If I had to pick the best line in that blog, it'll be this:
"You become an average of the people you spend the most time with."
The days are long but the decades are short
231–240 of 406 posts
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#232> On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do for your work I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will b…
"I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will be right."
Privileged? Hardly. I worked a regular job for many years while spending years of my free time and weekends to create a business where I can now choose what I work on.
Most people aren't willing to sacrifice time now to enjoy comforts later. I don't consider it privilege that I did..and neither should the many people working on startups.
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#233Earlier quoted context omitted.
Father of two here. It's true that having a child forces any responsible adult into revisiting their priorities, and some things that seemed important before parenthood suddenly aren't . I don't think it eliminates a desire to be successful: I think that it changes the parameters by which you determine success. And having a child throw up/mess on your nice clothes and shower the inside of your nice car with food and…
> It is worth it, and anybody without kids who says otherwise knows not of which they speak. That's some gross generalization. Any childless bachelor could know what the "path" is like by staying over with a friend that has a child and helping out for some time. On the other hand, parents that walk the path and later find out they're not cut out for it, have to suffer quietly, and can't voice their true opinions, bec…
> Any childless bachelor could know what the "path" is like by staying over with a friend that has a child and helping out for some time.
This is a important point which i struggled as well. As a teenager, i had my lived closely with two of my cousins ( from when they were newborn to primary school). Then as an adult with a another cousins children. But, when my daughter was born, i was totally surprised at the transformation i had undergone. I believe nothing can prepare you for having a child. I discussed this my wife and cousins as well and they too agree. There is something special about the parental feelings which needs you to be a parent.
> because no one can dare fathom someone might not like kids
Everyone can agree that raising children is not a bed of roses. There are lots of struggles, sacrifices and challenges. And more importantly its a long term commitment. Some people willingly make sacrifices and do micro management or spend a lot of time on parenting. Some are easy on parenting part and some offload the whole thing to nanny or grandparents. All of them like the good parts of being a parent but would like to trim down on the less favourable aspects. So its not about "not liking the kids" but finding a right balance in parenting in what you could do.
Having said that, I believe that having a child should not be an impulsive act but rather a conscious decision by both partners. If your partner or the circumstances are unfavourable then better not let another individual also struggle through it. But, still the whole feeling is so wonderful that its better to work towards a direction to setup the things for being a parent and enjoy through it.
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#234"Summers are the best." Agreed! Although I think fall in the midwest is my favorite combination of season and location. Too bad it always goes by so quickly.
It's funny coming from someone who lives in SV. I just moved here and have a hard time differentiating Summer from the rest of the SF seasons. It's all the best!
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#235> "having enough money so that you don’t stress about paying rent does more to change your wellbeing than having enough money to buy your own jet" remember the old adage future billionaires of HNs: "if it flys, floats or flirts, it's cheaper to rent it". Rarely does it make sense to buy a jet until you're utilizing over 100 hrs annually. Charter->JetCard->Fractional->Ownership
>> ...or flirts... That is so not politically correct. It's funny.
Does that make it untrue?
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#236Earlier quoted context omitted.
Calling an Industrial Age invention a primate dominance ritual is insane.
I don't think that's the parents meaning. There always have been and will be dominance rituals. Some would have been physical fights, but in modern office culture punching subordinates is seen as unacceptable - but some people still need some dominance rituals - and picking a fight over "do as I tell you and turn up on time, thus demonstrating I am the dominant one" is pretty tame stuff compared to a silver back ripp…
Making the argument that those two behaviors, management insisting on punctuality and violent bodily mutilation, are commensurable is the exact kind of insane thinking that I am criticizing.
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#237Brings to mind the "Notebooks of Lazarus Long" portions of Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love". Viewed from 52 years old you make me wish my thoughts had been as coherent when I was 30. Good stuff.
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#238> On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do for your work I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will b…
"I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will be right." Privileged? Hardly. I worked a regular job for many years while spending years of my free time and weekends to create a business where I can now choose what I…
There's a privilege here you are not seeing: ability. Just being capable of pursuing a startup puts you in an elite minority. Hard work and sacrifice are familiar to many people in the 8/10.
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#239> On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do for your work I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will b…
"I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will be right." Privileged? Hardly. I worked a regular job for many years while spending years of my free time and weekends to create a business where I can now choose what I…
>I worked a regular job for many years while spending years of my free time and weekends to create a business where I can now choose what I work on.
Then you did not have a regular job. You had a job that paid you enough to support yourself while retaining enough free time and mental energy to pursue your startup idea. For most people, this is not the case (esp. the mental energy bit).
Re: The days are long but the decades are short
#240> On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do for your work I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will b…
"I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never feel they have this luxury, and 8/10 will be right." Privileged? Hardly. I worked a regular job for many years while spending years of my free time and weekends to create a business where I can now choose what I…
There's more to it than that: you probably had resources that afforded you that time, or support that valued and encouraged that kind of behavior. Maybe you had a good education or reliable parents. And you probably had fairly good health throughout all of that.
There are so many things that make your actions highly specific to your situation, and that's a privilege that you have.