231–240 of 243 posts
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Sometimes it's even more fun and cozy in a tiny apartment. In a big house, the party often naturally squeezes into the kitchen, leaving the handful of introverts to sit quietly in the living room.
Haha! those introverts... sitting quietly, are actually talking one-to-one on some random deep subject.
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Well, as I said, it depends on a place. I usually go to places where people are going to play board games, pool, foosball etc. while getting few beers, not drink themselves unconsciously.
To each their own of course, but I find even mildly impaired people annoying. You don't realize how much an effect a few beers can have alcohol is deceptive that way, that's why you see people down a bottle of vodka and get behind the wheel. They honestly believe that they are fine to drive. A tip if you do decide to try this advice, don't let anyone know you aren't drinking. Not only will you often get accosted "Com…
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Right. It's not an issue of technology, for the most part, but it's the way American cities are designed. Instead of mixed-use walkable neighborhoods where people with a variety of incomes and backgrounds live, and stay put, we have suburban fortresses where people live in a box, never talk to their neighbors, drive a box to work, work in a box, then do it all over again. The national highway system was great for a n…
This is an extremely poor argument. Try starting a conversation on a Manhattan subway. The lack of boxes between you and your fellow commuters does not make it remotely acceptable to interact with them, nor should it. It is much harder to meet friends who are separated by 5 miles of bus ride than 5 miles of freeway. It is much harder to actually hear each other at a crowded bar than someone's home, but only the very…
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I always found Meetups impersonal and difficult to socialize in large crowds due to my debilating social anxiety. Btw, nobody showed up yesterday but I haven't given up. I'm here from 9am ~ 5pm near Robson Square. Coffee (or tea) is on me. If you are not in Vancouver then shoot me an email, you can talk about anything.
I found Meetup to be the same way for me. So I'm starting something that allows you to limit how many people can join and have the option to create plans without needing a Meetup Group. Check it out TheCoopApp.com and let me know what you think.
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As somebody else on the spectrum, how did you get to understand dating? I find that I miss so many cues, and there's a lot about human interactions that I don't understand.
I missed sooooo many cues. I started having much, much better luck in my mid-twenties when I just said fuck it, and started making moves on date 2 or 3 without trying to 'read the situation, see if she'd react favorably first'. And even after I started doing that I'd get women saying afterwards, "Phew! I thought you might not like me before you did that!" to which I'd always think "You're crazy! I would have ended th…
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I'm the same, except I actually found such a place: a 38-person student cooperative during my last year of college. I'm convinced living in a creaky old house with a varied cast of characters is the way to go for a happy and socially fulfilling life. College is almost a decade behind me, but I hope to find such a place again before I turn 30. (And one that's hopefully not 100% filled with startup folks... we need art…
Yes, I completely agree. The difficulty is finding the right people. And I don't think of this as being exactly the same as co-living or other movements. I'm not sure what to call it...but it requires a certain mindset...or maybe we're thinking of different setups. The "creaky old house" says a lot about the character of the people; I don't think that's a small detail--not that it would have to be a creaky old house,…
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This is going to sound terribly judgemental, but have you considered that the problem might lie with you? It sounds like you are doing exactly the right thing in terms of meeting new people but the fact that your results are very poor, seems to suggest you are not doing something correctly, or are putting people off in some way. Just show an interest in people, without being creepy. Respect boundaries but show you ar…
No, it's true, it's my problem. But I don't know what. I have good hygiene. I did a lot of research into fashion and purchased a well fitting wardrobe. I think I might come across as odd for reasons nobody will be honest with me about.
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meetup.com is a great website focused on helping people who live near each other meet and socialize. Highly recommend it.
Only around specific and punctual activities, and it's mostly city centric, not location or neighbor centric.
The topics I discuss at meetups I attend - software development, business development, and just geeky folks who like to discuss what they're hacking on - don't particularly have punctuality needs.
You have to organize it by some location metric. It would be cool to have more options - let the Meetup folks know what you'd like!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Zone
People are staring down in the cell phone screens instead of talking to strangers in social environments. Plus if one is looking at the phone one is not that approachable. Apps can connect people but also disconnect humans. Time for a debate on how to use new tech in a positive manner.
Even people that know each other sometime disconnect through tech for example friends going to a cafe together instead of talking using their cell phones.
We are using GPS instead of asking others for directions.
Robots are replacing cashiers and simple jobs at service desks.
I think it's valuable to think about this problem from an evolutionary perspective. Almost every problem we have can be viewed this way. We should be asking ourselves how we were living 100,000 years ago. This is what our bodies and our brains are expecting. The whole concept of the nuclear family and a house and a fence is a completely foreign concept to our bodies because we haven't been doing it for very many gene…
If that's the way we "should" be living, why then as a society did we mostly chose to live separately in family units? It must have a survival advantage or we would have stopped doing it.
I don't remember the name, but in an anthro class we discussed a culture where children were married as infants and raised together. This ends up being suboptimal because the kids identify each other as siblings and biology basically interferes with them developing a romantic relationship. As a result they end up taking romantic partners outside the arranged marriage. But hey, it still produces kids so the culture continued on, even with this suboptimal practice.
Likewise for tribes who practiced eating the brains of the deceased. It gives you a neurodegenerative disease, but the incubation period is sufficiently long so that you can still keep your population up.