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Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

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Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#191

Post by zaphod4prez »

DrBoring wrote: post #74
getoj wrote: post #25

From Bill Watterson's commencement speech at Kenyon College in 1990. I was lucky to read this when I was graduating and it changed my whole career path. I am now very happy and very boring: "Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an ecce…

This quote reminds me of a book I just finished: "The Pathless Path" by Paul Millerd https://think-boundless.com/the-pathless-path/ It's about rejecting the default career path which our society considers normal and desirable. The default path is the one where you go to school, enter a career, work the career until you retire ... etc. I have been a lot of trouble lately figuring out why I'm so unhappy with my career.…

paul millerd is great!! im on his email list and really enjoy it, but havent gotten his book yet

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#192

Post by burntoutfire »

wolverine876 wrote: post #182
burntoutfire wrote: post #133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's an interesting take. You're probably right, if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed. Hardly anyone can be that special snowflake and create a successful startup, video game etc. And yet modern American culture is saying that you should go out and try doing it anyway. Guess what happens if you do...

> if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed How does encouraging people to find passions and live them communicate that they are beneath some median path? It tells them they are valuable, and that their passion is important.

It's not what I meant. Let me rephrase.

Most people will end up with an ordinary life (the "median path") - you simply can't have say a hundred million extraordinary people in a nation of 300m. Unfortunately, with the current programming which shows being average/ordinary as something lesser, a lot of them are going to end up seriously bummed out by where they end up in life.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#193

Post by raptor99 »

Fradow wrote: post #144

Here's my 30-something perspective. It's mostly settled for 10 years now with little change, as I'm very happy with it. I decided then what should be my guiding principle: build things, and don't become mainly a consumer of things. That's very vague on purpose: "build things" can refer to writing, photography, build gizmos with electronics, inventing cocktails, woodworking, games theorycrafting, repairing broken stuf…

I would say that I have followed just about this same path or very similar and if I had to rank my life and happiness on a scale I would give it at least a 7 or 8 out of 10 with 10/10 being unlimited money/choices, etc.

I feel that consumerism is a big and seductive trap that too many fall into, and it is quite easy to unknowingly fall way in.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#194

Post by zeruch »

I switched from 'exciting startups' to boring CRM for a decade, and TBH, it was very useful (and not actually boring). It was an opportunity to work in a smaller (150-700 person) company doing interesting stuff (mobile, cloud tooling, and then eventually post-sales technical services) but in an environment full of more grounded, less frenetically bouncing off the walls people...it gave you a pacing and maturity to actually learn more by not being so focused on externalities. The CV still looks good, the stuff I worked on still very relevant, but at a pace and with an atmosphere more conducive to accomplishing stuff I wanted.

....so now the 'trick' is to be blending both into something that stays interesting (to at least me), but also not requiring me to bend into unnatural shapes to maintain, with any new place I go. In my case that makes me very ideal for startups heading into their first stages of organizational maturity (they want to stop operating from the proverbial seat of pants and start scaling some kind of process).

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#195

Post by AussieWog93 »

wolverine876 wrote: post #182
burntoutfire wrote: post #133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's an interesting take. You're probably right, if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed. Hardly anyone can be that special snowflake and create a successful startup, video game etc. And yet modern American culture is saying that you should go out and try doing it anyway. Guess what happens if you do...

> if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed How does encouraging people to find passions and live them communicate that they are beneath some median path? It tells them they are valuable, and that their passion is important.

>It tells them they are valuable

Does it?

>and that their passion is important.

Yes, but this is the point. Whatever passion young students have is unlikely to propel them through life and satisfy them.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#196

Post by AussieWog93 »

wolverine876 wrote: post #181
AussieWog93 wrote: post #45

Are you me? I'm 28, and genuinely feel angry about the anti-corporate "the system is for losers, follow your passion" shit that was shoved down our throat as teenagers and young adults. It's not a recipe for anything except burnout and depression. Staking your ego on being the "guy who knows a lot about technology/concept x" is even worse. Stick with your job, and make sure to keep time for your wife (or husband) and…

> It's not a recipe for anything except burnout and depression. Staking your ego on being the "guy who knows a lot about technology/concept x" is even worse. > the anti-corporate "the system is for losers, follow your passion" shit that was shoved down our throat as teenagers and young adults. My experience is that I'm not doing something I love (to some degree), that's what leads to burnout and depression. I know fr…

>We need to each find what suits us. I'll just say that ironically, the parent is a bitter and burnt-out comment. Is the path of avoiding risk actually safe from that? IME, there is no easy path through.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I run two actual, profitable businesses and aren't advocating for complete risk avoidance.

I'm criticising specifically the "I kind of enjoy playing the guitar, therefore music is my passion, therefore I must study music and get a job as a musician and if I get a regular day job and start a family then I've failed" attitude that's shoved down young people's throats.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#197

Post by wolverine876 »

AussieWog93 wrote: post #195
wolverine876 wrote: post #182

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed How does encouraging people to find passions and live them communicate that they are beneath some median path? It tells them they are valuable, and that their passion is important.

>It tells them they are valuable Does it? >and that their passion is important. Yes, but this is the point. Whatever passion young students have is unlikely to propel them through life and satisfy them.

> Whatever passion young students have is unlikely to propel them through life and satisfy them.

What is that based on? I think it's quite the opposite: With some flexibility and creativity, you can make your life about something you're passionate about. I have little doubt about it.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#198

Post by wolverine876 »

burntoutfire wrote: post #192
wolverine876 wrote: post #182

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> if we make majority of people feel "beneath" the median path in life, most of them are bound to become depressed How does encouraging people to find passions and live them communicate that they are beneath some median path? It tells them they are valuable, and that their passion is important.

It's not what I meant. Let me rephrase. Most people will end up with an ordinary life (the "median path") - you simply can't have say a hundred million extraordinary people in a nation of 300m. Unfortunately, with the current programming which shows being average/ordinary as something lesser, a lot of them are going to end up seriously bummed out by where they end up in life.

I see what you mean, but I disagree with the conclusion: First, everyone grows up and discovers they won't be an astronaut or Messi or President; it's not such an emotional hardship. Much better to reach for your dreams and make the best you can of them than to never have tried. There's nothing wrong with a little failure, (and less wrong with a lot!).

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#199

Post by wolverine876 »

AussieWog93 wrote: post #196
wolverine876 wrote: post #181

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's not a recipe for anything except burnout and depression. Staking your ego on being the "guy who knows a lot about technology/concept x" is even worse. > the anti-corporate "the system is for losers, follow your passion" shit that was shoved down our throat as teenagers and young adults. My experience is that I'm not doing something I love (to some degree), that's what leads to burnout and depression. I know fr…

>We need to each find what suits us. I'll just say that ironically, the parent is a bitter and burnt-out comment. Is the path of avoiding risk actually safe from that? IME, there is no easy path through. Oh, don't get me wrong. I run two actual, profitable businesses and aren't advocating for complete risk avoidance. I'm criticising specifically the "I kind of enjoy playing the guitar, therefore music is my passion,…

> I'm criticising specifically the "I kind of enjoy playing the guitar, therefore music is my passion, therefore I must study music and get a job as a musician and if I get a regular day job and start a family then I've failed" attitude that's shoved down young people's throats.

Where do you see that message? People of that age that I know don't seem to think it. One person quit their engineering job and went to art school, but had no illusions. They found a steady, corporate day job using their art skills and setup their studio at home. Someone else has always loved playing bass and music, and quit their programming job to give it a try. Again, no illusions, but they are at least going to give it their all. I really admire that.

Re: Ask HN: Thoughts on being “boring”

#200

Post by softcactus »

vmception wrote: post #71
softcactus wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What life choices did you make to be able to have access to private equity markets but also go to month-long festivals? Also what festivals are a month long? I have a feeling we may be in different tax brackets haha.

> Also what festivals are a month long? I have a feeling we may be in different tax brackets haha. Usually not just a single thing, but if you go to some main ones its easy to get caught up in a string of things with other people that think its normal to keep going. Art Basel in Miami last December was 1 week long, and surrounded by multiple other festivals. The energy stays there for some time, and next thing you kn…

I haven't heard of half of these or been to Europe for that matter, but it's cool insight. What was your path as an entrepreneur to be able to afford to go to these events?
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