91–94 of 94 posts
Earlier quoted context omitted.
You don't really need a site for that - just walk into a pub.
That was my notion. ;) When I moved to SF ~10y ago, you could get tea or coffee with strangers by walking into a cafe, but it's become taboo to talk to strangers in public when sober.
I went to tea with a group in NY maybe a year ago, had a fantastic time. Great work Ankit and co!
(Also next time I'm in New York, come to one of my tea times. Would be cool to exchange high fives. Maybe a hug if I'm real lucky.)
Meeting people is nice, but only if they are quality people. Otherwise, I'd rather not. There aren't many of these in the town I live in, but I know they are here, at least some of them. How to meet these people? "Quality" might sound snobby or something so let me qualify... people who are intelligent, people who are motivated, people who have a sense of humor, people who aren't dishonest with intent to take unfair a…
I'm so sorry this is something you thought you had to outline.
I do think it's worth noting that everyone has a lot of quality when you actually believe them into it (also known as Pygmalion Effect [see http://psych.wisc.edu/braun/281/Intelligence/LabellingEffect..., http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pygmalion_effect])
One of the reasons we keep a curated community of hosts is because we think a lot of our belief in others is a function of situational notions of normalcy. Good hosts create a sense of norm by being the first to take that leap of faith on the people around them. What does taking that leap of faith look like? Welcoming strangers with double high fives, looking them in the eye when they talk, asking questions with a genuine interest in what the others have to say, and trusting them enough to share oneself with them, for starters.
These norms set the environment on fire. It's what makes the air at anything Tea With Strangers different from the air in most gatherings of strangers. Breathe it in for a little bit and everyone begins to find interest in each other because layers that make people 'strangers' begin to get peeled very quickly. That is, unless you're holding your breath.
Quality people believe in the quality of people in mind and in action. And that's one of the reasons we think TWS works. Because it attracts people who don't hold their breath. Upward spiral!
High fives, Ankit
P.S. Quality might sound snobby, so let me qualify:
Everyone is smarter about something than you are.
Everyone has been motivated to do something you haven't.
Everyone laughs at something. It's one of the two more fundamental human emotions (i.e. babies either laugh or cry when they express emotion. This isn't lost as we grow.).
Everyone has an interest in themselves because we want to be taken care of (see: Maslow's Hierarchy), but sometimes people have circumstances that make them distrustful of others. You have an opportunity to empathize and understand that there's a reason for that that are beyond your understanding unless you take interest in others without wanting to take unfair advantage of them yourself.
Everyone's mind is as open as their life's circumstances have conditioned them to be. If and when you interact with someone – even if by sharing physical space – you are a part of their life's circumstances.
Everyone is interesting.
Meeting people is nice, but only if they are quality people. Otherwise, I'd rather not. There aren't many of these in the town I live in, but I know they are here, at least some of them. How to meet these people? "Quality" might sound snobby or something so let me qualify... people who are intelligent, people who are motivated, people who have a sense of humor, people who aren't dishonest with intent to take unfair a…