151–160 of 241 posts
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(F)acebook, (A)mazon, (N)etflix, (G)oogle.
Microsoft and Apple each have over twenty times more employees than Netflix. I've never understood why Netflix is included, in FAANG, etc.
It has basically nothing to do with: revenues, profits, employees, products, technology.
This is a great article. For years I didn't know how to handle anxiety so I handled it "like a man" which lead to a pretty decent drinking habit. Now that I've stopped drinking and being open about what's going on with me, my anxiety looks like traditional anxiety which was easy for my gp to help diagnose. Taking the leap to be open and get help was the best thing to happen to me in years.
For this audience, I would add that anxiety is in some sense often a career positive. During the years I spent as a sysadmin, the continuous feeling that something was about to gowrong and I really needed to prepare for it was useful to my employers. Even if it was bad for me, my relationships, and my physical health.
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That just sounds like misandry. Society has an attitude problem with women in some respects too, but people just call it misogyny, not "toxic femininity" or whatever. Being consistent with terminology is sadly underrated.
Toxic femininity is actually a utilized term in the same spheres as toxic masculinity was coined (ie. Academia). Toxic masculinity is not against men but against a false societal pressure that men cannot show weakness, are justified in expressing their anger with violence, and that showing aggressive behavior instead of genuinely healthy human bonding is an acceptable and many substitute. It forces pressure on men to…
https://geekfeminism.wikia.org/wiki/Toxic_femininity
(That’s a horrible website but I know a lot of feminists use it as gospel).
I’ve never heard it used with your definition. A quick google search also shows nothing.
“Toxic masculinity” is a divisive term that needs to go away.
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In one case, someone is being a jerk because they can't control their reactions due to their anxiety disorder. These people are likely remorseful for what they have said or done. A true jerk is someone who is being a jerk on purpose because they don't care about others. And they don't regret their actions because they think they are justified. Seems like an important distinction to me.
The question then becomes: Does the "true jerk" have more control over his actions, or is he bound by his personality traits just as much as the "remorseful jerk"? Can we not say that the former can't control his reactions due to their "true jerk" disorder?
Both are ultimately responsible for their behaviour, one perhaps has a clearer path to redemption?
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That just sounds like misandry. Society has an attitude problem with women in some respects too, but people just call it misogyny, not "toxic femininity" or whatever. Being consistent with terminology is sadly underrated.
Toxic femininity is actually a utilized term in the same spheres as toxic masculinity was coined (ie. Academia). Toxic masculinity is not against men but against a false societal pressure that men cannot show weakness, are justified in expressing their anger with violence, and that showing aggressive behavior instead of genuinely healthy human bonding is an acceptable and many substitute. It forces pressure on men to…
Keep in mind that there are 3 types of people in this context:
1. People who know and understand the term as you described it.
2. People who "know" an "incorrect" (according to academia) definition of the term.
3. People who have never heard the term before, and draw their own definition based on where they saw/heard it and who it came from (often leads to #2).
The vast majority of people will fall into #2 and #3. I'd guess more than 99%.
I think that it's generally harmful and damaging for you to cite the original academic definition, because that just lends weight to the colloquial definition/understanding of the term as being valid.
The term has been hijacked. If you care about the original definition, you need some new words.
People aren't going to remember the difference between the "real" definition and the definition that most people use in common discourse. They'll just remember that "toxic masculinity is grounded in academia".
BTW as a side-note, I have never heard anyone say "toxic femininity" out loud, and I very rarely see it used online. People who recognize some form of "toxic masculinity" would either have no idea what you meant by "toxic femininity", or they would believe that it was associated with misogyny.
I’ve thought about this a bit. I don’t have anger issues but I have anxiety issues and I spent decades not understanding that I experienced anxiety. In my experience, the culture tells men to exhibit strength and show no weakness. What counts as strength/weakness has changed over time and varies depending on your social groups — it’s not just the stuff associated with typically masculine values, but it also shows up…
Yup. I had a serious anxiety condition since childhood. But my parents were so disgusted by my fear that they made me dissociate from it. I went to doctors and said something is wrong, they asked, what? And I could not answer because I could no longer feel my fear. I went for 30 years without knowing my problem. Society has a serious attitude problem towards men and it is seriously damaging a huge number of people.
On average, society has pretty serious attitudes/biases regarding both sexes. Men are seen as innately value-less, disposable, dangerous, free, and powerful, all at the same time. If you're a man, society does not care whether you live or die. Women are seen as having massive inherent value, in need of protection, harmless, unfree, weak, and limited, also all at the same time. If you're a woman, every decision about your life is seen as significant, sometimes to the degree that they don't trust you to make those decisions yourself.
All of these suck.
> When a man explodes in anger over something seemingly insignificant, he may appear like just a jerk. But he could be anxious. What's in a name... Its amazing the difference a title makes. Being "a jerk" is frowned upon, its "bad" and the jerk should know better. But when its "anxiety" its met with compassion and understanding. He needs help not a stern look. Why do we feel that the jerk has agency over his actions…
Typical Cluster B shifting of blame. It's not their fault. You made them do it. They just can't help themselves.
Anxiety is a perfect cover.
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Toxic femininity is actually a utilized term in the same spheres as toxic masculinity was coined (ie. Academia). Toxic masculinity is not against men but against a false societal pressure that men cannot show weakness, are justified in expressing their anger with violence, and that showing aggressive behavior instead of genuinely healthy human bonding is an acceptable and many substitute. It forces pressure on men to…
Your definition is not what the average person is going to think of when they see or hear the term "toxic masculinity". Keep in mind that there are 3 types of people in this context: 1. People who know and understand the term as you described it. 2. People who "know" an "incorrect" (according to academia) definition of the term. 3. People who have never heard the term before, and draw their own definition based on wh…
I admitedly think I'm pretty average and I've only seen toxic masculinity describing behavior that's clearly harmfully based on false notions of man's role in society such as what is listed above. Due to this, I've never gained the conclusion that toxic masculinity is a term to describe men as toxic.
Could you explain what the logic is that toxic masculinity is a descriptor that men are toxic, given the above?
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Toxic femininity is actually a utilized term in the same spheres as toxic masculinity was coined (ie. Academia). Toxic masculinity is not against men but against a false societal pressure that men cannot show weakness, are justified in expressing their anger with violence, and that showing aggressive behavior instead of genuinely healthy human bonding is an acceptable and many substitute. It forces pressure on men to…
> Toxic masculinity is not against men but against a false societal pressure that men cannot show weakness It seriously needs a name change, because the name implies that masculinity is toxic and that's how I've seen it interpreted.
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Your definition is not what the average person is going to think of when they see or hear the term "toxic masculinity". Keep in mind that there are 3 types of people in this context: 1. People who know and understand the term as you described it. 2. People who "know" an "incorrect" (according to academia) definition of the term. 3. People who have never heard the term before, and draw their own definition based on wh…
"Your definition is not what the average person is going to think of when they see or hear the term "toxic masculinity"." I admitedly think I'm pretty average and I've only seen toxic masculinity describing behavior that's clearly harmfully based on false notions of man's role in society such as what is listed above. Due to this, I've never gained the conclusion that toxic masculinity is a term to describe men as tox…