road to getting rid of meanness.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#260
post #25

Wow, it's like everything that I used to fear about the dating world put into one shiny app. Had this been out years ago when I was single, it would've definitely given me a lot of anxiety. Having been happily married for 5 years, all I can say to single folks is that if someone actively rates people on apps/sites like this, they are most likely not the kind of people you want to be with in the long run. As for the s…

Indeed. This would become the first question I asked a woman when trying to date. If she's childish enough to use something like this, I'd have no problem saying sayonara. There should be some expectation of maturity and general couth in any relationship.

Indeed. If you decide to stop dating someone because of an application on their phone, you are the mature one and they are the child.
Post reply on HN