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Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

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Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not that long ago you wrote here that you were building something and that you would be releasing it soon, how is that coming along ?

Still plugging away. It's Sunday morning here and I don't feel sick any more, so that's a big plus! Woo hoo! Hopefully I can get a lot more done today than yesterday. There are four delivery points. I'm hoping to make it to delivery point 1 in the next week and demo it here. Fair warning: it will be very lame, but each increment builds on the one before it and you have to start somewhere. Just working by yourself rea…

if you need to blow off steam and have a feeling that you are not as alone in this: twelve.truetech.com:6667 #tmc

But don't let it keep you from your work ;)

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#22
post #10
post #7

I partially credit keeping going on my startup with having told many of my coworkers about it before I left. Well, more accurately I say: "If I hadn't run my big mouth, telling everyone I was doing a startup, and don't want a job..." Yeah. I had no choice but to keep going. Not always the best thing though. Choice is good.

Have to fight other's choices every day: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braesss_Paradox

The link above has a typo:

here the correct one: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braess_paradox

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#23
post #9

> (you know, the one you really should be working on right now). This is the problem really. Don't compel yourself to do anything you don't want to. Don't guilt yourself into thinking that you should be doing something else instead of what you really want to do. Stop doing this in the name of productivity, efficiency, ambition, or goals. Instead, focus your energy on making yourself realize why something must be done…

I definitely use the same "big picture" approach to get through some less than fun tasks - and especially to stop doing things, for example, eating healthily (i.e. stopping eating crap) is part of the big picture of a thinner, fitter me.

A great piece of advice someone gave me, in line with the "If I truly don't want to do something I put myself in a situation where I don't have to", is simply "You don't have to do anything you don't want to". In context, of course. I don't have to eat healthily, but I want to, because I desire the end goal. Even stuff like paying taxes or cleaning my flat - I want to live in somewhere that's not a pigsty, I want to achieve the state of having done my tax return, etc. It's certainly led me to make much better use of my time, with regards pointless meetings and so on. I'm not being very erudite today but I hope that makes some sense.

However, small goals definitely work for me. On big-picture tasks where the end is far away, and there are unpleasant steps on the way, it's good to have smaller things to work to that enforce the belief that the goal is achievable in the first place.

On a side note, I love doing the dishes. I'm not married, so it's not the domestic bliss motivation, but there are two things I like about it. Firstly, somewhere over the last few years I mutated somehow, and I actually get a kick out of seeing a lovely clean kitchen with dishes all done (possibly boosted by the fact there are no dishes left to do!). Secondly, I find it's actually great thinking time, and my sink window has a great view. :-)

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#24
I'm kind of the opposite. I love to work in secret and have others underestimate me, so that when I do go public about a project, I deliver a nice shocking punch. Then I brag the hell out of it at that point.

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#25
post #16

This is not blackmail, it's called being "accountable". When you say you're going to do something, you do it. Again, this is not blackmail, this is how successful, trustworthy people operate every day. From your profile, you seem to understand this, but do others not? What is happening to this world when accountability has become a surprising new concept????

A surprising number of workplaces still do not understand the concept of accountability - I can say that they are frustrating places to work.

I agree with the original poster; there is no better way to get your goals accomplished than by publicizing them.

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#26
I do this sometimes, but it doesn't work that well. My problem is that the sort of people that matter to me, the people I'd tell about these goals, are exactly the sort of people who believe in me and support me and won't actually be that disappointed if I fail because they know I'll have tried my best. (Even if I haven't.) So I don't really fear looking like a fool in front of them at all.

Having to eat a nice serving of humble pie after you've told loads of people something's going to happen and it doesn't is unfortunate, but in my experience it mostly happens with things out of my control (job interviews and the like). I can't really empirically say if I've tried harder in a job interview because I told my mum about it or not. :-)

Another drawback of this system is that people really close to you care about what you're doing, so can get too intrusive and keep asking you questions about it. You end up resenting the questions because things aren't going well and you haven't actually started the task, which makes you resent the questioner, even though they mean well by it. It can drive a wedge between friends and obviously depends a lot by personality (one of my friends was like this and after a period of estrangement he learned to back off and I learned to not associate the resentment with him).

Having said that this auto-blackmail does work in specific situations for me, with specific people, but I think with more 'life' stuff than 'work' stuff.

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#27
pg has written about a similar idea about founders who get featured in magazines have a higher bar to live up and are less likely to just give up.

I have been doing this a lot recently--telling every friend I meet that I am broke and I am going to fix this part of my life in a big way. But i'm not sure if this is a cause or the effect because I am not doing this systematically or as a plan. I actually would be kinda embarrassed if I was doing it consciously. It is just what comes out of my mouth naturally these days. The impact of this is after a while you attain a certain image in your friend circle. That image gets reinforced from multiple channels. Example: a friend of mine posted one of those quizzes on my fb wall:

  "Is Zaid addicted to Facebook?"
  I answered ''no. But he is addicted to his laptop.
  Constantly refreshes his bank statement. Asks where the f*** is his 10,000. ''

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#28
Actually, the best thing that works for me is to work with somebody. For example, two of us are working on our startup: I'm the coder, my partner is the business guy. When we discuss how each one of us is doing and check if we match our goals, then I get enthusiastic for the next 24h. Of course, this is an oversimplified example but hopefully you got the idea. :)

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#29
Years ago there was a diet based on this idea, I think it was called the blackmail diet. You set your weight loss goals, and then escrow, say, $10,000 to be paid to the Klan or the Na$is or some other loathesome group if you don't reach your goals.

People are still fat, at least in the U.S.

Re: Tell HN: Auto-Blackmail

#30

Years ago there was a diet based on this idea, I think it was called the blackmail diet. You set your weight loss goals, and then escrow, say, $10,000 to be paid to the Klan or the Na$is or some other loathesome group if you don't reach your goals. People are still fat, at least in the U.S.

That's a fun one, I wonder if people are still fat, why isn't the klan the best funded institution on the planet :) ?

Either someone at the escrow company is now living the high life or the enrollment wasn't very high. But that's a really funny application of the idea.

I've looked it up, I'm late to the party:

  The Blackmail Diet by John Bear (1984, Ten Speed Press)
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