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I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

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Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#151

Post by LeftTurnSignal »

ilikehurdles wrote: post #102
scott_s wrote: post #44

Kids realizing they already have an online presence made by the people who were teaching them about being responsible about their online presence is becoming A Thing. Two other stories with similar circumstances: "When Kids Realize Their Whole Life Is Already Online" https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2019/02/when-... "My daughter asked me to stop writing about motherhood. Here’s why I can’t do that." htt…

That Washington post author is quite the narcisstic scumbag. I feel disgusted reading the writing of someone so extremely self-absorbed.

>> My daughter didn’t ask to have a writer for a mother, but that’s who I am. Amputating parts of my experience feels as abusive to our relationship as writing about her without any consideration for her feelings and privacy.

This part got me. To me that article definitely makes it sound like she's a writer first, and mother second. I just hope her child grows up to be a better person than that, or I hope I'm misunderstanding that article.

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#153

Post by aglavine »

majewsky wrote: post #81
aglavine wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This. She've never seen his mom's Facebook profile in 14 years? It seems fake.

How's she supposed to see it if she's not allowed to have a Facebook account?

She lives with her mother 14 years and never saw her at any time posting in Facebook. Her mother never show her pictures there from her childhood?

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#154

Post by jerf »

beering wrote: post #115
jerf wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's edited, of course. Since this is the 21st century and everyone's on a hair trigger for reasons to be offended, everyone in magazines like that is edited, so there's nothing particular about this author getting edited. Magazines have editors for a reason. Nobody produces the best prose on their own without any editing. The only thing in the article that really struck me as strained was the "We are also the next g…

> really struck me as strained was the "We are also the next generation of engineers and innovators," bit. People have been saying this to kids non-stop, so it's not a stretch to think that they would parrot it as well. I think both explanations are plausible.

I agree. It was just the one thing that kinda struck me as a bit off. My experiences with that age range and my experiences being that age range are such that that's not something really on our minds at that age. The only thing a conventionally-schooled 8th grader knows and can remember is being in school. (Not quite the same age range, but I told my 2nd grader that I use math a lot at work and I'm pretty sure that there was at least a period of time where he thought I basically go to work every day and do addition problems... I'm still not sure that's not necessarily the subconscious view he has.)

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#155

Post by dcole2929 »

It's pretty apparent the things that a kid would be embarrassed about are not the same thing I as an adult would be embarrassed about. I'm 20+ years removed from those events in my life where these kids aren't. To them this is recent memory and more importantly still stuff they will get made fun of for. How many people do you know who carried a nickname all throughout middle and high school from one dumb thing they did when they were 8? I know some who still have the dumb nickname 20-30 years after the fact.

This isn't child abuse by any means but it's just incredibly dumb on the parts of the adults around them. By writing/posting about kids you make them public figures and open them up to all the abuse anyone on the internet wants to heap on them. And this is all happening at a time when they are going through painfully awkward transitions and just starting to discover who they are and want to be.

There are absolutely going to be lawsuits about this sooner than you'd think.

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#156

Post by aembleton »

majewsky wrote: post #81
aglavine wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This. She've never seen his mom's Facebook profile in 14 years? It seems fake.

How's she supposed to see it if she's not allowed to have a Facebook account?

By getting hold of her phone, or watch her mum using Facebook.

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#158

Post by dcole2929 »

Jaruzel wrote: post #105
ianlevesque wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I had a good laugh first, then I felt sad for her It's an issue of consent. She's voluntarily sharing specific selected photos & videos with her social peers, a hacked baby monitor would be a violation. The glib dismissal here helps nobody.

> It's an issue of consent. Her baby hasn't given consent. Believe you me, there's loads of 'Invasion of Privacy' lawsuits from kids to their parents coming down the pipe over the next decade.

I just saw a clip from one of those scared straight shows last night and this was my first thought. These kids are going to hit 18 and sue the everlasting hell out of anyone who had anything to do with this. Leaving aside the questionable effectiveness of those programs to begin with, all I could think was how can a parent allow their kid to be put on tv and abused in such a vulnerable position no matter how bad they are.

I think it's the same for these kids who have been posted on social media by their parents. Kids get their lives ruined by this type of stuff. The internet has a long memory, and these children are in no way capable of consenting. Yeah it's not Cash Me Outside girl bad but you're still potentially putting still maturing children on display to be potentially mocked by random internet mobs. Forever.

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#159

Post by dwild »

As much as I want to believe it's a good thing for a kid to be away from social media, there doesn't seems to be any compelling argument for it in that article.

It seems like fear is her only justification, which to me if anything, is the worse reason to do anything. Being aware of the risk and mitigating it when necessary is the right way to do it, instead of simply letting fear control us. The strange thing is that she seems to be aware of that risk and did use methods to mitigate it.

Her lack of social media doesn't seems to affect her though, so I guess it's alright in her case. I know personally though that my group of friend and I had ton of trouble to include people without social media in any event organization, and the increased friction slowly pushed many of the ones without it away (while the solution, which did work for some, was simply a fully anonymous account, though I think Facebook now ban theses accounts).

Re: I’m 14, and I quit social media after discovering what was posted about me

#160

Post by DoreenMichele »

aglavine wrote: post #65
DoreenMichele wrote: post #39

I cannot imagine posting so much about a child of mine without them being aware of it at all. I talk a lot about my sons. They know. If I feel it is a story with sensitive information, I run it past them to see if they are okay with me saying that. I can't really comprehend the thinking here of the family members who did this. They talk about her but not to her? That's the opposite of "social" behavior. That's treati…

This. She've never seen his mom's Facebook profile in 14 years? It seems fake.

Just for the record, I was not questioning the veracity of the story.

Lots of weird things happen in the privacy of home. Children are especially vulnerable to having a fast one pulled on them.

So I don't see any reason to question the story at this time, though I'm also not up for trying to actually verify the veracity so as to win some internet argument.

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