Steps Towards Happiness (2015) • Hacker News Board

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#161

Post by pdimitar » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 1:29 PM UTC

volkk wrote: post #160

pdimitar wrote: post #157

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You all somehow always make happiness about "just be happy, man". No offense to you or the other commenters, I simply can't take people like that seriously, hard as I try. If the advice is more nuanced and has more details, then I absolutely can respect it and engage with it in an interesting discussion. But when it's framed as "live in the moment" then I can only roll my eyes.

i don't think i wrote anywhere "just go be happy?" are you responding to the right person? i was just surmising based on extremely limited information that OP would be much less miserable if they weren't at their job, and then provided a scenario where if they try to time the market they might spend years more being miserable vs doing something sooner and dealing with the hopefully planned for consequences if the mar…

I'm indeed overreacting. My apologies.

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#162

Post by AlwaysRock » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 2:48 PM UTC

wing-_-nuts wrote: post #125

AlwaysRock wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mean this list seems obvious but its incredible how few people do it. Intermittent fasting is the only way I have been able to control my weight as an adult. Exercising makes you feel better and live longer. Alcohol is a poison that offers short term fun for long term sadness and pain. Sleep makes an immediately and daily impact on your life. Meditation (I don't do it anymore) is like cleaning for your brain and sh…

>Alcohol is a poison that offers short term fun for long term sadness and pain. Alcohol in excess ? Certainly, but I don't buy the idea that alcohol in moderation is harmful. There have, of course, been studies that draw negative conclusions about alcohol, but they either commingle societal effects or discount the cardiovascular benefits. TLDR: Alcohol in moderation is fine. Just don't drink to excess. Nearly all the…

I am a bit more bullish on this point that most and don't have articles prepared but booze causes cancer, even small amounts impact mood and sleep greatly, small amounts impact your ability to fight infections, and most "alcohol in moderation is okay" articles cite one singular study that is flawed.

You'll find about 1000 research articles stating alcohol is bad for you for every one saying in very specific circumstances it is okay for you in moderation.

At the end of the day its one of the leading causes of death in the world and for MOST people it does more bad for them than good. But its fun and the negative effects are not always immediate in the short term and its part of many cultures so its not going away anytime soon.

If you get curious doing really any amount of research about the negative impacts of booze, even small amounts, will show an overwhelming amount of evidence.

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#163

Post by AlwaysRock » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 2:52 PM UTC

sankumsek wrote: post #154

AlwaysRock wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mean this list seems obvious but its incredible how few people do it. Intermittent fasting is the only way I have been able to control my weight as an adult. Exercising makes you feel better and live longer. Alcohol is a poison that offers short term fun for long term sadness and pain. Sleep makes an immediately and daily impact on your life. Meditation (I don't do it anymore) is like cleaning for your brain and sh…

Could I ask why you don't do meditation anymore?

I have ADHD and even 7 minutes of guided meditation does wonders for my restless mind in the morning. But mostly I feel out of habit and have not gotten back into it. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 25 so spend most of my life with racing thoughts.

The clarity I got from meditation was nice but it also feels like it impairs the way I am used to my brain working so the trade off was not really welcomed.

I cut my caffeine consumption drastically (several expressos a day to 1 regular cup) which helped with racing thoughts and started taking melatonin before bed which helps prevent me staying awake trying to sleep for hours. Those two things also came from meditation but I'm able to get them elsewhere now without losing some of the creativity I find in my thought patterns during the day.

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#164

Post by AlwaysRock » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 2:56 PM UTC

mahogany wrote: post #152

wing-_-nuts wrote: post #147

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, the 'sick quitter' problem is pretty tricky, but even if you look at studies that only consider cancer rates, yes, the rates rise with consumption, but things really only explode exponentially past a certain point that is way higher than anyone should be drinking. Personally, I typically limit myself to a 6 pack a week. I think even a 12 pack a week wouldn't do much harm, and if we're talking about happiness, h…

> and if we're talking about happiness, having a beer with friends certainly does add to that. I am perfectly willing to accept a small increased risk for that. That I can definitely agree with. Over-optimizing your every action solely to lower your mortality chance by tiny fractions is no way to go through life.

Sure. I'm not saying everyone should stop drinking. I'm saying more people should actually do unbiased research into the impacts of drinking on their health because most people either under estimate the risk or the amount they actually drink.

That being said I do know a few people who actually only drink a beer or two a month with buddies. Good for them. I suppose that they could also drink an iced tea or diet coke and enjoy their friends company/be enjoyed my their friends just as much without the negative impact of the booze. I'm able to.

If someone is drinking more than a few beers than that isnt actually drinking in moderation. Many people who "drink occasionally" actually binge drink occasionally but since it is not that often they think no harm is being done.

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#165

Post by go_elmo » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 4:22 PM UTC

pdimitar wrote: post #158

lexapro wrote: post #141

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Many programmers can save >50% of their net income. I realize that this is not possible in every part of the world or in every situation, but if anyone is stable financially, it's probably us.

Most, yes. I wasn't able to. With any luck, I'll be able to start saving in a few months, after I hit 42.

Concluding from your previouw answer it is due to your choices, not possibilities. Financial education should be mandatory, to this day only academics seem to know the basic concept of wealth accumumation => need for investment to build personal wealth...

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#166

Post by pdimitar » Tue, Nov 16, 2021, 4:27 PM UTC

go_elmo wrote: post #165

pdimitar wrote: post #158

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Most, yes. I wasn't able to. With any luck, I'll be able to start saving in a few months, after I hit 42.

Concluding from your previouw answer it is due to your choices, not possibilities. Financial education should be mandatory, to this day only academics seem to know the basic concept of wealth accumumation => need for investment to build personal wealth...

> Financial education should be mandatory

I agree, but say that to my parents. You might as well say it at least 50% of all parents worldwide while you are at it. I personally am very mad at mine for practically not teaching me anything (not even cooking).

I am getting financial education after I hit 40. Pathetic to some but I couldn't have predicted the unknown unknowns. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#167

Post by TaXaZ » Wed, Nov 17, 2021, 1:27 PM UTC

alexvoda wrote: post #81

TaXaZ wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think it BCZ actually doesn't stem from happiness or even lack of it (say hello to functioning unhappy parents). Children give strong "purpose" and hijack the dopamine circuitry which is the real driver behind human drive, evolutionary speaking (yes they also hijack some other circuitry as well, but the real drive is the dopamine system). TLDR, you're right, it works on another dimension which is even more fundamen…

Just a note, the Triune brain theory, implied by you saying "lizard brain", is not actually part of scientific consensus. It was incredibly popular (even being cited by Carl Sagan) and still retains a lot of popularity among the public, but it seems it is no longer regarded as factual. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0963721420917687

First thanks for this read. But yes and no.

- Yes, bcz this reptile models is not accurate. It's at best an outdated but very intriguing analogy (which I agree can be misleading) but not here.

- No bcz a bit irrelevant to the our argument above. You may refer to [this paper](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK234157/) quoting:

> "The preponderance of the cerebral cortex (which, with its supporting structures, makes up approximately 80 percent of the brain's total volume) is actually a recent development in the course of evolution. The cortex contains the physical structures responsible for most of what we call ''brainwork": cognition, mental imagery, the highly sophisticated processing of visual information, and the ability to produce and understand language. But underneath this layer reside many other specialized structures that are essential for movement, consciousness, sexuality, the action of our five senses, and more—all equally valuable to human existence. Indeed, in strictly biological terms, these structures can claim priority over the cerebral cortex. In the growth of the individual embryo, as well as in evolutionary history, the brain develops roughly from the base of the skull up and outward. The human brain actually has its beginnings, in the four-week-old embryo, as a simple series of bulges at one end of the neural tube."

Despite what that paper says, the lizard analogy goes to this, and I agree it's loose, outdated and misleading one but doesn't change the argument we're discussing here.

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#168

Post by volkk » Wed, Nov 17, 2021, 4:36 PM UTC

pdimitar wrote: post #161

volkk wrote: post #160

Earlier quoted context omitted.

i don't think i wrote anywhere "just go be happy?" are you responding to the right person? i was just surmising based on extremely limited information that OP would be much less miserable if they weren't at their job, and then provided a scenario where if they try to time the market they might spend years more being miserable vs doing something sooner and dealing with the hopefully planned for consequences if the mar…

I'm indeed overreacting. My apologies.

no worries

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#169

Post by pdimitar » Thu, Nov 18, 2021, 10:52 AM UTC

wing-_-nuts wrote: post #142

UncleOxidant wrote: post #90

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but to me it seems that us the modern people are pressured much harder than previous generations. I don't think this is even close to true. In fact we've got it pretty soft compared to many earlier eras. Think about having to wake up prior to daybreak to feed the animals, milk the cows, start fires for cooking, heating (a lot of wood chopping), etc. Having to haul drinking water. Scratching out a subsistence living…

Happiness and satisfaction are relative to prior experience. I started out my adult life below the poverty line on disability, and small things like fresh fruit and veg or owning my home or car feel like lavish luxuries to me. Someone who was raised with a silver spoon would consider my spartan lifestyle miserly.

This is swinging a bit too hard in the other direction IMO.

I too grew up quite poor (although not on the level of those videos about Africa and various isolated Indian villages) and nowadays I am unhappy that I can't replace all Apple tech at home in one fell swoop.

That's an extreme example to illustrate a point: it's OK to change your values and want something more (as long it's not only hedonistic and just a blind greed and hunger for more and more, of course).

Re: Steps Towards Happiness (2015)

#170

Post by MauranKilom » Thu, Nov 18, 2021, 11:54 AM UTC

lgndisgnbdgg wrote: post #137

MauranKilom wrote: post #74

I personally subscribe to the advice given in The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck: You only get to choose your struggles in life. Happiness is the transient feeling in having dealt with a problem. You'll never run out of problems to deal with, therefore, the one thing to care about is what problems you end up engaging with (i.e. "give a f*ck about"). To that end, the ten items presented in the article are decent poin…

I have a question. How did you make it through more than 5 pages of that book? It reads like an 8th grader that is trying his hardest to let you know he's cool and smart enlightened as fuck bro and has to curse every other line. I was cringing so hard in the first pages there is no way I could read it. It reads as a sort of pop culture, edgy (and trendy) mindfulness / Buddhism comboniation in a self help package. The…

> How did you make it through more than 5 pages of that book? It reads like an 8th grader that is trying his hardest to let you know he's cool and smart enlightened as fuck bro and has to curse every other line.

Fact check: The author's first mention of himself is on page 10. The word "fuck" first appears on page 5.

Yes, the author uses informal language and sometimes relates personal experiences (but half the stories are of other people). I don't recall any allusions to his own coolness or enlightenedness - in fact, many of his own anecdotes relate to his own failures and lows. He's neither humble nor grandstanding in my eyes, just open and honest (which can be perceived as either, depending on context).

If you already knew all the points he was trying to make - good for you. I can see how someone telling you something you already know in the style of the book can be grating. To me, the book pointed out many things that I knew were true but that I needed spelled out by someone else.