I'm ashamed to say I donate $0. It's the right thing to do, it's altruistic and I respect the people that do it; but I can't bring myself to care more about the rest of the world then I care about myself/my family. Am i the norm or the minority?
You and your family live in the rest of the world. It's not just altruistic, it's also rational for your own self interests. It's not mutually exclusive: That's a false dichotomy. If you can't care about your community enough to donate something , then I think your values may need reexamining. Even if that something is donation of old clothes and used items instead of throwing everything away. And finally, it's not a…
My self interest benefits more if I use the money for myself rather then giving it away and getting the benefits in a form that is heavily diluted. It is the aggregate donations of people that can, in the end mutually benefit my self interest. However my individual donation is just a drop in the bucket; I stand to benefit the most by not donating and letting others donate. Thus, the logical move is to not donate. It is actually counter intuitively detrimental to my self interest if everyone acted this way. Garrett Hardin described the paradox in his famous paper:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tragedy_of_the_commons
This does not mean I think it's ok not to donate. A large part of our lives as humans are not dictated by logic. What I meant in the original post is that from an emotional standpoint I just don't feel a heavy burden that I need to donate. $20000 that could be a donation I'd rather spend on a worthless luxury (i.e. new car) for me... and that's not logic talking either, it's just my gut, emotional desire.