Ask HN: How do you deal with professional jealousy and getting older?

It seems you are preoccupied with the notion of age, thinking that it should somehow relate to ability. It doesn't. While we all may follow a similar curriculum while in school when outside of academia age has little to do with where you're at.

Perhaps you recognise that peer-pressure & comparison is a huge motivator for you (it's probably what got you through your CS degree) you are trying to use that stick to force you to work more. However it's having an adverse effect on you. You cease to enjoy anything.

Try and make something small, just for you, just for fun. Focus on being happy instead of perceived success. What if you just let yourself enjoy your TV show or browsing HN? You may feel freer to enjoy your work.

You are not behind or in front, you are exactly where you are at right now.

You can't run a race if you're busy looking over your shoulder.

Your mention of feeling jealous reminds me of a quote from Mary Schmich when talking about advice she would give to the younger generation.

"Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself."

I'll second (or third etc) those that previously said you need to sit back and take some perspective. 26 y/o with what looks to be some good experience, and a CS degree at a top 10 university with an emergency fund that can carry you through that much unemployment? You have it made. Maybe I just don't get that sort of drive? Don't get me wrong, I have drive, I'm just guessing not that much. Here's some perspective (and I'm a fortunate soul too):

I'm 38. I didn't go to college out of high school, I went into the Marines. I wanted to be a Journalist, but I didn't score high enough on the ASVAB apparently and got stuck with an Audio/Video job. I was far from a Valedictorian, I scraped by with Bs and Cs. Fast forward years later, having worked many other jobs from factories/warehouses to gas stations; I grew weary and went to college. I was 27. How did you think I felt after little to no career success? I switched Majors three times. Started with the intention of doing Physical Therapy, switched to Pre-Pharmacy, then Biochemistry - struggled immensely, and finally went CS, sort of. I picked a CIS degree because it would have been another year of college to do the CS (the math would have added much of that).

I graduated at 31. I'm not a ninja programmer, and compared to much of HN I'd have to agree I'm pretty mediocre.

So there you have it, one additional perspective in this enjoyable thread. One more data point to show you that you have more than you think, and shouldn't always compare yourself to the extreme outliers.

Edit: for what it's worth, I'm relatively happy with myself as a person if not super proud of my current situation in my career (making much less than I could be).

Forget about what other people are doing - focus on what you want to do. That is my philosophy towards software development - while I do spend a lot of time coding and contributing to open source, I don't feel like a slave to it, and am more than willing to not do it when I don't feel like it or don't want to.

I am 30 - I only started professionally coding almost 2 1/2 years ago. Compared to some of the younger hotshots out there, I'm behind, and that's ok - I accept that. The important thing is to learn new things, and from whatever you can. What other people do doesn't matter when it comes to improving yourself because all you can do is control your life.

I've been editing to fill in some more details. I'd rather not discuss my experiences with medications specifically here, but feel free to shoot me an e-mail (see profile) and I'll be happy to answer any questions I can.

> many nights I end up vegging out in front of the TV or aimlessly clicking around on the internet

An Adderall prescription works well for this. Also a standing desk. I find standing so much work I don't like browsing news sites while doing it, I just want to get my work done and take a break, lol.