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Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

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Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#121

Post by prirun »

100011_100001 wrote: post #33
ziddoap wrote: post #21

“If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.” I know saying this is easier than doing it, but; seek upward movement until you no longer feel like you're the smartest person in the room. I would also add, although it's purely personal opinion, that seeking a solution to loneliness through work is a surefire way to feel more lonely. You say you're big on self-improvement, but are you only focus…

I've thought about this. I actually do not think I'm the smartest person in the room, hell two of the people in my direct team are definitely smarter than me. I think I have really good systems that allow me to consistently solve problems and write code. On the loneliness front, I meant in the scope of working. I have four kids, I am everything BUT lonely with them. However, I do agree that aside from work and one of…

Being the big fish at your current job gives you some advantages. I would talk with your manager and explain that you need to work fewer hours so you can take better care of your physical health. Especially if you combine this with coaching your peers, they may not resent the fact that you are getting some perks they don't get. And if they do, well, that's not your problem. I have worked at many jobs where I received flexibility that others didn't have, and as long as you're not a dick about it, others will accept it because of your obvious value. The alternative is, you quit and then they get all the work.

Work isn't everything. If you start working on your health, it will improve your mood and outlook. My guess is, you have an introverted personality and occasional feelings of isolation are just part of it. Try to accept it rather than fix it, because you might find that if you did have peers, that would have its challenges too.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#123

Post by clolege »

I agree with the sentiment here around leaning into mentoring/teaching. Watching videos of myself teaching others and iterating on it has been one of the best things to happen to my communication (and thus teamwork) skills.

Hearing you say things like:

> Nowadays people just accept whatever I say as the best way.

> I catch myself becoming more controlling because at this point about 80% of the code base is my code for the applications my team is responsible for.

> The thought of "great, one more thing I got to fix" is coming up too frequently.

makes me wonder if you might benefit from reading organizational books like Turn the Ship Around? You seem to be getting to the point where cultivating leadership throughout your organization might be the best way for you to affect change, and with the right mental models you can often do that with slight nudges or answering questions differently.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#125

Post by iandanforth »

As an alternative to looking for a new company (which is not a bad idea) I can suggest a path taken by a peer of mine in a similar boat. They and another go-to engineer petitioned to start a 'new projects' division and basically work on an internal spinoff. Two people with the backing of the company, a decent amount of freedom, and a mandate to build something that customers will love and buy. They had an exec sponsor and good relations with much of the e-staff. They got to experience all the "fun" of a startup with more of a safety net.

This way you pick those people who you think can help you grow and put a clear and hard challenge in front of yourself.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#126

Post by beardedetim »

100011_100001 wrote: post #95
tsss wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Or he just bangs out a ton of crappy code in the name of "pragmatism", while everyone else has to clean up after him and thus takes longer. I've seen this many times.

Eh, that is exactly what I don't want. Pretending I am this amazingly productive developer and my code is just trash. I just checked. In 2021, only two defects were created against my specific code changes. If I had to home into a weakness of mine is that sometimes I solve today's problem well, but don't think extensively about how tomorrow's problem in that space might look like. The struggle is between creating sim…

> The struggle is between creating simple solutions vs over-engineering for future proofing. I'm pretty sure I'm biased towards simple solutions.

I want to encourage you to keep learning about your own biases here but to continue to have that bias as much as possible.

I like the term "throw away code" here but I think another way to say it would be that most of the code I write is like a jig for woodworking. I don't need it at the end of the day, it looks like shit, and holds up the real Things while I figure out how those things actually work.

Sometimes in code though, I find, that the jig _is good enough for now_ and it's super easy to replace the three that break instead of all 20 I needed to build it.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#127

Post by 100011_100001 »

phphphphp wrote: post #89
MauranKilom wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> People didn’t challenge them because it was exhausting, because they knew best, despite their constant churning out of garbage code that the business didn’t have the guts to address. That doesn't square with how people are going out of their way to query OP though, no? If people drag you into meetings tangential to your work, it seems unlikely that they hate working with you...

Difficult to say without knowing the OP personally, but in my experience, all of this can square. There’s complex dynamics at play that are a product of the genius developer mythology: someone produces a lot of code, the system becomes an extension of that person, everyone becomes dependent upon that person regardless of whether the person is good or bad, enjoyable to work with or not, because they’re the genius syst…

This is a fair criticism and concern.

Part of the reason why I made this post is I can sense internally that I'm starting to lean on the whole "I know this thing better than you", which actually scares me. If I'm thinking it, I'm probably sub-communicating it.

Both this reply and your original one are solid thoughts.

> someone produces a lot of code, the system becomes an extension of that person, everyone becomes dependent upon that person regardless of whether the person is good or bad, enjoyable to work with or not, because they’re the genius system-whisperer.

I hope this is not true for myself, but your logic is sound. I see the truth in it, I just hope it's not the truth. You gave me something to reflect on.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#128

Post by birkey »

Thanks for the post. I can related to what you posted and would like to offer few perspectives that might help you.

1. Start with accepting the fact that you are the lead developer who is responsible for the long term success of the project thus the team. This is really important in that it puts the project and team as the same level.

2. Start mentoring and delegating more core pieces to others in the team. Allow them to make mistakes of their own so they can see the bad and appreciate the good. As long as their work is good enough, let them take more ownership so they can grow be the lead developer if you are ever to move on.

3. The last point is to always remind yourself of the fact that the project will eventually continue regardless of you being there or not. As a lead, it is your responsibility that it will continue smoothly after you move on to other things. As long as you keep doing "one more thing you got to fix", you will accumulate more responsibilities that will eventually burn you out. So for the good of the project, the team and yourself, you should start working towards a scenario where either the project or the team does not need to depend on you to be able to move forward, which will eventually happen whether you like it or not.

Re: Tell HN: The loneliness of a pretty good developer

#130

Post by phkahler »

100011_100001 wrote: post #40
ctvo wrote: post #16

I think you're an above average developer working at a below average company. This could be the root of all your problems. Nothing is more frustrating than working with peers you know aren't carrying their weight. Do you want to be an engineering leader? This is what you are, regardless of your official title at your company. Engineering leaders are judged by how much better they make everyone else. You may hear the…

The pivot I have been debating is to become a Lead Development Manager with the express purpose of enabling everyone else, removing obstacles, creating better processes etc. My problem is that I love code much more than talking to people all day. I have been mentoring Jr Devs for a while now in an official capacity which helps. I like the idea of "make systemic changes to help your peers become more effective". So th…

Get involved in the hiring process. You should be able to screen candidates well and if the company really is full of sub-par developers (doubt it but maybe) you will bring that up a bit. If you need tips on interviewing shoot me an email (same ID at g mail) it's easy for a good engineer once you know what to look for and how.

BTW that's not isolation you're feeling. It's responsibility, respect, and frustration. You didn't ask for the first two, you earned them.

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