1) Increasingly, if you want to be in infosec, you have to learn how to code on the level of a SWE. This is how to not lose your mind when constantly addressing sec issues that others (devs) are entirely responsible for fixing. 2) Department of No doesn't have to be a thing, it just takes some emotional intelligence and pragmatism. 'Always saying no' is as much the fault of the sec eng as it is the system. If you hav…
I think this depends on what kind of infosec work you plan to be doing. I have been a security engineer for the past 4ish years, and while I do have some programming/scripting skills it certainly isn't at the level of a SWE. Most of the projects I work on I end up doing pentesting, risk assessments, remediation for compliance, assisting with policies/procedures, and/or security focused devops work. It would definitely be useful if I could program at the level of an SWE, and I do plan to continue to develop my skills, but I wouldn't say that to be in infosec you have to learn to code at the level of an SWE. I agree with all your other points