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The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

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Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#191

Post by benhurmarcel »

baxtr wrote: post #65

This is exactly what Netflix is betting on. ” Not Amazon Video, not YouTube, not even old-fashioned broadcasters. No, according to the company's chief executive, Reed Hastings, Netflix's biggest competitor is the pesky human need to close your eyes and sleep for a third of the day.” https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2017/apr/18/netflix-c...

I don't really get why Netflix would want to make customers watch more. I mean, you pay the same price whether you watch or not.

They logically should care about making people watch a minimum amount that ensures they keep paying, but beyond that it's worthless.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#192

Post by godot »

thesuitonym wrote: post #184
ses1984 wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My experience hasn't been the same, I have two kids age 4 and 6, and my experience has been more laid back. Most of the time I spend with this kids is fun. Sure, there can be bad times that are stressful and/or exhausting but it's mostly been very rewarding. My kids are asleep by 830 or 9pm, I'm not sure why this person feels they don't have free time until 11pm, that seems like an exaggeration to me. Even when they…

I have kids that same age, and our bedtime is 8:00. Usually they're asleep by 9 but there have definitely been days where they are up and fighting until well past 10. Certainly the gp was exaggerating, but just because my kids are in bed doesn't mean it's my time. 8-9 is lost policing actually being in bed almost every day. That said, I agree more with you, because as much as I like to say, "oh I could be doing x or…

Bed time used to be 8:30pm but a few weeks ago she just turned the age where she absolutely needed someone to be beside her until she falls asleep. All hell breaks loose if we don't, and I've thought about implementing cry-it-out but looking at her mode of crying I'm not sure that's healthy. Anyway, I'm staying with her for 2 hours until she falls asleep (she does take that long) because my spouse already cares for her all day and is exhausted, besides, she has a part time job she has to do some work in the evening for. 11pm is not an exaggeration and it's how it's been in the past 6+ weeks. I have hopes that things will be different at 3~4 years old, but not right now.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#193

Post by friendlybus »

nend wrote: post #128
_9omd wrote: post #92

Everyone is talking about shifting time around by doing things like getting up earlier, but that doesn't get around a fundamental problem of not enjoying the working part of your day. You still have the same amount of time, just shifted to a different end, and maybe you're a bit better off that way, but it's still the minority of the day. The real solution is to figure out how to love a larger percentage of your day.…

This same phenomenon is seen not just with work/leisure (with time being the limiting factor), but also with food/leisure (with money being the limiting factor). Studies show that people who are malnourished due to living in poverty, still spend money on leisure activities despite not having enough food to eat. Leisure time is important for people. Even if you enjoy your work, it's still work, and you're still going…

Leisure time is hard to define recently. People are escaping, true relaxing used to come from a hard day's work that passed on the gift of life to someone else and you could rest easy, then finally throw a joyous festival together.

Today's leisure time is closer to busy escapism than relaxation, for the poor at least.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#194

Post by kiliantics »

robotnikman wrote: post #53
kiliantics wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, for many, their job is a matter of survival. There is something really horrific in how a society as technologically advanced and productive as ours has almost eliminated leisure time, rather than increased it.

Its interesting, we have developed several time saving inventions over the past 50 years, only to have that time we saved filled up with more work. I was reading the book '168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think', and the author mentions how researchers in the past were predicting we would have so much free time in the future.

People have been wondering where the extra time is for a century, probably more:

https://harpers.org/archive/1932/10/in-praise-of-idleness/

I think Keynes talked about it a lot too.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#196

Post by nullsense »

tyre wrote: post #172
godot wrote: post #161

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The thing is for many other people it's not about enjoying work or not. I enjoy my job a lot, it's the best one I've had in the past decade. I also have a toddler. After I finish work promptly at 5 (sometimes before, and I work from home), it's a non-stop series of "work" bathing for the kid, either playing with the kid (while my spouse cooks) or I cook (and she plays with the kid, so either way it's busy work for bo…

When I read things like this, it makes me not want to have children. From friends, it doesn’t sound like your experience is much different. I’m sure you’re biased and it’s culturally unacceptable (to say the least) to say that you’d rather not have had kids, but I wonder how often you think about that loss of individuality? Maybe it’s that what you’d do were you to have the time wouldn’t be as “productive” in a broad…

To me felt like an 80% loss of my time and a much more restricted life.

Its a unique part of life that no other part of life will really offer you. Its a trade-off in that respect.

I don't think it's for everyone, and that's ok. At hard as it is it also has it's upside.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#197

Post by navbaker »

ses1984 wrote: post #173
tyre wrote: post #172

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I read things like this, it makes me not want to have children. From friends, it doesn’t sound like your experience is much different. I’m sure you’re biased and it’s culturally unacceptable (to say the least) to say that you’d rather not have had kids, but I wonder how often you think about that loss of individuality? Maybe it’s that what you’d do were you to have the time wouldn’t be as “productive” in a broad…

My experience hasn't been the same, I have two kids age 4 and 6, and my experience has been more laid back. Most of the time I spend with this kids is fun. Sure, there can be bad times that are stressful and/or exhausting but it's mostly been very rewarding. My kids are asleep by 830 or 9pm, I'm not sure why this person feels they don't have free time until 11pm, that seems like an exaggeration to me. Even when they…

My experience has been close to yours. The wife and I have a 3 and 5 year old. We did tons of research into different methods of sleep training methods and arrived at practical ways to make sure they understood that bedtime meant staying in their room and in their own beds, even if they weren't necessarily sleepy yet.

The 5 year old is in his "big boy bed" and we use a color-changing nightlight on a timer that is a soft red when he needs to stay in his room and turns blue when he can come out. The 3 year old is still in his crib for another few weeks, then we will transition him to the same setup.

Apart from the predictable times here and there where the older one sneaks out of bed to see what we're up to, it's worked out really well and gives us our sanity back from around 745pm to whenever we go to bed.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#198

Post by bartwe »

selestify wrote: post #176
ses1984 wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My experience hasn't been the same, I have two kids age 4 and 6, and my experience has been more laid back. Most of the time I spend with this kids is fun. Sure, there can be bad times that are stressful and/or exhausting but it's mostly been very rewarding. My kids are asleep by 830 or 9pm, I'm not sure why this person feels they don't have free time until 11pm, that seems like an exaggeration to me. Even when they…

Out of curiosity, what’s the minimum hours per day that you must spend on keeping the kid alive and well? (Minimum hours assuming you don’t get someone else to take care of the kid.)

Every moment they are awake and not explicitly in the care of another for the first few years.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#199

Post by nullsense »

ses1984 wrote: post #173
tyre wrote: post #172

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I read things like this, it makes me not want to have children. From friends, it doesn’t sound like your experience is much different. I’m sure you’re biased and it’s culturally unacceptable (to say the least) to say that you’d rather not have had kids, but I wonder how often you think about that loss of individuality? Maybe it’s that what you’d do were you to have the time wouldn’t be as “productive” in a broad…

My experience hasn't been the same, I have two kids age 4 and 6, and my experience has been more laid back. Most of the time I spend with this kids is fun. Sure, there can be bad times that are stressful and/or exhausting but it's mostly been very rewarding. My kids are asleep by 830 or 9pm, I'm not sure why this person feels they don't have free time until 11pm, that seems like an exaggeration to me. Even when they…

My free time starts at 10pm. But time is 12pm.

If I don't get a solid 2 hours a day I get very unhappy, very fast. So long as I get that, I'm good. But that's about all I can manage these days.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#200

Post by CalRobert »

godot wrote: post #161
_9omd wrote: post #92

Everyone is talking about shifting time around by doing things like getting up earlier, but that doesn't get around a fundamental problem of not enjoying the working part of your day. You still have the same amount of time, just shifted to a different end, and maybe you're a bit better off that way, but it's still the minority of the day. The real solution is to figure out how to love a larger percentage of your day.…

The thing is for many other people it's not about enjoying work or not. I enjoy my job a lot, it's the best one I've had in the past decade. I also have a toddler. After I finish work promptly at 5 (sometimes before, and I work from home), it's a non-stop series of "work" bathing for the kid, either playing with the kid (while my spouse cooks) or I cook (and she plays with the kid, so either way it's busy work for bo…

Reading this during my ~75 minutes of time I get to myself daily, and only by having basically no non-parenting conversation with my wife all day.
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