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If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

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Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#221

Post by nradov »

tabtab wrote: post #173
sjjshzvuiajhz wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

People are constantly constructing internal narratives to explain their actions. From the perspective of the narrator, with a life’s worth of context, those actions fit into the narrative in a perfectly logical way. From the perspective of others who lack that context, those actions can seem illogical. Maybe you really are more logical than the people around you, but on the other hand you can’t read minds - maybe you…

I'm willing to share my reasoning and logic with anybody who asks, and will refine it if it lacks clarity. I enjoy having my logic tuned by other minds; it makes me even MORE logical to be challenged, even if it hurts my pride in the short-term. Others are not so open and don't want their thinking process challenged. I don't know why, other than pride, ego, or office politics. If you know why, please tell me. Don't b…

Are your colleagues unwilling to share their reasoning at all, or just not with you? Your comments here come across as arrogant and condescending. If your co-workers are picking up the same attitude from you then they won't be inclined to spend time explaining every little thing to you.

As you gain more real world experience you'll also find that logic isn't necessarily helpful for making good decisions in most circumstances.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#222

Post by gabriel34 »

webmobdev wrote: post #119
gabriel34 wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

mental health and gut bacteria seem to be heavily correlated. Anecdotally, if I don't eat sugary "reward" food I tend to feel better. That is also why I adopted intermittent fasting. I tend to fell better mentally if I fast 24h once a week.

How exactly do you fast? Is it like the extreme fasting of muslims where you don't eat or drink anything from dawn to dusk, or is it like the hindu fasting where you only eat fruits and vegetables?

water and coffee only, from dinner to dinner

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#223

Post by sjjshzvuiajhz »

tabtab wrote: post #216
sjjshzvuiajhz wrote: post #203

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We’ve never met, but from what you’ve said in this thread, it sounds like you have a low opinion of the people around you. You’re good at finding flaws. That’s a valuable skill, but when you direct that fault-finding toward other people, they will become defensive. It’s rarely productive to ask someone that was wrong, why did you do that? You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The pe…

Re: You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The person you’re questioning can perceive in your body language and tone of voice...Communication is hard... You are right, communicating is indeed hard. Achieving clarity, brevity, and social "friendliness" at the same time is a multi-skill that most people get wrong: they tend to do one or two well, but rarely all three. I will readily ag…

I’m not telling you to pretend to be nice, I’m telling you to actually be nice. You won’t have to hide those feelings of contempt because you won’t be feeling them. Before you start the conversation, get your brain in a place where you like the person you are talking to.

I used to be convinced I was autistic, I had a really hard time connecting with people. The median number of friends I had in my childhood was one. I might be on the spectrum, I definitely behave in a quirky way and I’m bad at small talk. But since I started taking the antidepressant I’ve had more positive thoughts about other people, which makes me nicer. Suddenly it’s easy to make friends. I went to a bar on Saturday and made a friend and he invited me to hang out at his place tonight. If you had told me that would happen five years ago I would have laughed in your face (or cried inside). Now it’s normal.

Most people want to like people. You have to give them reasons to not like you. If they sense aggression from you, that’s the best reason for them to not like you. You don’t have to play the part of a normal guy perfectly. You just have to be a decent person who doesn’t behave like they are surrounded by Ferengi.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#224

Post by unclebucknasty »

GlenTheMachine wrote: post #179
criddell wrote: post #169

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If in her mind all of the anger was justified, why did she ever go looking for a doctor and a diagnosis?

Two things. What she says was the most motivating one is oddly prosaic. She is a veterinarian. She has loved animals her entire life, considers them her guardian angels. We had finally moved into a rental house that allowed pets, so we got a dog, an Australian Shepherd rescue dog who turned out to be the best dog who ever lived. I took her all the way through advanced obedience classes. I don't really have the words…

Thanks for sharing those very poignant experiences. I can personally relate to having an emotional response to something that I then recognize as somehow askew. In fact, given the complexity of the human emotional apparatus, I'm betting we've all had the experience of a mismatched response through various insecurities, injuries, etc, that manifest as projection and other defense mechanisms.

The key to emotional health then, may come down to a question of degree and/or recognition when thinking is askew.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#225

Post by eeeeeeeeeeeee »

magduf wrote: post #135
kingsloi wrote: post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You actually hit it nail on the head. I'm a British guy who married an American woman and I've been in the US about 3 years now. I live in Gary, IN (the nice beach community, south of Lake Michigan) but the I hear the daily horror stories of things that occur here. I doesn't bother me too much, I think shit happens everywhere and we're good people (as in, we're not looking for trouble), and I was raised to have my gu…

I've seen YouTube videos of American expats coming back home and saying the one big thing they noticed, after spending significant time in someplace like Europe, was how utterly paranoid Americas are. I've felt this myself just after having a short vacation out of the country. It's not really unsafe here (unless you're in downtown Baltimore or Detroit or something), but everyone is just so paranoid that it feels like…

I'm not surprised by the paranoia. I think it's a natural reaction to the disgusting state of America, one which encourages a kill-or-be-killed mentality.

There is very little of a safety net if you fall through the cracks (and the safety net built up during the 20th century is rapidly being torn down). Health care costs are the number one cause of bankruptcy in America. And if you can't afford your rent/mortgage and don't have any family, well, you're screwed, you're homeless now. At least with your job you have some sense of control over that, you can work harder and better, but that doesn't always matter either. But the fact that you can lose everything over a health issue, that may be (and often is) due to no fault of your own, is obviously going to make people paranoid. It makes you feel entirely powerless and completely at the whim of an unjust system. I went to the ER for chest pains the other day, and I have health insurance, and the bill was $2500. Luckily I can afford that, but how many people could not? The system is basically screaming at you "just die already, we don't care about you."

All of these things encourage a state of fear, where we are all this close to being knocked down into destruction. I think paranoia is a natural reaction to our state of affairs, but obviously everyone handles it differently. Some even thrive in it, because they enjoy that level of brutal competition.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#226

Post by tabtab »

nradov wrote: post #221
tabtab wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm willing to share my reasoning and logic with anybody who asks, and will refine it if it lacks clarity. I enjoy having my logic tuned by other minds; it makes me even MORE logical to be challenged, even if it hurts my pride in the short-term. Others are not so open and don't want their thinking process challenged. I don't know why, other than pride, ego, or office politics. If you know why, please tell me. Don't b…

Are your colleagues unwilling to share their reasoning at all, or just not with you ? Your comments here come across as arrogant and condescending. If your co-workers are picking up the same attitude from you then they won't be inclined to spend time explaining every little thing to you. As you gain more real world experience you'll also find that logic isn't necessarily helpful for making good decisions in most circ…

Re: As you gain more real world experience you'll also find that logic isn't necessarily helpful for making good decisions in most circumstances.

I already mostly agreed to that elsewhere, because most activity and commerce is about "marketing" or politics of one kind or another. Kirk was Captain instead of Spock because Kirk better understood illogical aliens.

Re: Your comments here come across as arrogant and condescending.

I've practiced being logical, I enjoy being logical, and via experience I believe on average I AM more logical. My work in the craft of logic paid off there. True, I might suck at many other things, such as how to not SOUND condescending for stating sound logic. My apologies for not mastering the art of human interaction instead.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#227

Post by hateful »

Clinical Depression is often caused by a chemical imbalance, usually serotonin. It isn't being "sad" and doesn't usually have root cause in a certain event or direct emotion - though those things can trigger the already existing issue.

We have to remember that the term Depression in this sense doesn't mean what it means in the common sense. Just like words like "Theory" have different meanings in the common vernacular.

It's closer to Anxiety than it is to Sadness.

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#228

Post by ggm »

amriksohata wrote: post #220

Is there any data available for those more likely to be depressed ouf of these or similar categories: 1) Atheists 2) Creationists (of all religions) 3) Non practicising creationists (of all religions) I'm not promoting any of the above here but I would like to see if there is any correlation between those who believe in a higher purpose and whether they are less or more likely to feel existential depression as they f…

Stoicism feels like the best path out for a depressed athiest. "Best of all possible worlds" but without the theism

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#229

Post by [deleted] »

GlenTheMachine wrote: post #201
renholder wrote: post #191

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>But if your brain isn't working right that's a moral failure. See? That's that shit - right there - that makes mental health so stigmatised that people won't seek help.

Completely agree. To be clear, I'm not expressing this opinion. I'm agreeing with the parent that it's all too often the view of society, and that it actively prevents people from seeking help.

[deleted]

Re: If You're Often Angry or Irritable, You May Be Depressed

#230

Post by tabtab »

tabtab wrote: post #216
sjjshzvuiajhz wrote: post #203

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We’ve never met, but from what you’ve said in this thread, it sounds like you have a low opinion of the people around you. You’re good at finding flaws. That’s a valuable skill, but when you direct that fault-finding toward other people, they will become defensive. It’s rarely productive to ask someone that was wrong, why did you do that? You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The pe…

Re: You may have steel skin, but for most people, that feels like an attack. The person you’re questioning can perceive in your body language and tone of voice...Communication is hard... You are right, communicating is indeed hard. Achieving clarity, brevity, and social "friendliness" at the same time is a multi-skill that most people get wrong: they tend to do one or two well, but rarely all three. I will readily ag…

(Reply to "sjjshzvuiajhz" at this level because there's a message nesting limit on HN.)

Let me get this straight: you are insisting I "just feel" different? Just somehow make my brain like certain people? I realize there are books about forcing oneself to have different emotions, but they often don't work.

It's like asking a fan of classical music to just start liking hip-hip and vice-versa. "Just change your head". God doesn't hand out new brainware CD's.

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