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What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

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Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#61

Post by mbesto »

stegosaurus wrote: post #9

I attended an elite UK university having had a poor upbringing. This article reads painfully to me. I don't have the words to describe why, but I can try. The closest I can come is to say that this idea of inclusiveness is terminally broken. It's a sort of bandage over a huge chasm of differences. For a poor person to become wealthy requires them to discard their baggage. Change the accent, the clothes, the pop cultu…

> The closest I can come is to say that this idea of inclusiveness is terminally broken.

The term "inclusiveness" is utter bullshit. (no criticism towards you OP) The idea of "trying to include everyone with diverse backgrounds" was created by top leaders who wanted to prop themselves up even more by characterizing themselves as benevolent stewards. Hint - they're usually not. Let's face reality - we're naturally biased and we still don't have any definitive, scalable way to select (include) other human beings without our short-minded biases blinding us.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#62

Post by beamatronic »

spiritplumber wrote: post #30
dsp1234 wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I too also grew up poor, but find myself in a position where I have a very nice job, and I also have a hard time articulating to other's how warped I feel about money/status/etc. The best I've ever found is John Cheese's Cracked articles on the topic which I felt were almost like he was writing from inside of my head. http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-stupidest-habits-you-devel... http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-st…

"The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boot…

When I was in my 20's, and I first started making "good money", I splurged on some $170 dress shoes. Those shoes lasted a good 15 years and they were the best shoes I ever owned.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#63

Post by jacquesm »

jheriko wrote: post #53
AnimalMuppet wrote: post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> A very rich man once said to me that if you act like a rich person eventually you would find yourself to be rich... I think there is an element of truth in that. Unfortunately, there is also truth in the idea that if you act like you're rich, you end up poor, because you wind up spending all you have (probably plus some).

true. its one to take carefully with consideration.... have you met many rich people who spend like there is no tomorrow? its about acting like a /rich person/ not as if you have a limitless supply of money and are actually rich. :)

Not the person you asked but: I have met people that became wealthy and acted like you describe and they usually ended up broke some years or decades later. I've also met some extremely wealthy people and they in fact were visually very modest (but worth more money than one could spend in a lifetime).

The contrast runs something like this: German dude, worth $10M made his money in real estate, started an online company, lost it all but bought Porsches and hired fancy places, in the end turned to crime in order to continue to finance his life-style.

American dude, worth > $50M (at one point...), spent money like it was toilet paper, golden taps in the bathroom, fancy Rolls-Royces (multiple...), used to be the #1 in a hotly contested tech field, lost it all when the market turned and he didn't adapt.

Swiss dude, worth >> $1B, modest house, drove a VW Golf (ok, a nice one), absolutely incorruptible.

They're nice examples to have and I understand that for someone worth that much there is no need to signal anything and that Germany guy may have had to keep up with his 'circle' in order to be seen as successful but still it makes you wonder how much pain there is behind all those frustrated faces in fancy cars living in expensive houses.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#64

Post by RockyMcNuts »

letitgo12345 wrote: post #52

Hmm I went to an Ivy League school. Maybe it was the company I hung out with but there was never really any talk of how rich anyone's background was (in fact it was kind of taboo) -- the same way no one ever talked about what their SAT scores were. It seemed petty. There were several well off kids in my social circle (though not mega rich or anything) but there wasn't really any flaunting of wealth. In fact, many of…

+1 granted it was in the 80s but off the top of my head 40% on major financial aid and work-study, 40% upper middle class, maybe 20% were playing the wealth card and gentle mockery would usually keep'em in line. Not sure if times have changed that much or class consciousness is just a perennial trope for whinging.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#65

Post by cperciva »

JoeAltmaier wrote: post #37
iaw wrote: post #29

The most logistically frustrating part of the ordeal: "Dining halls at some schools, for example, close for spring break, though some students can’t afford to leave campus."

Even during the semester, they didn't serve on Sunday. Presumably because you were all out with friends, eating at a pub or whatever. I just didn't eat on Sunday night.

Huh, I had completely forgotten about that. I had the same experience in Oxford -- my college served breakfast/lunch/dinner 6 days a week, but on Sunday there was just a brunch, and most weeks I ended up not eating dinner on Sunday.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#66

Post by gmarx »

dsp1234 wrote: post #51
spiritplumber wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boot…

Obviously a side note, but I did a test on a topic similar to this. My SO convinced me to try out a custom shoe place (highly reviewed, and recommended) on the theory that if I was only going to buy one pair of shoes, that I should at least have a quality pair to wear around. The results from that (sole) experiment were that the shoes lasted longer but not so much so that they beat out multiple pairs of cheaper shoes…

If you're talking about dress shoes you don't expect the soles to last especially longer than those on cheap dress shoes. With the higher quality ones you can, and it is worth it to, resole and remanufacture them multiple times. My best dress shoes are ten years old, have been redone once, and are likely to last another 20 years.

That said, I don't think this accounts for rich people having more money

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#67

Post by scottbruin »

dsp1234 wrote: post #51
spiritplumber wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boot…

Obviously a side note, but I did a test on a topic similar to this. My SO convinced me to try out a custom shoe place (highly reviewed, and recommended) on the theory that if I was only going to buy one pair of shoes, that I should at least have a quality pair to wear around. The results from that (sole) experiment were that the shoes lasted longer but not so much so that they beat out multiple pairs of cheaper shoes…

What kind of quality shoes? Good dress-y shoes can be resoled so they should last more than 4 years.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#68

Post by jheriko »

jacquesm wrote: post #63
jheriko wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

true. its one to take carefully with consideration.... have you met many rich people who spend like there is no tomorrow? its about acting like a /rich person/ not as if you have a limitless supply of money and are actually rich. :)

Not the person you asked but: I have met people that became wealthy and acted like you describe and they usually ended up broke some years or decades later. I've also met some extremely wealthy people and they in fact were visually very modest (but worth more money than one could spend in a lifetime). The contrast runs something like this: German dude, worth $10M made his money in real estate, started an online compa…

i never really took the advice that way. this is probably down to my stereotype of the rich person...

people who stay rich do not just spaff their money around left, right and centre. i think rich people call this 'new money' and using such a term would be an example of acting like a rich person.

Re: What is it like to be poor at an Ivy League school?

#70

Post by vcxzxcv »

stegosaurus wrote: post #9

I attended an elite UK university having had a poor upbringing. This article reads painfully to me. I don't have the words to describe why, but I can try. The closest I can come is to say that this idea of inclusiveness is terminally broken. It's a sort of bandage over a huge chasm of differences. For a poor person to become wealthy requires them to discard their baggage. Change the accent, the clothes, the pop cultu…

Thanks for this post. I'm debating applying to a state University right now. Coming from a poor background (and still being poor) I find it hard to relate to a lot of my peers. You speak of "dropping baggage", and for me, this is next to impossible because of my poor dental health. As soon as I open my mouth people assume I must be some meth head. My mom has dementia and can barely take care of her self and my dad is struggling with COPD. I'm not going to go further into my home life because I'm not looking for pity.

I'm one the best math students at my current school and calculus is fun for me. I'm the only person I know that knows how to program, none of the other students I've met are interested in computers at all.

The students that are performing at the same level as I am seem (to me) to be "elites". I find my self becoming more and more cynical each day listening to complaints about having an old model of iPhone or "having to go to Paris with dad" (someone really said this), when all I have is a flip phone and I've never ridden on a plane.

I told my self a few years ago I was going to learn to program because it seemed to be something that anyone could do (as long as you have a computer and internet access), seemed to be growing, and seemed to be high paying. I've gotten pretty good, but I still have a ways to go.

Now I'm at the point where I can leave my disabled parents for school and let my teeth continue to decay and deal with that social stigma, or I can get a job doing tech support and hopefully help my situation a little faster.

We'll see..

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