131–140 of 174 posts
I'm not joking. I keep wondering if I should introduce my grandma to such a game, but I live far away and they all seem too complicated. Would be happy about suggestions.
> His epiphany came when his current partner told him how she had lost her grandmother. Unlike Koremura’s loss, her grandmother had died alone—a kodokushi. It was seeing the deep regret in her, and accepting his own ennui, that made Koremura finally take action. He left his job as a stockbroker and set up his own removal company dedicated to the cleanup of kodokushi victims. He wanted to give something back to the ge…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shikata_ga_nai
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We know that telling people to just get over it doesn't work. That's why we provide short courses of carefully planned therapy. These two sentences seem to contradict each other - the short courses of planned therapy are basically a therapist saying "get over it" and providing opportunities to ease into getting over it. And in this particular case, I can state confidently that telling people to just get over it does…
I'd refrain from the pickup artist / redpill subs, as the toxicity is genuinely pervasive, but the "just get out there and talk to people " advice is spot-on. One thing that the FA crowd doesn't seem to realize is that you don't have to be attractive or even average to get into a relationship or friendship. Ugly people get laid all the time and have plenty of friends. The important thing is getting out there. And yes…
Unfortunately the only people teaching those skills are redpill, pua, and similar sorts. I think this is mainly because many of the effective techniques contradict a lot of socially desirable dogma.
That's a big problem with technological progress. It fulfills more and more of our needs, making it harder and harder to fulfill our need to be needed . Sure, you can give everyone basic income and robot caretakers, but people who aren't needed by other people will still suffer. I would much prefer it if society somehow changed itself to want and need all of its members, not just the young productive desirable ones.…
That sounds insanely dystopian to me, for the fact that any member of that society is viscerally dependent on others -- anyone who claims to value freedom needs to think again. Being needed is crucially instrumental toward controlling one's own experience in the current environment. But why would it ever be a terminal value?
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I do wonder what it is about the psychology of the 40 year old which makes it harder to form new friendships than say a 20 year old.
i'd say dwingling neuroplasticity and brain chemistry.
If only there was something like World Of Warcraft that is suitable for the elderly. I'm not joking. I keep wondering if I should introduce my grandma to such a game, but I live far away and they all seem too complicated. Would be happy about suggestions.
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I think this is very cultural. It's about honouring them in their death. Though I understand, that does sound off to my western mind.
I think the problem is present in all the countries where traditional marriage system has been broken. The only difference between USA and Japan will be that you can find old-homes very easily in USA. Japan being a very conservative country that prides itself over 'protecting' all the bad symptoms of its culture will not solve this problem because, ironically, they think that this is what makes them 'Japanese'.
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"Japan is incredibly stubborn and ignorant when it comes to addressing core social and psychological problems in their society." Not just Japan http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-33... Politicians in the UK talk about community this and community that but in practice we are losing the ties between neighbours/families.
Well, what do you expect? Multiculturalism and a strong sense of community don't really go together very well.
A sense of community is far more developed by the shared experiences together, rather than just the similarity of past culture. I always had a very strong sense of community with the people I did my initial training with, and the people I worked with every day. Much less so with the people from a similar culture.
I'm currently living in Carlisle, in the North of England. Very mono-cultural, very white, working class, etc. There's really not a lot of sense of community at all. After the flooding a few years (shared experiences) there was. But here now? No. Most people just sit at home in the evenings watching TV, and never do things together (much shared past / culture, they often watch the same shows, but no shared experiences, so little sense of community).
My wife and I work quite hard to deliberately develop community, inviting people over for meals, (board-)games evenings, barbecues, etc.
But the thing is now, you have to be deliberate about creating community. It's no longer automatic.
Personally, I blame TV hugely. It's far too easy these days to spend all ones free / down time disconnected from the people around you. The internet just continues the trend.
In our organisation, on board our ship(s) ( http://www.logoshope.org/ ) which doesn't have TV, when people started having their own laptops that were able to watch TV series and movies on, we saw a huge shift in community, from people in free time hanging out together and talking, playing games, exploring, etc, to people sitting on their own in their cabins playing computer games, watching TV / movies, etc. And the sense of community suffered.
This is scary. This is the first time I read such article. I live alone, never married ( no plans to marry either ), have no friends. I have a decent job though. This article scares me.
that sucks that the article scares you, stay strong my friend. my room in japan actually has started to look like the picture i saw in the article. back in the states, i was a much cleaner person but now i find it almost impossible and stuff is just lying around everywhere... the similarity is a little scary there but i just laughed it off like i usually do. im hoping ill be fine :)
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To some that question is the same as "Why don't you plan on being a billionaire?"
The more interesting question is: how has one traversed their entire life up to gainful employment and has no friends? This seems to be the more telling question.
I have plenty of relatives along with close friends (enough that getting together to play Arkham Horror is becoming a logistic nightmare), but I could easily, with just a few unlucky breaks or moves, not have any close friends. It isn't even that uncommon.