> Pushed away by virtual imitations and decaff substitutes that, though nowhere near as gratifying as taking a real trip to pound town
Sex ain't going out of fashion, you're just garbage at it.
Sex is going out of fashion?
141–150 of 692 posts
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#142Market homogenization (because of the apps) leads to a larger scale of 'winner takes all' dynamics, ie increasing inequality. The top players in the market are probably getting way more offers than they can, um, service, and for anyone in the lower ranks, the effort/reward is uneconomic.
This does happen, but mostly for men. The most successful men are seeing a different girl 5 nights a week. Typically women will tend to try a few men out, then stick with a favorite or two.
Men at the bottom get absolutely nothing, while women at the bottom mostly end up going on bad dates or getting used for sex.
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#143Earlier quoted context omitted.
How does an average woman find the process?
I don't know. I will speculate that they will go on dates with attractive men but because the top tier of men by appearance attract so many women there is little incentive to stay in a long term relationship for the man. If this is true then there is a very narrow middle ground between the extremes which could explain why fewer meaningful relationships are formed via online dating relative to a cold approach.
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Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#144Earlier quoted context omitted.
I do wonder if the act of dating has gotten substantially less fun than it was in the past. At least if you go to a bar/concert/activity you may have fun and make plutonic friends, messaging random people on a dating site seems much more depressing.
It is very un fun, one of the big things I've noticed is online dating is very different experience for men and women. Both have their negatives and positives, but it create a weird dynamic of how people date.
I think it is more than fair to just say men have it worse in regards to online dating.
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#145Articles like this are often mostly focused on the male side of cisgendered male-female relationships. Have things not changed for women? Or how about among other types of people? Is gay sex going out of fashion too?
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Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#146There might be some confusion between fashion and reality. You can never be to rich or too thin, but obese and broke is an extremely common combination. Sex may be waning under the stress of modern living, but that doesn't necessarily make it unfashionable.
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#14795% of Tinder swipes by women are passes compared to 47% for men. Women tend to date up. Online dating apps are rigged for men. These apps are search engines optimized to match women with the top 5% of men. These apps are designed for women. Being average or even above average will almost never result in a date. Tinder was designed like a slot machine which will ruin your self-esteem from constant rejection but your…
What’s the source of this?
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#148Earlier quoted context omitted.
I think that all the things you listed are definitely culprits, but I wouldn't be so quick to discount porn. Anecdotally, I myself and many otherwise healthy, sociable young men I know have pretty serious porn addictions. I really wish there would be more research done on the negative impacts of pornography, especially on young men and teens/pre-teens. I know typically any anti-porn sentiment is met with "Oh you're j…
Yeah, but porn addiction is a consequence I think. If all men could get laid whenever they'd feel like it with a willing partner, then porn use would plummet. I haven't met many women into porn, probably because a one night stand is just a zero effort tinder swipe away, from the comfort of your pijamas in your living room. As a man, you end up turning to porn or paying for sex, or drinking or doing drugs, to compensa…
I don't believe that's it. Plenty of men in relationships with a "willing partner" use heaps of porn, and in many circumstances prefer using porn to sex.
And yes, having _sex_ is only a swipe away for women. But having decent sex that you enjoy and is another matter altogether. And that's before thinking about safety.
If I was looking for reasons why fewer women seem to be into porn, I'd say it's because the vast majority of porn is explicitly made to cater to male desires.
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#149a related long read: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/23121356-your-brain-o... I thought it was a decent book, seemed to cite a good number of sources, but I'm no scientician. But Gary makes a pretty rational argument -- If you're finding yourself in a certain situation[1], without a known underlying medical cause (as ruled out by a doctor), then cutting out porn never killed anyone, and anecdotally has cured m…
Gary Wilson was a scientific fraud: https://medium.com/@nicole.prause/gary-wilson-was-a-known-sc...
Thank you for this, I was unaware. I will definitely be digging some more :)
Re: Sex is going out of fashion?
#150The comments in this thread and this article is making me want to read HN less. (What a crazy incorrect take for most of the population.)
There are some topics that are excellent on HN, from which I learn an immense amount almost daily. This is not one of them.